Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship

In this milestone 150th episode of Dear Nina, we’re diving deep into friendship and community with siblings and co-directors Rebecca Davis and Pete Davis, the team behind the Netflix documentary Join or Die: A film about why you should join a club and why the fate of America depends on it.Inspired by the groundbreaking work of political scientist Robert Putnam (Bowling Alone), Join or Die explores the powerful link between social connection, the health of our democracy, and our mental and physical health on an individual level.If you’ve been feeling stuck, isolated, or unsure where to begin when it comes to finding your people and more meaning in your life, this episode is a place to start. HIGHLIGHTS:Why so many people feel they don’t have enough friends or diverse friendships.The difference between community and friendship--and why we need both.What “social capital” actually means and why it affects everything from your mental health to the quality of your local government.Why loneliness isn’t just a personal issue, it’s a civic one.How we went from a culture of joiners to one of solo scrollers, and how we can change that.Practical tips on joining or starting something meaningful, even if you're intimidated. LINKS & RESOURCESWatch the film: Join or DieHost a screening in your community! Find out how on the film’s website.Listen to previous episode mentioned #135: The Hyperlocal Friendship ChallengeAlso #138: The Neighborhood Village and How Community is Different From Friendship: with Seth D. KaplanMeet Rebecca Davis & Pete Davis, co-directors and co-producersRebecca Davis was a senior producer with NBC News for nearly a decade, where her work focused on social movements, environmental and economic justice, and community innovators. Pete Davis is a writer and civic advocate and a former student of Robert Putnam's. He is the author of Dedicated: The Case for Commitment in An Age of Infinite Browsing. He is the co-founder of the Democracy Policy Network, a policy organization focused on raising up ideas that deepen democracy. ALL THE DEAR NINA LINKS + CONTACT INFO📢 How to promote your service, business, or book on Dear Nina📱 Subscribe to my newsletter “Conversations About Friendship” on Substack❤️ Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, & the Dear Nina Facebook group📪 Ask an anonymous friendship question🔎 Want to work with me on your podcast, your friendships, or need another link? That’s probably here.This week's sponsor: Blue Box Press with Lexi Blake's newest novel, BUILT TO LAST. Visit https://www.lexiblake.net/Our Sponsors:* Check out Armoire: https://armoire.style/DEARNINAAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Welcome to the Dear Nina Friendship Challenge for June: Ask a friend for a favor.Why? Asking a friend for a favor demonstrates trust and intimacy. It helps your friend feel closer to you merely because you asked, and this will strengthen the friendship. Unfortunately, people really struggle asking for help, even for the smallest of favors. This month I want you to practice this important skill!I also ask you to consider if you struggle asking friends for help because you're afraid people will then ask you for help. That's how friendship works! We have to be inconvenienced sometimes for friends and community, which is good for relationships AND for society.I packed a lot into a 12-minute episode. I hope you'll join me in the June Dear Nina Friendship Challenge.LINKS & RESOURCESJoin the Dear Nina Facebook Community to discuss wins and struggles from all the monthly challenges.Previous Monthly Challenges (Jan–May 2025) are all linked at dearnina.substack.com.The episode I mentioned with Gretchen RubinALL THE DEAR NINA LINKS + CONTACT INFO📢 How to promote your service, business, or book on Dear Nina📱 Subscribe to my newsletter “Conversations About Friendship” on Substack❤️ Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, & the Dear Nina Facebook group📪 Ask an anonymous friendship question🔎 Want to work with me on your podcast, your friendships, or need another link? That’s probably here.This week's sponsor: Blue Box Press with Lexi Blake's newest novel, BUILT TO LAST. Visit https://www.lexiblake.net/Our Sponsors:* Check out Armoire: https://armoire.style/DEARNINAAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

