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Friendship Therapy
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Friendship Therapy
Author: Emma Reed Turrell
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© Copyright Emma Reed Turrell
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Friendship Therapy is a brand new podcast, in which psychotherapist and author Emma Reed Turrell talks to real people about real friendships and looks at these pivotal relationships through a therapy lens.
75 Episodes
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Welcome to the first episode of Dial Emma from Friendship Therapy! This is where you get to Dial Emma, with your dilemma (see what I did there?!) You share your friendship concerns, and I share my reflections as a therapist to give you the tips and tools you need to build better bonds. This week, we hear from a listener who wants to make new friends post-university, but as an introvert, they find the prospect of trying to meet new people very daunting. This listener also struggles with fears of rejection and feeling like they are not enough. In her reflections, Emma talks about endings, change, growth, and the importance of allowing ourselves to take the pressure off and get curious about who we are, what we’re actually looking for in friendships and what we can offer as a friend. What advice would you give this listener? If you’ve got a friendship dilemma and you'd like Emma's help, drop us a voicenote on Instagram @friendshiptherapypod!---Friendship Therapy is hosted by Emma Reed Turrell, produced by Chris Sharp and Lauren Brook.--- Social media: Emma Reed Turrell @emmareedturrellFriendship Therapy @friendshiptherapypodEmail: contact@friendshiptherapypod.co.uk
Welcome to season two of Friendship Therapy! This is the podcast in which author and psychotherapist Emma Reed Turrell talks to real people about real friendships and looks at these pivotal relationships through a therapy lens.In our first episode of season two, Emma looks at overthinking in friendship with her guest, primary school teacher and mother of three, Rose. It's a conversation that takes us to an unexpected place, but one that ultimately helps Rose to unpack her overthinking in friendship, and understand why it may come down to a fear of loss.When she was just nine years old, Rose left Australia for a trip to England with her mother and brother, expecting her father to join them a fortnight later. Tragically, Rose's dad never made it to England. He died suddenly during their first week away, and life would never be the same again.During this conversation, Emma and Rose explore the idea that her tendency to worry about her friendships might have something to do with the loss of her father when she was a child, and whether teaching a group of nine year olds for the first time this year might have emerged some big feelings for the nine year old she once was.In her reflections on the episode, Emma also reminds us that it's hard to feel, but sometimes, it's harder not to.If you’d like to apply to appear on the podcast, please click the link below to fill out the form: https://forms.gle/owsfs6DVxVdTMFo46 ---Friendship Therapy is hosted by Emma Reed Turrell, produced by Chris Sharp and Lauren Brook.--- Social media: Emma Reed Turrell @emmareedturrellFriendship Therapy @friendshiptherapypodEmail: contact@friendshiptherapypod.co.uk
Welcome back to Friendship Therapy, and our last episode of season one! This is the bitesize episode, where Emma discusses her therapeutic takeaways from her conversation with this week's guests, Victoria and Helen.Having met (and bonded over their shared love of musical theatre) at a time when many of their peers were meeting 'the one,' Victoria and Helen joined Emma on the podcast to talk about finding a life partner in a friend, the lack of representation of platonic relationships in the media, and the challenges that they have faced as two heterosexual women who have found a soulmate in each other.In this bitesize episode, Emma reflects on the blind spots that she often sees in romantic relationships and explores some of the themes that came up in her conversation with Victoria and Helen, drawing on her 15 years of experience as a psychotherapist to answer some of the bigger questions when it comes to modern partnerships. Why is society still failing to recognise the significance and value of friendships? Does longevity equal success when it comes to relationships? And how can we create space in our relationships to allow each other to grow, develop, evolve and change? Find out what you might be missing: https://www.penguin.co.uk/books/454959/what-am-i-missing-by-turrell-emma-reed/9780241624982If you’d like to apply to appear on the podcast in season two, please click the link below to fill out the form: https://forms.gle/owsfs6DVxVdTMFo46 ---Friendship Therapy is hosted by Emma Reed Turrell, produced by Chris Sharp and Lauren Brook.--- Social media: Emma Reed Turrell @emmareedturrellFriendship Therapy @friendshiptherapypodEmail: contact@friendshiptherapypod.co.uk
