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346: Pete's A John

346: Pete's A John

2022-09-2651:22

What class would you invent? How do I know if someone recognizes Pizza John or not? How do I let one of my students know I recognize Snizza John? What do I do when a student tells me I look like I eat trail mix? Is time just an increase in entropy? How do you handle pizza emergencies? What beverage do we leave out on Pizzamas Eve? Hank and John Green have answers! If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com.Join us for monthly livestreams and an exclusive weekly podcast at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn.Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn
345: Did He Have Rats?

345: Did He Have Rats?

2022-09-1945:241

What's up with Ryan Reynolds? Why do green anoles like singing more than brown anoles? Is stomach acid inside our bodies or outside our tubes? How do bats aim poop? How do La Croixs get their flavor? What is the beer of champagnes? Hank and John Green have answers! If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com.Join us for monthly livestreams and an exclusive weekly podcast at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn.Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn
344: A Film of Scuzz

344: A Film of Scuzz

2022-09-0546:324

Would being caught just before hitting the ground still hurt? Is it bad that the Earth is spinning faster? Where does the air inside of bell peppers come from? Why do people use pot lids as cymbals? How do you get better at trivia?  Hank and John Green have answers!If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com.Join us for monthly livestreams and an exclusive weekly podcast at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn.Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn
343: Raccoonanity

343: Raccoonanity

2022-08-2948:412

How often does the moon go around the Earth? Are bugs alright? How do I not cry at rude customers? When's the last time you had a good cry? What is the animal version of "humanity"? Hank and John Green have answers!If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com.Join us for monthly livestreams and an exclusive weekly podcast at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn.Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn
How do I house sit for 100 ducks? How do I move a tectonic plate? How do power lines explode balloons but not birds? Why are so many US products not available in Canada? Hank and John Green have answers!If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com.Join us for monthly livestreams and an exclusive weekly podcast at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn.Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn
What would happen if a day was a minute? What if an asteroid hit a volcano that was ready to erupt? Would a rocket and a bullet go through Jupiter's center? How many countries would Earth have if they were all the size of Vatican City? Would you tell anyone if you found oil on Mars? Could a person eat a whole cloud? Hank Green and Randall Munroe have answers!If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com.Join us for monthly livestreams and an exclusive weekly podcast at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn.Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn
340: Blame the Bird

340: Blame the Bird

2022-08-0847:453

How do I have my writing read apart from me? Is the Earth really round? How do I find out about food recalls? What would Earth be like if trees had never evolved? Why are the planets different at different distances from the sun? Hank and John Green have answers!If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com.Join us for monthly livestreams and an exclusive weekly podcast at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn.Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn
How does something absorb light? How do I handle losing four marks? Is it okay to disagree with movie reviews? Can I just take ice cream? Is it bad luck to open an umbrella in a car? Hank Green and Brennan Lee Mulligan have answers!If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com.Join us for monthly livestreams and an exclusive weekly podcast at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn.Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn
How do I respond to decade old bread texts? How do woodpeckers not get concussions? Would Earth's destruction be bad for Mars? Why is it so hard to get the last cereal square on the spoon? How was soap invented? What would Earth look like from space if  it never had life on it? Hank and John Green have answers!If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com.Join us for monthly livestreams and an exclusive weekly podcast at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn.Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn
337: Reserved for Mateys

337: Reserved for Mateys

2022-07-1845:314

What's up with all the giraffe sex? Why is it easier to keep a moving bicycle upright? How does my stomach growl? Why were dinosaurs so big? What are some interesting skills to have? Hank and John Green have answers!If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com.Join us for monthly livestreams and an exclusive weekly podcast at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn.Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn
336: Welcome to Wendy's

336: Welcome to Wendy's

2022-06-2745:023

How do I learn to fart? Do I dream of invisible sounds? Can you use a vacuum inside a vacuum? What does "keep an ear out" mean? Why are hardcover books so expensive? Hank and John Green have answers!If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com.Join us for monthly livestreams and an exclusive weekly podcast at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn.Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn
335: Just Boil It

335: Just Boil It

2022-06-2052:391

Why is the Earth's interior still molten? How do I tell someone I don't like orange soda? What do I write in the yearbook for someone who failed my class? What do I do with Too Much Peanut Butter? How does a 14-year-old make money? Hank and John Green have answers!If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com.Join us for monthly livestreams and an exclusive weekly podcast at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn.Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn
334: The Nose of A Mouse

334: The Nose of A Mouse

2022-05-3150:384

How do we know what happens in black holes? How do I make small talk with an old guy? What's the best plant for a typewriter-shaped flower pot? Why do we have capital letters but not numbers? What's the difference between democrats and republicans? Why do heat injuries make you more prone to future heat injuries? Hank and John Green have answers!If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com.Join us for monthly livestreams and an exclusive weekly podcast at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn.Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn
333: Crabulo.us

333: Crabulo.us

2022-05-2346:573

Do I address a mis-sent crab flyer? Could we open some terrariums on the moon? What does "run of the mill" mean? How will people on Mars maintain their microbiome? Do snakes need to stretch? Is there a purpose to having music around ad breaks? Hank and John Green have answers!If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com.Join us for monthly livestreams and an exclusive weekly podcast at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn.Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn
332: As It Transpired