I sat down with fifth-generation etiquette expert Daniel Post Senning of The Emily Post Institute to explore how classic (and modern!) manners can strengthen and even rescue our adult friendships. We discussed using etiquette for group chat issues, RSVP blunders, office friendship confusion, misuse of AI, bringing up kids' cringe posts, cocktail party escapes, staying friends when your kids' friendship falters, and friendship breakups.You don't want to miss this one!LINKS & RESOURCESEmily Post's Business Etiquette is the newest book from Dan and LizzieThe Emily Post Institute on InstagramDan and Lizzie's podcast, Awesome EtiquetteWe referred to one of my earliest episodes! #2 "When Your Friend's Kid is Being Mean to Your Kid"MEET DANIEL POST SENNING: Daniel Post Senning, great-great-grandson of Emily Post, is co-president with his cousin, Lizzie Post, at the Emily Post Institute. He manages the company’s training programs, has authored and co-authored many books on etiquette, covering topics from business to digital manners, and delivers seminars and speeches on these topics around the world. An active spokesperson for the Institute, he regularly speaks with media outlets about business, technology, and dining etiquette. Daniel has appeared on The Today Show, The History Channel, and ESPN, and has been interviewed by publications including the New York Times, GQ, Time Magazine, and the Wall Street Journal. He most enjoys answering questions as a co-host on the Institute’s weekly podcast, Awesome Etiquette, from his home in Duxbury, Vermont, where he lives with his wife, Puja, and their children, Anisha, Arya, and William. ALL THE DEAR NINA LINKS + CONTACT INFO📢 How to promote your service, business, or book on Dear Nina📱 Subscribe to my newsletter “Conversations About Friendship” on Substack❤️ Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, & the Dear Nina Facebook group📪 Ask an anonymous friendship question🔎 Want to work with me on your podcast, your friendships, or need another link? That’s probably here.This week's sponsor: Blue Box Press with Lexi Blake's newest novel, BUILT TO LAST. Visit https://www.lexiblake.net/Our Sponsors:* Check out Armoire: https://armoire.style/DEARNINAAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

In this short solo episode, I consider why some people hesitate to tell friends about positive events like a promotion, a published piece, or a personal milestone or achievement. Likely due to cultural conditioning, we worry it will come off as bragging. I think it's a missed opportunity to feel closer to friends when all good news is kept under wraps.Not sharing can also have a cost. When friends learn about our news secondhand, it can create distance and misunderstandings.Vulnerability is a key to closeness, and sharing GOOD news is an excellent way to make yourself vulnerable.Equally as important in this episode: I discuss receiving your friends' good news with graciousness, curiosity, and shared joy if you want friends to keep you in the loop. When a friend shares something exciting, offer clear enthusiasm and ask a follow-up question!LINKS AND RESOURCESHear me on NPR Life Kit: "How to Keep Old Friends" Apple. Spotify.Join the Conversation: In the Dear Nina Facebook group we swap friendship wins and dilemmas.Episode 146 of Dear Nina on not overthinking in your friendships and tolerating uncertainty.ALL THE DEAR NINA LINKS + CONTACT INFO📢 How to promote your service, business, or book on Dear Nina📱 Subscribe to my newsletter “Conversations About Friendship” on Substack❤️ Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, & the Dear Nina Facebook group📪 Ask an anonymous friendship question🔎 Want to work with me on your podcast, your friendships, or need another link? That’s probably here.This week's sponsor: Blue Box Press with Lexi Blake's newest novel, BUILT TO LAST. Visit https://www.lexiblake.net/Our Sponsors:* Check out Armoire: https://armoire.style/DEARNINAAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

If you’ve ever reread a text 10 times, filled in every silence with worst-case scenarios, or found yourself leaving too many hangouts with friends regretting what you said, this conversation is for you. Psychologist Dr. Jackie Henry and I discuss tools to stop overthinking your every friendship move and learn to tolerate uncertainty in your relationships. We rarely know what someone else is thinking, and we need to stop assuming we do. Wouldn't it be refreshing to just be in your friendships and not feel like you're "performing" to always say and do the exact "right" thing? Dr. Jackie offers Dear Nina listeners practical tips for getting out of your head and back into your life so your friendships can thrive.KEY TAKEAWAYSSilence usually means “busy,” not “they secretly hate me.”Budget your “energy bucks.” Rumination is a waste of energy; spend wisely.Constant overthinking can create distance between friends and lead to miscommunication, anxiety, and the fear of judgment.Work to tolerate the unknown: there's power in letting things unfold naturally in friendships.Lead with curiosity. A simple “Hey, when’s good to chat?” beats the story your telling yourself about why someone hasn't responded.LINKS & RESOURCESDr. Jackie Henry’s Substack: Less Thinking, More Living The Dear Nina monthly friendship challenges. (The April one was mentioned in this episode.)The TikTok account I mentioned about recounting awkward moments. @amymaurercreel MEET DR. JACKIEDr. Jackie Henry is a psychologist, writer, and founder of Less Thinking, More Living—a platform dedicated to helping people stop overthinking and start fully embracing life. Based in the Twin Cities, she