Welcome back to Friendship Therapy, the podcast where psychotherapist, author and podcaster Emma Reed Turrell looks at your friendship experiences through a therapy lens.In the final full episode of season one (don't worry, there's still Friday's bitesize episode to come!), Emma chats to Helen, 29, and Victoria, 32, about the value of friendships compared to romantic relationships, finding your life partner within a platonic relationship, and why some partnerships simply can't be categorised - but that doesn't mean that they are any less valid or important.Helen and Victoria, both working as teachers, met at a musical theatre society when they were in their late twenties and early thirties - a crucial time during which many of their peers were meeting 'the one' and building a life with a romantic partner. Meanwhile, Helen and Victoria found in each other a platonic soulmate, a life partner with whom they could share all the domesticities of daily life, and connect with deeply on an emotional level too. By society's standards, Helen and Victoria's relationship is very much outside of the norm, and they simply can't and won't fit neatly into a box that is recognisable, or even acceptable, to the people around them.In this episode, Helen and Victoria share their experience of finding a soulmate in a friend, the radical acceptance and permission to be themselves that they bring to each other's lives, and their frustration at the way society has failed to recognise the significance and value of platonic relationships. Emma also reflects on a deeply meaningful platonic relationship in her own life, and identifies a potential blind spot that we could all overcome.If you’d like to apply to appear on the podcast in season two, please click the link below to fill out the form: https://forms.gle/owsfs6DVxVdTMFo46 ---Friendship Therapy is hosted by Emma Reed Turrell, produced by Chris Sharp and Lauren Brook.--- Social media: Emma Reed Turrell @emmareedturrellFriendship Therapy @friendshiptherapypodEmail: contact@friendshiptherapypod.co.uk
Welcome back to Friendship Therapy! This is the bitesize episode, where Emma discusses her therapeutic takeaways from her conversation with this week's guest, Rachel.On Monday's episode, Rachel bravely opened up about the loss of her father two years ago. It was a bereavement that, in her words, 'shone a light' on the friends who were willing to get in the trenches with her, and those who couldn't meet her where she was.For Rachel, the death of her dad signified the end of an incredibly difficult six months since his re-diagnosis, during which she had to contend with the inevitable arrival of her very worst fear, and the loss of the hope that she had been holding on to since she was a 12 year old girl making wishes on birthday candles. The losses that Rachel had experienced since she was a child gave her a sense of vigilance that stayed with her into adulthood, causing her to feel fearful of change, particularly within her friendship groups.In this bitesize episode, Emma explores where Rachel's fear of loss and endings originates from and how it is showing up in her friendships now, with the help of the blind spot profiles in her latest book, What am I Missing? Emma also explains the concept of 'compound loss' in therapy and how we can begin to navigate it, and why fear, hope, love and sadness exist most productively when we allow them to co-exist.Find out more about the blind spot profiles: https://www.penguin.co.uk/books/454959/what-am-i-missing-by-turrell-emma-reed/9780241624982If you’d like to apply to appear on the podcast in season two, please click the link below to fill out the form: https://forms.gle/owsfs6DVxVdTMFo46 ---Friendship Therapy is hosted by Emma Reed Turrell, produced by Chris Sharp and Lauren Brook.--- Social media: Emma Reed Turrell @emmareedturrellFriendship Therapy @friendshiptherapypodEmail: contact@friendshiptherapypod.co.uk