332: As It Transpired

2022-05-1645:13

What grade would we get as an alien's homework? Was your feud over YouTube comment signatures? How do you write an email? Can trees make clouds? How do I make it to the bathroom when the middle seater sleeps? Is it okay to buy used books? Hank and John Green have answers!If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com.Join us for monthly livestreams and an exclusive weekly podcast at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn.Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn
How do I handle a loved one's astronaut aspirations? Should I pick dandelions? How do I sound more cultured? What is a "vibe" scientifically speaking? How do you think of new jokes? Why can't we send our garbage into space? Hank and John Green have answers!If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com.Join us for monthly livestreams and an exclusive weekly podcast at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn.Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn
Can I use a mother's day coupon on myself? How much of a dollar bill do you have to have to use it? Why is the computer mouse cursor tilted? How do we know Alpha Centauri is the closest star? Can a smell be solidified? What does my dog know about mirrors? Will a badger respect my pee? Hank Green has answers!Music breaks in this episode:"Fall of a Raindrop" by Calm Shores"Soda Stream Jingle" by somebody in the '90s who probably got paid a LOT"The Bratwurst Song" by Stationary Sign"Street Life Educations" by  Off Cuts If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com.Join us for monthly livestreams and an exclusive weekly podcast at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn.Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn Note: The podcast ad for the IMPACT app is unscripted and being recorded live. It may contain some slight differences. Please visit https://impact.interactivebrokers.com/ for full details of products and services. Interactive Brokers, LLC member FINRA/SIPC.The projections or other information generated by IMPACT app regarding the likelihood of various investment outcomes are hypothetical in nature, do not reflect actual investment results and are not guarantees of future results. Please note that results may vary with use of the tool over time.The paid ad host experiences and testimonials within the Podcast may not be representative of the experiences of other customers and are not to be considered guarantees of future performance or success. The opinions provided within the ad belong to the host alone.
What do you picture while reading? How often should a woodpecker poop? What does the spicy cough demand? What do I do about workplace ants? Can a friend be a +1? How do I know if a job is not for me? John Green and Rosianna Halse Rojas have answers!If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com.Join us for monthly livestreams and an exclusive weekly podcast at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn.Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn
Do bees know what they're doing? Do you worry that you'll run out of thoughts? What is the wildest thing some rando has ever said to you? Can my weekend sleep schedule be different? Why are advertisements so annoying? How do ships traveling at half speed save fuel? What are the implications of a tiny plastic baby? How do you do anything when the world is ending? John Green has answers! Music breaks in this episode:"Dear Hank and John Theme" by Gunnarolla"Stolen Hearts" by T. Morri"Becoming Mr. Bossa" by Redeemin' If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com.Join us for monthly livestreams and an exclusive weekly podcast at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn.Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn Note: The podcast ad for the IMPACT app is unscripted and being recorded live. It may contain some slight differences. Please visit https://impact.interactivebrokers.com/ for full details of products and services. Interactive Brokers, LLC member FINRA/SIPC.The projections or other information generated by IMPACT app regarding the likelihood of various investment outcomes are hypothetical in nature, do not reflect actual investment results and are not guarantees of future results. Please note that results may vary with use of the tool over time.The paid ad host experiences and testimonials within the Podcast may not be representative of the experiences of other customers and are not to be considered guarantees of future performance or success. The opinions provided within the ad belong to the host alone. 
How are art eras named? How do I feel about a somewhat small accomplishment? How do move on from gnomes? Do you like Latin? John Green and Sarah Urist Green have answers!If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com.Join us for monthly livestreams and an exclusive weekly podcast at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn.Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn
Comments (266)

Kim Hawko Vitiello

We went from no ads to over 5 minutes of ads at the beginning band MORE in the middle. Are you kidding me

Sep 8th
Reply

Ella Brooks

I’ll always imagine my meals being dropped in paper bags from now on, this is the duo I didn’t know I needed <3 much love to you both, you’re amazing!

Aug 8th
Reply

agustin venegas

"you may not have stake n' shake, so think (other chain fast food that doesn't exist outside the US)" Hank....

Aug 3rd
Reply

Katie N.

Add the mouse tilt at minute 15 to the list of Mandela effects. I could have sworn it tilted right 😳

May 3rd
Reply

Zach Burkitt

Moral superiority and a sack, is worth a sack.

Apr 7th
Reply

Shari Rada

Wow!

Dec 21st
Reply

Tass

backed up the podcast to listen to John say "I adore you" a second time, v cute

Dec 14th
Reply

agustin venegas

Anyone else went to google Nuthatch bird to check how one looks as if i could see those birds?

Dec 10th
Reply

ID10329342

What if you tether the flashlight so you can pull it back??

Dec 10th
Reply

Ria

Hank: *makes a pun* John: Well, it's been a good run but I quit.

Nov 16th
Reply

Josh Wolabaugh

this is an hour long and the first 10% is just the same commercial twice, that I've already heard 13 times other places because nobody is listening to this that isn't already hearing Hank and John in other sources.

Nov 11th
Reply

Tass

this episode is ludicrous and I have laughed so hard

Nov 9th
Reply

Katelyn3666

That # 4 choice of John's....

Oct 10th
Reply

Cayla Hardwicke

finally read my project for awesome message 😊

Sep 27th
Reply

BoB Tubocass

Fluffy is the name of the three dogs collectively. They didn't need to be addressed individually. I am surprised John didn't bring up his expertise on conjoined twins.

Sep 27th
Reply

Masada

me: *makes and engages with international relations content, plans to expand* oh no

Sep 20th
Reply

Ria

John about to force people to get married just so he can go to the wedding.

Aug 20th
Reply

John Louis Anton

Skip to 42:02 for the sneeze question!

Aug 3rd
Reply

Randal Swanson

At the Water Museum buy a box of water at the gift shop.

Jul 6th
Reply

Sonja Rún Magnúsdóttir

"meat is meat" "yeah I agree" this is the intellectual content I've been craving 😂

Jul 3rd
Reply
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