also works as a wellness consultant and has a private therapy practice. Dr. Jackie combines humor, heart, and relatable insights to help individuals navigate life with greater ease and presence. Outside of work, she's at the cabin, playing board games, or enjoying happy hour with her husband, four daughters, and their small but mighty dog. You can find her on Instagram @dr.jackiehenry or on Substack at Less Thinking, More Living.ALL THE DEAR NINA LINKS + CONTACT INFO📢 How to promote your service, business, or book on Dear Nina📱 Subscribe to my newsletter “Conversations About Friendship” on Substack❤️ Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, & the Dear Nina Facebook group📪 Ask an anonymous friendship question🔎 Want to work with me on your podcast, your friendships, or need another link? That’s probably here.This week's sponsor: Blue Box Press with Lexi Blake's newest novel, BUILT TO LAST. Visit https://www.lexiblake.net/Our Sponsors:* Check out Armoire: https://armoire.style/DEARNINAAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Meghan Keane, author of Party of One: Be Your Own Best Life Partner, says one of the top complaints single people have about their married friends is that they feel like a problem to be solved. Another is that their dating lives are the sole focus of a married friend’s attention. Meghan joins me to unpack “singlism,” the subtle (and not-so-subtle) ways society sidelines single adults. We discuss concrete steps couples can use to include their single friends, the reality of friendship after life transitions, and good basic social kindnesses everyone can use for ALL of their friendships. Whether you’re partnered or single, this conversation will sharpen your friendship skills and remind you that friends like to be asked about all aspects of their lives (not just their dating lives, their "mom life," their careers, and so on).HIGHLIGHTSHow singlism, a term coined by Dr. Bella DePaulo, is often based in myths and harmful stereotypesWhy singleness isn't something to be solved by a partnered friendsRules for married/partners friends when it comes to their single friends (don't treat dating life as entertainment, help with mundane life tasks, celebrate accomplishments, hang out one on one, include in larger plans).Why working through conflict is a sign of a deep friendshipWhat married people can learn from single people about maintaining strong social tiesLINKS & RESOURCESMeghan's book, Party of One: Be Your Own Best Life PartnerFind Meghan on Instagram @damekeaneWe referred to previous Dear Nina episodes with Dr. Marisa Franco, Gretchen Rubin, and Ruchi KovalMEET MEGHAN KEANEMeghan Keane is the founder and supervising editor for NPR's Life Kit, which brings listeners advice and actionable information about personal finances, health, parenting, relationships and more. She is responsible for the editorial vision of Life Kit, which aims to serve NPR's larger mission of public service. Prior to founding Life Kit, Keane was a producer for NPR's award winning podcast Invisibilia. There, she produced long form stories about understanding human behavior and the invisible forces that shape our lives. She reported stories about the intersection of positivity, grief, and Disneyland and another story about a woman obsessed with her daydream world. Keane is also a founding producer of NPR's TED Radio Hour, which has consistently been one of NPR's top podcasts since its debut. Keane holds a B.S. journalism degree from Emerson College and is a native of the Washington, D.C. area.ALL THE DEAR NINA LINKS + CONTACT INFO📢 How to promote your service, business, or book on Dear Nina📱 Subscribe to my newsletter “Conversations About Friendship” on Substack❤️ Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, & the Dear Nina Facebook group📪 Ask an anonymous friendship question🔎 Want to work with me on your podcast, your friendships, or need another link? That’s probably here. 🙏 Support the Show:Love what you’re hearing? Share this episode with a friend or leave a review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. Every bit helps us bring more meaningful conversations your way.This week's sponsor: Blue Box Press with Lexi Blake's newest novel, BUILT TO LAST. Visit https://www.lexiblake.net/Our Sponsors:* Check out Armoire: https://armoire.style/DEARNINAAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Whether you’re hoping to upgrade a casual acquaintance, breathe life into a longstanding friendship, or accommodate a friend whose season of life recently shifted, a venue swap can work magic without big declarations or heavy planning.Welcome to the Dear Nina Friendship Challenge for May: Pick a newer friend or an old friend you'd like to feel closer to and initiate a change in where (or how) you hang out.Do you normally text, but never talk on the phone? Try a call! Do you walk once in awhile, but never go out for lunch? Suggest a new restaurant in town. I provide more ideas in the episode PLUS all the reasons why a venue change