Welcome back to Friendship Therapy, the podcast where psychotherapist, author and podcaster Emma Reed Turrell looks at your friendship experiences through a therapy lens. This week, Emma chats to 28-year-old Rachel about intertwining our identity with our friendships, the process of 'trimming' friends over time as we grow and age, and how the turbulence and loss of our teens and twenties can affect our friendships.Rachel very sadly lost her dad when she was 26, and as an only child, she found the process of grieving incredibly isolating and lonely. It wasn't the first time she had gone through turbulence and change in her home life; Rachel's dad was first diagnosed with cancer when she was just 12 years old, and when she was 16, her parents separated. Without a sibling who she could share the loss with, Rachel's friends stepped in to hold her hand in the trenches of grief and help her navigate some of the most challenging moments in her life.In this episode, Rachel speaks so honestly and candidly about grief, loss and hope, the parental role that she played in her friendship groups and how that changed and evolved over time, leaning into reciprocity in relationships, and navigating the fear of loss as our lives and friendships take on a different trajectory.Learn more about the blind spots in Emma's new book, What am I Missing?: https://www.penguin.co.uk/books/454959/what-am-i-missing-by-turrell-emma-reed/9780241624982If you’d like to apply to appear on the podcast in season two, please click the link below to fill out the form: https://forms.gle/owsfs6DVxVdTMFo46 ---Friendship Therapy is hosted by Emma Reed Turrell, produced by Chris Sharp and Lauren Brook.--- Social media: Emma Reed Turrell @emmareedturrellFriendship Therapy @friendshiptherapypodEmail: contact@friendshiptherapypod.co.uk
Welcome back to Friendship Therapy! This is the bitesize episode, where Emma discusses her therapeutic takeaways from her conversation with this week's guest, Jemima.Jemima joined us to talk about her experience of being diagnosied with dyspraxia when she was just six years old, and the impact that neurodivergence has had on her life and friendships. We heard about the remedial classes that she was put through, the hours spent throwing and catching balls in her back garden, the extra effort that she had to put in to try to fit in with the other children; all of which led her to resent her diagnosis. Later, in adulthood, Jemima found herself rejecting the idea of being 'parented' by her friends, having already spent almost her entire life being told what her limits were and what she definitely couldn't do because she is neurodivergent.In this bitesize episode, Emma returns to Eric Berne's parent, adult, child model in transactional analysis, exploring how the different facets of the parent and child ego states might be showing up in Jemima's friendships and in her own internal processes.Eric Berne's parent, adult, child theory: https://www.simplypsychology.org/transactional-analysis-eric-berne.htmlIf you’d like to apply to appear on the podcast in season two, please click the link below to fill out the form: https://forms.gle/owsfs6DVxVdTMFo46 ---Friendship Therapy is hosted by Emma Reed Turrell, produced by Chris Sharp and Lauren Brook.--- Social media: Emma Reed Turrell @emmareedturrellFriendship Therapy @friendshiptherapypodEmail: contact@friendshiptherapypod.co.uk
Welcome back to Friendship Therapy, the podcast where psychotherapist, author and podcaster Emma Reed Turrell looks at your friendship experiences through a therapy lens. This week, Emma chats to Jemima, who reached out to Emma to talk about the impact that neurodivergence has had on her friendships.Diagnosed at just six years old, dyspraxia has affected every aspect of Jemima's life since she was a small child, from being put into remedial classes at school, to throwing and catching balls with her brother so she could be more like the other children. Jemima's family just wanted to keep her safe from a world that didn't necessarily understand her, but Jemima wanted to reject her dyspraxia diagnosis altogether. Now, as a woman in her forties, she has come to learn a lot about herself and the way she exists in the world as a neurodiverse woman with her own unique experiences in life and in friendship.In this episode, Jemima