Combative Calm

This episode isn’t your usual holiday meditation filled with cheerful tunes and sparkly sentiments. Instead, it’s for those who feel the weight of the season pressing down on them.If you’re mourning someone you’ve loved, someone who’s slipping away, or even a version of yourself that feels lost, this meditation is for you.It’s also for anyone carrying the collective heaviness of the world right now. Together, we’ll explore breathwork, grounding techniques, and a deep visualization that invites you to face your grief head-on. This isn’t about fixing or glossing over it: it’s about acknowledging it, giving it a space in your heart, and simply being with those heavy emotions that linger, despite all the pressure to be jolly.I share Rumi’s poem “The Guest House,” which is central to this practice. It’s a reminder that grief is a visitor, not a punishment or a mark of failure. Together, we’ll explore breathwork, grounding techniques, and a deep visualization that encourages you to face your grief openly. This isn’t about fixing things or pretending they’re better than they are. It’s about acknowledging your feelings, making space for them in your heart, and simply being present with those heavy emotions that linger, even when there’s pressure to feel cheerful.If the holidays feel especially overwhelming, hollow, or sharp for you, I invite you to take a moment with me. Let’s breathe together, sit with what hurts, and remember that you don’t have to shine brightly to get through this season. If you can find just 15 minutes, you have enough time to uncover a little softness amidst the heaviness.

This isn’t your grandma’s meditation — it’s Dr. Seuss meets nervous-system healing.If you’ve ever tried to host, decorate, shop, and “stay present” all at once, this episode is your invitation to drop the glitter and breathe.Inspired by The Grinch and my lifelong love of Dr. Seuss, this 9-minute guided meditation is equal parts poetic and practical — a story-time exhale for anyone drowning in seasonal perfectionism, fake smiles, or family drama.We’ll breathe. We’ll rhyme. We’ll laugh a little at how ridiculous it all is.And somewhere in there, your shoulders will drop two inches, your nervous system will chill out, and you might even remember what peace feels like.Perfect for: • hiding in your car before another family dinner • crying about the mashed potatoes • or needing one damn moment that’s actually about youPut in your earbuds, close your eyes, and let’s get weirdly calm together.

If you’ve ever hosted a holiday that looked picture-perfect and secretly wanted to crawl under the table mid-dinner—this one’s for you.In this Dr. Seuss-inspired episode, Sarai gets real about the overachiever spiral that turns “festive” into “fight-or-flight.” From curated chaos to the silent panic of being everyone’s emotional support human, she calls out the bullshit of holiday perfectionism and gives your body something it actually needs: rest & reset.You’ll learn grounding, gentle nervous-system resets that help you unclench from performance mode and drop back into presence—like bilateral tapping to calm your brain’s alarm system, progressive muscle relaxation to release tension, slow sways that tell your body it’s safe again, and a few small but powerful ways to move energy without losing your mind.This isn’t hustle culture’s version of self-care. It’s the antidote.So take off the matching pajamas, leave the dishes, and join your own nervous system for once.Perfection’s overrated. 

If the holidays make you want to chug eggnog straight from the carton, this one’s for you.This Dr. Seuss–inspired episode is equal parts poetry, nervous system science, and dark comedy for anyone drowning in tinsel and expectations.Sarai shares her infamous “I threw up on Thanksgiving dinner” story (yes, really) to unpack how perfectionism, family pressure, and performative holiday joy mess with your nervous system. Between rhymes and raw truth, she calls out the glitter-coated bullshit of “holiday cheer” culture—because no amount of matching pajamas can regulate your cortisol.You’ll get anti-perfection affirmations like: It’s honest, hysterical, and healing as hell.By the end, you’ll want to trade your sparkle for sanity and declare yourself deep in your Resting Grinch Phase—and finally mean it.

This one’s different. It’s longer. It’s raw. It’s 26 minutes of dark humor, grief, and real talk about surviving the holidays when everything feels too damn heavy.We’re talking anticipatory grief (the kind that hits before loss), family chaos, and that weird cultural pressure to “be merry” when you’re just trying not to throw a ham at someone. I share about losing my best friend, watching my dad slip away, and the invisible grief that nobody brings a casserole for.This episode blends comedy, science, and heartbreak. It’s messy and real—because so are the holidays. You’ll laugh, maybe cry, probably snort, and definitely feel seen.It’s not a healing guide. It’s a nervous system survival plan for the emotionally fried and spiritually feral.Sorry not sorry—it’s the most human episode I’ve ever recorded.

This meditation is for the days when your body feels miles away and your brain’s buffering wheel just keeps spinning. When you’re not “fine,” but you can’t fall apart either.In The Slow Return, Sarai guides you through a nervous-system-safe experience for thawing freeze mode — the moment when your body hits pause because the world’s been too fucking much. It’s slow. Gentle. Real. You’ll move through breath, micro-movements, sensory grounding, and a mirror moment that helps you finally meet the part of you that’s been waiting to feel seen.There’s no pushing, no performance, no pressure to “rise.” This is about remembering the version of you that stayed — even when everything else shut down.Listen when:You feel numb, heavy, or far from yourself.You’ve been in survival mode so long that peace feels foreign.You’re ready to stop fighting your body and start listening to it again.You’ll leave with: A body that feels a little less frozen. A breath that feels like it actually belongs to you. And a reminder that healing isn’t a race — it’s a slow return.