is so powerful for deepening new friendships and revitalizing old ones.Ready to try this powerful friendship "upgrade?" Hit play, choose your venue swap, and let me know how it goes!LINKS & RESOURCESJoin the Dear Nina Facebook Community to discuss wins and struggles from all the monthly challenges.Previous Monthly Challenges (Jan–Apr 2025) are all linked at dearnina.substack.com. ALL THE DEAR NINA LINKS + CONTACT INFO📢 How to promote your service, business, or book on Dear Nina📱 Subscribe to my newsletter “Conversations About Friendship” on Substack❤️ Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, & the Dear Nina Facebook group📪 Ask an anonymous friendship question🔎 Want to work with me on your podcast, your friendships, or need another link? That’s probably here. 🙏 Support the Show:Love what you’re hearing? Share this episode with a friend or leave a review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. Every bit helps us bring more meaningful conversations your way.This week's sponsor: Blue Box Press with Lexi Blake's newest novel, BUILT TO LAST. Visit https://www.lexiblake.net/Our Sponsors:* Check out Armoire: https://armoire.style/DEARNINAAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

In this powerful episode of Dear Nina, I am joined by bestselling author Harlan Cohen to explore the truth about rejection, risk, and the myths we carry into adulthood about what friendship “should” look like. We dive into the Law of Rejection—a concept that can radically shift how you approach your relationships. Whether you're 18 or 88, accepting that we cannot control how others respond to our desire for friendship will serve you well. Friendship requires some risks, and knowing that rejection comes with the territory will allow you to take those risks.Whether you're always the planner, the first to text, or the one who feels left out of the group chat, this conversation will reframe your perspective and give you permission to stop taking every unmet friendship expectation so personally. Plus, you will love Harlan if you've never heard him before. He's the best, and he provided me a needed wake-up call around my own fears of rejection.TOPICS WE COVERED:Flipping our fears of being left out or let down in friendships into something more empoweringHow to stop testing your friends and start communicatingHarlan's “people, places, patience” formula for building connectionWhy putting yourself in “low-barrier” places is a lifelong strategy for connectionThe pressure we put on friends and ourselves to meet unspoken expectationsWhat to do if you're always the one initiating plansHarlan's full-circle roommate story that will make you smile and remind you that we never know what the other person in our "friendship narrative" is really thinking LINKS & RESOURCES:Harlan’s College Success Coaching Program Best First YearHarlan's episode with his freshman year roommateYou will love Harlan on Instagram and TikTok and YouTube!MEET HARLAN COHEN: Harlan is the New York Times bestselling author of The Naked Roommate: And 107 Other Issues You Might Run Into In College and six other titles (over 1 million copies in print). His social media accounts have over 1.5 million followers and he hosts a popular podcast. He is the founder of Best First Year, a college success coaching program for students and parents. Harlan lives in Chicago, Illinois with his wife and three children.ALL THE DEAR NINA LINKS + CONTACT INFO📢 How to promote your service, business, or book on Dear Nina📱 Subscribe to my newsletter “Conversations About Friendship” on Substack❤️ Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, & the Dear Nina Facebook group📪 Ask an anonymous friendship question🔎 Want to work with me on your podcast, your friendships, or need another link? That’s probably here. 🙏 Support the Show:Love what you’re hearing? Share this episode with a friend or leave a review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. Every bit helps us bring more meaningful conversations your way.This week's sponsor: Blue Box Press with Lexi Blake's newest novel, BUILT TO LAST. Visit https://www.lexiblake.net/Our Sponsors:* Check out Armoire: https://armoire.style/DEARNINAAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

What happens to our friendships when our phones are always within reach for us to "quickly check something" or "quickly answer a text?" It’s time to be honest about how available we are to everyone else while spending time with friends and how these distractions are harming our friendships. (I include myself in "we!") Is anyone else experiencing smart phone fatigue?I spoke with author, Katherine Martinko, whose book Childhood Unplugged and Substack newsletter, The Analog Family, focuses on how to take back our presence, one small shift at a time. This episode isn’t an anti-tech rant—it’s a nuanced conversation about building a life and fostering friendships offline with intentionality. We explore what’s lost when we let phones dominate our social time and what’s gained