generously shares how she navigates friendship and dyspraxia. We hear about her experience of being neurodivergent in a world that doesn't always celebrate difference, struggling with burnout and feelings of rejection and abandonment, and through it all, the unwavering support, love and encouragement that her friends and family have shown her.Jemima's story reminds us that when we mess up, as we inevitably will, having grace for ourselves and for our friends can be an incredibly powerful metric of friendship.To find out more about Eric Berne's Parent, Adult, Child theory, click here: https://www.simplypsychology.org/transactional-analysis-eric-berne.htmlInformation on dyspraxia from the NHS website: https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/developmental-coordination-disorder-dyspraxia-in-adults/Exceptional Individuals - https://exceptionalindividuals.com/Some book recommendations from Jemima:The Lion Who Wanted to Love - https://www.amazon.co.uk/Lion-Who-Wanted-Love/dp/1860399134/ref=asc_df_1860399134/?tag=googshopuk-21&linkCode=df0&hvadid=697208928393&hvpos=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=9929041182393392105&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=c&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=9046002&hvtargid=pla-537898099083&psc=1&mcid=36f7310928af3f02b640a4340b0442d0&th=1&psc=1&gad_source=1Autism in Heels - https://booksplea.se/autism-in-heels-the-untold-story-of-a-female-life-on-the-spectrum-by-jennifer-cook-otoole/?setCurrencyId=1&gad_source=1&gclid=EAIaIQobChMIqanE7ZXbhgMVspVQBh3j_QLDEAQYASABEgL6MfD_BwERhinocorn Rules - https://www.theworks.co.uk/p/picture-books/rhinocorn-rules/WKS_9780008617103.html?gad_source=1&gclid=EAIaIQobChMIyLf5iZbbhgMVw4hQBh2_rAo8EAQYASABEgJYv_D_BwEIf you’d like to apply to appear on the podcast in season two, please click the link below to fill out the form: https://forms.gle/owsfs6DVxVdTMFo46 ---Friendship Therapy is hosted by Emma Reed Turrell, produced by Chris Sharp and Lauren Brook.--- Social media: Emma Reed Turrell @emmareedturrellFriendship Therapy @friendshiptherapypodEmail: contact@friendshiptherapypod.co.uk
Welcome back to Friendship Therapy! This is the bitesize episode, where Emma discusses her therapeutic takeaways from her conversation with this week's guest.This week, Emma met Charlotte, whose fear of losing a treasured childhood friend has her questioning how to keep the spark alive in long-term friendships. When Charlotte and her friend see each other, they can pick right up where they left off: but are they spending too much time down memory lane, rather than updating their friendship into the present?In this bitesize episode, Emma digs deeper into the impact of nostalgia in long-term friendships, how our childhood friends are caretakers for past versions of ourselves, and why passivity or non-confrontation in friendship break-ups can cause us to reinforce our blind spots and fill in the wrong blanks.If you’d like to apply to appear on the podcast in season two, please click the link below to fill out the form: https://forms.gle/owsfs6DVxVdTMFo46 ---Friendship Therapy is hosted by Emma Reed Turrell, produced by Chris Sharp and Lauren Brook.--- Social media: Emma Reed Turrell @emmareedturrellFriendship Therapy @friendshiptherapypodEmail: contact@friendshiptherapypod.co.uk
Welcome back to Friendship Therapy, the podcast where psychotherapist, author and podcaster Emma Reed Turrell looks at your friendship experiences through a therapy lens. This week, Emma chats to 32-year-old Charlotte about how to keep the spark alive in long-term friendships.In this episode, Charlotte opens up about her fear of a childhood friendship 'fizzling out' as they both move into different phases of life and embrace new friendships. She describes how even though their opportunities for connection have lessened over the years, she and this long-term friend can pick up right where they left off when they do see each other, often spending their time together reminiscing about their shared past rather than bringing their friendship into the present.Emma and Charlotte discuss the role that our childhood friends play in being caretakers of our past selves, passivity and lack of clarity in friendship break-ups, how to allocate our friendship energy, and why avoiding confrontation or not updating our friendships into 2024 often causes us to fill in the wrong blanks or reinforce limiting beliefs about ourselves.If you’d like to apply to appear on the podcast in season two, please click the link below to fill out the form: https://forms.gle/owsfs6DVxVdTMFo46 ---Friendship Therapy is hosted by Emma Reed Turrell, produced by Chris Sharp and Lauren Brook.--- Social media: Emma Reed Turrell @emmareedturrellFriendship Therapy @friendshiptherapypodEmail: contact@friendshiptherapypod.co.uk