If you’ve been feeling like a human iPhone stuck on 1%, welcome to the freeze response — the least sexy survival state in the nervous-system lineup.This episode breaks down what’s actually happening when your body taps out: We go full nerd on the dorsal vagal system, the HPA axis, and the neurochemistry that makes you feel like a ghost in your own skin.Then we move — slowly, gently — through six science-backed somatic resets to help you thaw without forcing anything: eye-tracking, micro-movements, temperature contrast, humming, and soft pressure techniques that whisper safety back into your body.No toxic positivity. No “just get up and move.”Just real neuroscience, explained in human language, with zero shame and a few well-placed F-bombs.By the end, you’ll understand why freeze happens, how to tell when you’re in it, and what to actually do when your nervous system goes full opossum mode. You’ll walk away with tools to reconnect to your body — one millimeter, one hum, one breath at a time.Listen if:You’ve been “numb but exhausted” for months.You keep calling it burnout, but it feels more like vanishing.You want to know what’s going on in your brain when everything just... stops.

If you’ve been staring at your wall, forgetting what day it is, or moving slower than a dial-up modem in hell—welcome to freeze mode.This episode isn’t about “snapping out of it.” It’s about calling out your nervous system’s bullshit with love, laughter, and a few strategic F-bombs. We’ll breathe (the lazy way), swear (the effective way), and roast the entire concept of hustle culture until your body remembers how to exist again.Expect chaotic affirmations, zero toxic positivity, and one sacred mantra: “Fuck it. I’m breathing.”Listen if:You’ve been scrolling so long you forgot what you were looking for.Every task feels like climbing Everest in emotional Crocs.You’re convinced everyone else is thriving while you’re buffering.Featuring:4-6 breathwork for the chronically frozenMicro-movement wins for when your limbs refuse to participateSarai-approved sarcasm and nervous-system truth bombs

This isn’t a calm, whispery meditation for people who have their shit together.This is for the overthinkers, the anxious gremlins, and the “I might spontaneously combust if one more person emails me ‘per my last message’” crowd.In this episode, we’re not transcending—we’re surviving. You’ll breathe & face your anxiety Gremlin.  No sage. No sit-still-and-smile. Just a feral, hilarious, full-body permission slip to stop pretending you’re fine.You’ll meet your anxiety gremlin (mine’s named Brenda), tell them to sit the hell down, and breathe until your body remembers that being alive doesn’t have to feel like an Olympic sport.By the end, you won’t just be “calm.” You’ll be clear. You’ll be human. You’ll be breathing — and that’s enough.Listen if: • Your brain won’t shut the fuck up. • You’re tired of “just meditate” advice from people who’ve never had a panic attack. • You want to laugh your way out of a spiral instead of dissociating through it.

If anxiety had a sporting event, you’d be a decorated athlete.Heart pounding? Gold medal.Jaw clenched? Silver.Overthinking a text from 3 days ago? Hell yeah, podium finish.This episode isn’t about calming down — it’s about getting that chaotic energy out of your body before you spontaneously combust. We’re ditching the mindfulness apps and doing six full-body nervous system resets that actually work.You’ll shake like a confused gazelle, growl like a rabid Wookiee, and sigh so hard your neighbors might call for a wellness check. Every weird-ass movement has a scientific reason (and zero shame attached).By the end, you’ll feel human again — not perfect, not zen, but grounded enough to remember that regulation doesn’t mean calm; it means coming home to your body, one ridiculous breath at a time.

My Brain Is a Flight Risk: affirmations that don’t suck ass balls If your brain’s been auditioning for Doomsday: The Musical, congratulations — you have anxiety.This episode is for the overthinkers, the catastrophizers, and the “what-if-everything-explodes” crowd. We’re not pretending to be calm; we’re learning to breathe through the chaos with sarcasm and a nervous laugh.We’ll talk about why anxiety is basically your brain’s overprotective stage mom, and I’ll walk you through affirmations that don’t sound like pastel Pinterest lies. The kind that make you snort-laugh and actually regulate your nervous system.By the end, your jaw will be looser, your shoulders lower, and your brain might stop yelling for five damn minutes.No promises, but hey — that’s progress.

This meditation isn’t about letting go — it’s about learning to live with what stays.Grief doesn’t disappear when you ignore it. It weaves itself into who you are, reshaping you quietly, changing your rhythm.In this guided meditation, you’ll be invited to stop trying to fix what was never broken — to breathe, to hold the weight you’ve been carrying, and to walk with it instead of fighting it.You’ll meet your grief as something sacred, not shameful. You’ll learn to carry it without letting it crush you.If you’ve been trying to “get over it,” this episode will help you remember:You don’t heal from love — you integrate it.And grief is love, staying.Perfect for nights when the ache feels endless, mornings that start too heavy, or any moment when you just need someone to say: you can keep walking with this, and still be whole.