when we reclaim our attention and presence. All issues I need as much help with as anyone else!TOPICS WE COVERED:Screen time isn't just a kid issue—it's an adult problem, tooWhy undivided attention is one of the most generous gifts in friendshipBuilding a richer, more soul-nourishing life offline is the key to putting your phone down more often.Practical tips for reducing phone use during social gatheringsSmall changes that make a huge differenceWhy 7 minutes into a conversation might be the tipping point for going deeper (if you don’t pick up your phone!)What it really takes to “fix your analog life first”LINKS & RESOURCES:One of my favorite essays by Katherine: “Fix Your Analog Life First: It's a Prerequisite for Curbing Screen Time”Jonathan Haidt’s The Anxious GenerationCal Newport’s work on digital minimalism and deep workSherry Turkle’s Alone TogetherErin Loechner’s The Opt-Out Family MEET KATHERINE MARTINKO: Katherine is a writer, editor, and speaker. She is the author of Childhood Unplugged: Practical Advice to Get Kids Off Screens and Find Balance (2023) and creator of a fast-growing Substack newsletter called The Analog Family. Katherine is a speaker on behalf of Jonathan Haidt's Anxious Generation campaign. She is a regular contributor to the Globe and Mail, Canada’s largest newspaper, and appears regularly on national radio, TV, talk shows, and podcasts, including CBC The National and Global TV. Katherine lives with her family in Ontario, Canada. See her website here.ALL THE DEAR NINA LINKS + CONTACT INFO📢 How to promote your service, business, or book on Dear Nina📱 Subscribe to my newsletter “Conversations About Friendship” on Substack❤️ Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, & the Dear Nina Facebook group📪 Ask an anonymous friendship question🔎 Want to work with me on your podcast, your friendships, or need another link? That’s probably here. 🙏 Support the Show:Love what you’re hearing? Share this episode with a friend or leave a review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. Every bit helps us bring more meaningful conversations your way.This week's sponsor: Blue Box Press with Lexi Blake's newest novel, BUILT TO LAST. Visit https://www.lexiblake.net/Our Sponsors:* Check out Armoire: https://armoire.style/DEARNINAAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

It's a very special episode of Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship dedicated to the much-discussed and debated friendship triangle in White Lotus Season 3 created by Mike White.The friendship trio of Jaclyn, Kate, and Laurie has captivated TV viewers for the last two months. Similarly, Rebekah Jacobs (Dear Nina's assistant producer) and I have been texting and talking between episodes. Now that the season finale has aired, we shared all the lessons we think Jaclyn, Kate, and Laurie imparted on the world. Even their mistakes gave us plenty of friendship advice to ponder.A big point that Rebekah and I agree on: Not all friendship triangles are bad! YES, even this particular trio has us defending friendship triangles. No friendship "shape" is good or bad. How individuals behave creates healthy or unhealthy friendships!WHITE LOTUS INSPIRED FRIENDSHIP ADVICE WE DISCUSSED:Think carefully before sharing information with a friend. (Kate telling Laurie about Valentin)Be vulnerable sooner than you think. (Laurie didn't have to wait until the last night of the trip.)Be direct, not passive-aggressive. And don't assume friends can read your mind.Apologize and accept apologies when they're genuineFriends don't always have to be on the same page about everythingGive your friends grace to mess up/ let some things go Friends are not necessarily mirrors of each otherAllow friends to change and growKnow the difference between gossip vs. genuine care and concernGive old friendships some of the fun, ease, and benefit of the doubt we give fresh, new friendships (Chelsea/Chloe vs. the trio of old friends)Don't a friend to meet every needTruth daggers hurt. You can be honest with your friends without being cruel.LINKS MENTIONED IN THE EPISODE:You're the Only One I Can Tell by Deborah TannenEpisode 136: Your 3-5 Closest FriendsALL THE DEAR NINA LINKS + CONTACT INFO📢 How to promote your service, business, or book on Dear Nina📱 Subscribe to my newsletter “Conversations About Friendship” on Substack❤️ Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, & the Dear Nina Facebook group📪 Ask an anonymous friendship question🔎 Want to work with me on your podcast, your friendships, or need another link? That’s probably here. This week's sponsor: Blue Box Press with Lexi Blake's newest novel, BUILT TO LAST. Visit https://www.lexiblake.net/Our Sponsors:* Check out Armoire: https://armoire.style/DEARNINAAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