Welcome back to Friendship Therapy! This is the bitesize episode, where Emma discusses her therapeutic takeaways from her conversation with this week's guest.This week, Emma met another Emma, a psychotherapist who found herself questioning her place in her childhood friendship group after becoming a mother at 19, going through a divorce in her thirties and persuing a new career as a therapist later in life.In this bitesize episode, Emma takes us through the Nursing Triad, healthy first order symbiosis and Eric Berne's Parent, Adult Child ego states theory within Transactional Analysis, and how Emma's friends played a practical and emotional co-parent role in Emma's life as she navigated becoming a mother when she was still a child herself.Emma also reflects on Emma's therapy journey, her growing curiosity and defiance against decades-old patterns, and how she found herself challenging the boundaries and renegotiating her friendships to find out if she could be accepted unconditionally.To find out more about Eric Berne's Parent, Adult, Child theory, click here: https://www.simplypsychology.org/transactional-analysis-eric-berne.htmlIf you’d like to apply to appear on the podcast in season two, please click the link below to fill out the form: https://forms.gle/owsfs6DVxVdTMFo46 ---Friendship Therapy is hosted by Emma Reed Turrell, produced by Chris Sharp and Lauren Brook.--- Social media: Emma Reed Turrell @emmareedturrellFriendship Therapy @friendshiptherapypodEmail: contact@friendshiptherapypod.co.uk
Welcome back to Friendship Therapy, a brand new podcast where psychotherapist, author and podcaster Emma Reed Turrell looks at your friendship experiences through a therapy lens. This week, Emma speaks to fellow psychotherapist, also called Emma.Emma became a mother at 19 and subsequently went through a divorce in her thirties, eventually finding herself in training to become a psychotherapist much later in life than her peers. Through it all, her close-knit group of childhood friends were a guiding light for her - becoming not just a support system, but a partner who showed up for Emma and her daughter practically and emotionally. The friendship dynamic shifted when Emma started having therapy as part of her training, encouraging her to seek authenticity in herself and in her friendships. She found herself wanting to lift lids and have difficult conversations with these childhood friends, seeking to understand them better and make sense of her role in their lives. In this episode, Emma and Emma discuss the impact that therapy can have on our relationships, how to navigate changing dynamics and different life stages, why it’s okay to live with discomfort in our friendships, and how we can sometimes leave the lids where they are and trust that our friends want the best for us.If you’d like to apply to appear on the podcast in season two, please click the link below to fill out the form: https://forms.gle/owsfs6DVxVdTMFo46 ---Friendship Therapy is hosted by Emma Reed Turrell, produced by Chris Sharp and Lauren Brook.--- Social media: Emma Reed Turrell @emmareedturrellFriendship Therapy @friendshiptherapypodEmail: contact@friendshiptherapypod.co.uk
Welcome back to Friendship Therapy and our first bitesize episode, where Emma shares her therapeutic takeaways from her conversation with this week's guests, Janine and Julia.In this bitesize episode, Emma dives into the concept of yin and yang, a term that Janine and Julia use to describe themselves and their friendship. Emma explains how the contrasting dots of colour in the yin and yang symbol represent the need for chaos and control to exist harmoniously, and how this concept can help us to identify what we might need more of in our own lives.Emma also encourages us to think about what we can and want to offer in friendship, why we don't have to tick every single box on someone else's friendship application form, and how our childhood friendships can be updated and nurtured to reflect who we are in the present.If you’d like to apply to appear on the podcast in season two, please click the link below to fill out the form: https://forms.gle/owsfs6DVxVdTMFo46 ---Friendship Therapy is hosted by Emma Reed Turrell, produced by Chris Sharp and Lauren Brook.--- Social media: Emma Reed Turrell @emmareedturrellFriendship Therapy @friendshiptherapypodEmail: contact@friendshiptherapypod.co.uk