Grief doesn’t just live in your heart — it hides in your shoulders, your gut, your jaw, and every muscle that’s been holding it together for too long. This Spit. Scream. Surrender. session isn’t about talking your way through pain — it’s about moving through it.We’ll shake, pound, scream, fold, and breathe — full-body, primal, and raw — to let grief do what it was designed to do: move. No pretty poses. No forced calm. Just you, your breath, your body, and the release that comes when you stop trying to keep it together.Perfect for the moments when you can’t cry, can’t focus, and can’t explain why you feel like your skin doesn’t fit anymore.

This one’s for the grief nobody sees. The kind that doesn’t get casseroles, condolences, or a hashtag. I hold space for the heartbreak of both the personal and the collective — from watching the world fracture and ache, to grieving someone who’s still here, to mourning the versions of ourselves that quietly die along the way.Through gentle 4-6 breathwork and grounding affirmations, I invite you to stop fixing and start witnessing. You’ll learn to honor endings without apology, to make space for invisible sorrow, and to remember that grief is just love staying behind for a while.This isn’t about moving on. It’s about breathing through.

This isn’t about banishing anxiety — it’s about giving it a chair without letting it redecorate your whole damn house. In this 10-minute guided meditation, we breathe (4-7-8), welcome every messy emotion, and drop into Rumi’s timeless poem The Guest House as a reminder that every feeling is a visitor, not a life sentence.You’ll leave grounded, steady, and anchored in the truth: you are not the guest — you are the house. And the house always stands.

Nervous System Resets for AnxietyAnxiety isn’t just in your head — it’s a full-body hostile takeover.Amy (the amygdala): slams the panic button.Carl (the prefrontal cortex): gets kicked out of the office.Hippo (the hippocampus): pulls out every embarrassing receipt from 7th grade.Simba (the sympathetic system): floors the gas like you’re about to wrestle a bear.In this episode, we go full nerd and full feral. I break down what’s actually happening in your brain and body when anxiety hijacks you: limbic system alarms, HPA axis cortisol surges, vagus nerve chill resets — explained in plain language.Then I hand you six science-backed nervous system resets you can actually use in the middle of a spiral. Think:Grounding tricks that hijack Amy’s micCold water hacks that scuba dive panic awayProgressive muscle relaxation that tucks Simba in for a napPlus more tools that double as real-time circuit breakersEach reset comes with the science, the step-by-step, and a translation you’ll actually remember at 2 a.m.By the end, you’ll have a fridge-worthy list of anxiety resets that pull you back from time-traveling brain bullshit and drop you into the only place you actually have power: right the fuck here.

Affirmations That Don’t Suck Ass Balls: Anxiety EditionThis episode gives you two things:The science of anxiety — how your amygdala (Amy) hijacks your nervous system, kicks your prefrontal cortex (Carl) offline, and drags you into past regrets or future catastrophes. I break down why your brain time-travels, why it feels so physical, and how your vagus nerve (Vega) is the key to getting calm again.Actual affirmations that don’t suck ass balls — no sugar-coated “I am enough” garbage. These are funny, grounding one-liners you can actually use in the middle of a spiral. They’re designed to snap you out of anxiety’s bullshit and anchor you back into the present moment.By the end, you’ll walk away with a set of science-backed affirmations you can repeat, write on a Post-it, or scream into your steering wheel the next time your brain tries to time-travel you into chaos.

This isn’t your average soft-and-sparkly meditation. This is for the moments when you don’t trust yourself, when you’re second-guessing every damn decision, and when you’re convinced everyone else has it figured out but you.In this guided meditation, we’ll use 4–6 breath and 4–7–8 breath to calm your nervous system, then drop into a visualization of the compass that lives in your chest. You’ll steady the needle, ask it the questions that matter, and anchor trust back into your body.By the end, you’ll remember: your body already knows the way. Every breath is a rep. Every rep builds self-trust.

I used to think I couldn’t trust myself — so much that I paid $10K a month to a coach to make every decision for me. What I didn’t realize was that self-trust isn’t a mindset issue, it’s a nervous system issue.In this episode, I share how being a 2/4 Generator with emotional authority in Human Design and understanding the vagus nerve as your second brain helped me stop outsourcing my power. Then I’ll walk you through six science-backed resets you can use anytime you’re spiraling:Voice memo dumpEmotional wave waitGut-check breathSomatic sway testMicro-rep sprintsPush + pull qigongThese are the nervous system reps that build trust in your own gut, your own rhythm, your own life. No more second-guessing, no outsourcing — just you proving to yourself that you can handle it.(For more info on Human design, check out https://humandesignblueprint.com/

This episode is all about building self-trust and giving you affirmations that don’t suck ass balls.I used to believe I couldn’t trust myself to make a single decision — so much so that I paid ten grand a month to a shady “expert” who convinced me I was helpless. Spoiler: she was wrong. This episode is your crash course in building self-trust when your brain is screaming you’re screwing it all up — with affirmations that don’t suck ass balls.