Welcome to the first ever episode of Friendship Therapy, a brand new podcast where psychotherapist, author and podcaster Emma Reed Turrell looks at your friendship experiences through a therapy lens. This week, Emma speaks to best friends for 25 years, Janine and Julia. Describing their personalities as ‘yin and yang’, these two women were thrown together in the school playground, becoming friends by default rather than design. In the years that followed, they worked to grow and nurture a deeply meaningful, complex friendship that has seen them through some of the most challenging and joyful moments in their lives. From school sleepover dramas and Sunday night phone calls after Dawson’s Creek, to relationship breakdowns, motherhood and changing priorities, Janine and Julia have remained the constant in each other’s lives for more than two decades. In this very special debut episode, Emma explores the evolution of Janine and Julia’s friendship over the decades, the roles that these two friends filled for each other, and the enduring power of unconditional love, acceptance and consistency in friendship. If you’d like to apply to appear on the podcast in season two, please click the link below: https://forms.gle/owsfs6DVxVdTMFo46 ---Friendship Therapy is hosted by Emma Reed Turrell, produced by Chris Sharp and Lauren Brook.--- Social media: Emma Reed Turrell @emmareedturrellFriendship Therapy @friendshiptherapypodEmail: contact@friendshiptherapypod.co.uk
Well, here we are. Emma is firmly in denial and Elizabeth is busy looking for silver linings because this week's episode of Best Friend Therapy is our LAST ONE EVER. Probably. We have loved every minute of these last two years, as we've curated this collection of conversations to share with you, our wonderful listeners.Thank you so much for having us and we hope you'll join us for one last look back, at the journey we've been on together... We talk about our favourite episodes and look back on some of the memorable moments that made us laugh and cry. We'd love to hear from you about your favourite episodes and what you'll take away from this series and, remember, the back catalogue is there for you whenever you want to dip in and hear some words of comfort and support, or just enjoy hearing us lose it over that pesky rustle in the bush. Elizabeth shares her heartfelt thanks for the space you've given to her feelings on fertility and Emma will forever be grateful for the confidence she's gained to speak her truth more widely. Finally, know that we see you. We hear you. We understand you.And you are not alone. You will always be welcome here.Oh, and watch this space for what comes next...Love Elizabeth and Emma xx---We are so looking forward to seeing some of you IRL at our live finale show on Thursday 4th April, at the Bloomsbury Theatre in London! And if you couldn't get a ticket, or you just fancy watching from the comfort of your own sofa, you can now join us via livestream. Book a ticket to watch live, or on demand for a week after the event, here: https://www.fane.co.uk/best-friend-therapy ---Best Friend Therapy is hosted by Elizabeth Day and Emma Reed Turrell, produced by Chris Sharp. --- Social Media: Elizabeth Day @elizabday Emma Reed Turrell @emmareedturrell Best Friend Therapy @best.friend.therapy Email: contact@bestfriendtherapy.co.uk
We begin this episode with the announcement that this... sniff... will be... sniff... our last season of Best Friend Therapy but DON'T PANIC because there are good reasons which we'll go into and plenty of exciting new projects in the pipeline!Which also means there's no time to lose and so this week we take a deep dive into the work Emma has been developing around her unique model of "blind spot therapy", and which she's sharing with us all in her upcoming book, What Am I Missing?If you have ever wondered why you end up repeating patterns of unhealthly behaviour, in the wrong relationships, caught up in conflict in your family or held back at work, you might be acting out of a blind spot - an area of low or no awareness that means you can't see things clearly and end up tripping over the same obstacles in life. Emma has developed a brand new psychological theory to translate ideas of unconscious bias, learned behaviours and cultural conditioning into four clear and relatable blind spot profiles:Listen along this week and find out whether you might be:THE GLADIATOR, determined but missing trustTHE BRIDGE, easy-going but missing authenticityTHE HUSTLER, charming but missing self-worthOr THE ROCK, resilient but missing boundariesElizabeth explores how being a Bridge/Hustler, or a "Bristle" as we affectionately like to call her, has affected her in the past and Emma explains how her inner Rock led her to become a therapist. Published by Penguin on 4th April, What Am I Missing? will teach you how to overcome the blind spots that are holding you back and explain why, when they said "what you don't know won't hurt you", they couldn't have been more wrong!---EXCLUSIVE PRE-ORDER OFFER: You can get £5 off your copy of What Am I Missing? if you pre-order online at Waterstones and use the code WHATAMIMISSING before the 4th April. https://www.waterstones.com/book/what-am-i-missing/emma-reed-turrell/9780241624982And if you do pre-order a hardback, audiobook or e-book edition from any UK retailer, you can also enter a competition to win an online 1:1 Blind Spot Therapy Session with Emma! Just visit https://penguinrandomhouse.eu.research.net/r/WhatAmIMissingComp to enter your details.Malcolm Gladwell talks about the "10,000-Hour Rule", in his book Outliers, it's an excellent take on what makes us successful: https://amzn.eu/d/2Or36uE ---Best Friend Therapy is hosted by Elizabeth Day and Emma Reed Turrell, produced by Chris Sharp. --- Social Media: Elizabeth Day @elizabday Emma Reed Turrell @emmareedturrell Best Friend Therapy @best.friend.therapy Email: contact@bestfriendtherapy.co.uk
Welcome back to Best Friend Therapy and this season’s opportunity for Emma to therapise our beloved guinea pig, Elizabeth Day, whilst offering some psycho-education for us all about the Transactional Analysis concept of the “Drama Triangle” - why and how we end up repeating conflict in relationships (be they personal or professional) and what we can do to change it.The Drama Triangle was developed by Stephen Karpman in the 1960’s and tells us about three unhealthy roles we take on in drama - the Rescuer, the Persecutor, the Victim.Elizabeth talks about a time she adopted the role of Rescuer as a way of defending her Victim and she recognises the futile task of trying to solve someone’s problems when they are not yet ready to change. She also tells us about the guilt she feels when she fails the other person and we uncover the unconscious motivations that are keeping her stuck. Listen along with an example of your own and ask yourself:If you’re the Rescuer, what are your feelings and needs? If you’re the Persecutor, what can’t you tolerate really? If you’re the Victim, what are your options to take back control? Emma explains and gives examples of how to channel more productive, constructive Adult communication using Acey Choy’s “Winners Triangle”, to remove the conflict and get closer to the results you want.---The original reference for the Drama Triangle is: Karpman MD, Stephen (1968). "Fairy tales and script drama analysis". Transactional Analysis Bulletin. 26 (7): 39–43. https://www.karpmandramatriangle.com/pdf/DramaTriangle.pdf Choy, Acey (1990). The Winner's Triangle Transactional Analysis Journal 20(1):40 https://www.scribd.com/document/577707612/Winner-s-Triangle And this brilliant book by Ian Stewart and Vann Joines is a great introduction to all things TA, including Eric Berne’s work on Games: https://amzn.eu/d/eZEkUmD ---Best Friend Therapy is hosted by Elizabeth Day and Emma Reed Turrell, produced by Chris Sharp. --- Social Media: Elizabeth Day @elizabday Emma Reed Turrell @emmareedturrell Best Friend Therapy @best.friend.therapy Email: contact@bestfriendtherapy.co.uk
What is introversion and extroversion anyway?This week we’re drawing on the ideas of Carl Jung, and the Big Five personality traits, to help us understand why some people get their energy from being around other people, and others prefer to recharge their batteries on their own. Emma challenges the idea that it’s simply a matter of personality, and wonders whether we develop these behaviours as an adaptation to societal pressures, and Elizabeth explains why, as an introvert, she prefers a voice note to a phone call. We chat about the impact of social media and the pandemic, cross-cultural influences and, most importantly, whether you’re a bath or a shower person. --- Carl Jung on psychological types: Jung, C. G. [1921] 1971. Psychological Types, Collected Works of C.G. Jung, vol. 6. Princeton, NJ: Princeton University Press. More on the Big Five personality traits: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Big_Five_personality_traits ---Best Friend Therapy is hosted by Elizabeth Day and Emma Reed Turrell, produced by Chris Sharp. --- Social Media:Elizabeth Day @elizabdayEmma Reed Turrell @emmareedturrellBest Friend Therapy @best.friend.therapyEmail: contact@bestfriendtherapy.co.uk
This week on Best Friend Therapy, we tackle the thorny issue of comparison - how it gets in our way, what its true function is and how it can actually direct us to feel happier and more fulfilled.From Reese Witherspoon to Richard II, we cover themes of unconditional acceptance and safety, via the rise of social media and the Peasants Revolt (bear with us, ED is ever the historian). Emma teaches us the difference between jealousy and envy and Elizabeth tells us how gratitude is her antidote to comparison (and why ex’s are no longer up for discussion).—-Emma does the show notes and gave up history as a subject as quickly as possible, so if you’re looking for references on Richard II and the Peasants Revolt, you’re on your own.Naomi Klein’s book, however, is available here: Doppelganger: A Trip Into the Mirror World https://amzn.eu/d/gCFeiar---Best Friend Therapy is hosted by Elizabeth Day and Emma Reed Turrell, produced by Chris Sharp. ---Social Media:Elizabeth Day @elizabdayEmma Reed Turrell @emmareedturrellBest Friend Therapy @best.friend.therapyEmail: contact@bestfriendtherapy.co.uk
Welcome to this week's episode of Best Friend Therapy - the one where we ask the tough questions...* What's the difference between emotional detachment and emotional unavailability?* Why can needs get confused with neediness?* How do sympathy and empathy serve different purposes? We explore how emotional detachment can actually help us to develop greater empathy and deepen authentic relationships, with others and ourselves. And we explain what happens when we don’t detach - how we can lose objectivity and fall foul of merging with others, enmeshing our experiences, projecting our beliefs and outsourcing our authentic needs... Emma explains why she used to work for brownie points and Elizabeth gets interested in the inner psyche of the teenage girl. ---Not for the first time we reference the Love Languages work of Gary Chapman: https://amzn.eu/d/68aAaOc---🚨 BIG NEWS 🚨 Not only are we back for a seventh season, but Elizabeth and Emma will be hosting a LIVE SHOW for the very first time! Book your tickets and join us live at the Bloomsbury Theatre on Thursday 4th April. We can’t wait to see your gorgeous faces IRL! 🎟️ fane.co.uk/best-friend-therapy --- Best Friend Therapy is hosted by Elizabeth Day and Emma Reed Turrell, produced by Chris Sharp. --- Social Media:Elizabeth Day @elizabdayEmma Reed Turrell @emmareedturrellBest Friend Therapy @best.friend.therapyEmail: contact@bestfriendtherapy.co.uk
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beautiful friendship. Thank you for sharing ❤
Love, love this ♥️
Love the words of wisdom. Thank you so much and your humour and giggles crack me up. Truly unique ♥️
my absolute favourite podcast ♥️
Love, love this one. So many golden nuggets. I have all the symptoms of perfectionism.
oh wow. Emma is amazing with the help of Elizabeth. I feel like am having my very own therapy session with each episode. Love, love it ♥️♥️♥️
I am an INFJ too!. That is why I am so in tune with Elizabeth. Love everything she does.
I get so much from all your Best Friend Therapy podcasts, but this one, is revelatory! Thank you xxx
Oh my goodness what a profoundly enlightening episode. Thank you Emma and Elizabeth. So grateful 🙏🙏❣
Incredible episode. I have learnt so much about myself. Therapy right there 🙏🙏❣
beautiful episode 🙏❣
I too have enjoyed every episode and gained so much from each one. Thank you both and dare i say keep them rolling!
I absolutely love listening to this podcast. It is so insightful and thought provoking.
I have learnt so much from this podcast! Highly recommend if you are interested in how our brains work and why we do/say/feel the things we do.
Absolute treasure chest of sound thinking, honesty and insight. Loved it.