The Dear Nina Friendship Challenge for April is about the sometimes tricky topic of friends' birthdays. The challenge itself is simple and the easiest so far in 2025. I'm encouraging listeners to actively seek out friends' birthdays so you don't have to rely on social media to know the date. Of course the next step is to acknowledge friends on their birthdays, again not only relying solely social media. The rest of the episode explores the emotional complexities surrounding birthdays, comparing how other friends' birthdays get celebrated, and why I believe in planning your own parties. While talking I realized we need a part two of this topic because I introduced many more questions than answers. I'd love to hear your thoughts and if celebrating friends' birthdays and your own brings up any feelings. I definitely shared some! Reach out any time at ninabadzin@gmail.com or anonymously here. Find the past friendship challenges here. ALL THE DEAR NINA LINKS + CONTACT INFO📢 How to promote your service, business, or book on Dear Nina📱 Subscribe to my newsletter “Conversations About Friendship” on Substack❤️ Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, & the Dear Nina Facebook group📪 Ask an anonymous friendship question🔎 Want to work with me on your podcast, your friendships, or need another link? That’s probably here. This week's sponsor: Blue Box Press with Lexi Blake's newest novel, BUILT TO LAST. Visit https://www.lexiblake.net/Our Sponsors:* Check out Armoire: https://armoire.style/DEARNINAAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Welcome to Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship. I'm your host, Nina Badzin. I've been writing about friendship for over 10 years and podcasting about it for almost four. This episode on how to start a podcast might not be for you. So, send it to your friend who has been thinking about starting a podcast! I break down the process, explaining each aspect from concept, podcast art, music, format, equipment, recording, editing, hosting your episodes, marketing, realistic expectations for your friends' interest, realistic exceptions for how much a guest will share. All in less than 35 minutes! Links to everything I mentioned in the episode:My podcast strategy sessions: Here you go!Podcast art and episode graphics: Canva.com Basic equipment: Microphone, mic arm, headphones, Equipment I added later: mixer , camera, streaming light Recording, editing, and social media clips: Riverside.fmMy favorite editing software: DescriptSound cleanup: Auphonic.comA hosting suggestion(my first host)---BuzzsproutAnother hosting suggestion (my current host)--RedCircleOther hosting suggestions: Spotify for Creators, Substack ALL THE DEAR NINA LINKS + CONTACT INFO📢 How to promote your service, business, or book on Dear Nina📱 Subscribe to my newsletter “Conversations About Friendship” on Substack❤️ Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, & the Dear Nina Facebook group📪 Ask an anonymous friendship question🔎 Want to work with me on your podcast, your friendships, or need another link? That’s probably here. This week's sponsor: Blue Box Press with Lexi Blake's newest novel, BUILT TO LAST. Visit https://www.lexiblake.net/Our Sponsors:* Check out Armoire: https://armoire.style/DEARNINAAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Your neighborhood community might be the most overlooked place for social connection. However, it’s essential to understand the difference between community relationships and friendships. They are not the same!I’m joined by Seth D. Kaplan, author of FRAGILE NEIGHBORHOODS: Repairing American Society One Zip Code at a Time, to discuss the importance of social health in fostering community connections.We delve into the impact of technology, the decline of neighborhood schools, and policies that impact community disconnection and inequality, while also offering practical steps for individuals and cities to enhance social engagement and rebuild neighborhood ties.In this conversation, Seth Kaplan and I also contrast community relationships with friendships. We discuss the importance of being part of a community, the decay of middle-ring relationships, and the role of participation (showing up!) in fostering a supportive environment. Kaplan shares research along with personal anecdotes and ideas about community engagement. I spent time dwelling on my favorite concept—the gemach—a communal lending system that exemplifies the spirit of cooperation and support.Meet Seth D. KaplanSeth D. Kaplan, a leading expert on fragile states, societies, and communities, is the author of Fragile Neighborhoods: Repairing American Society, One Zip Code at a Time (Little, Brown Spark 2023). He is a Professorial Lecturer in the Paul H. Nitze School of Advanced International Studies (SAIS) at Johns Hopkins University, Senior Adviser for the Institute for Integrated Transitions (IFIT), and consultant to organizations such as the World Bank, U.S. State Department, United States Institute of Peace, and OECD. Find Seth on LinkedIn and on his website.ALL THE DEAR NINA LINKS + CONTACT INFO📢 How to promote your service, business, or book on Dear Nina📱 Subscribe to my newsletter “Conversations About Friendship” on Substack❤️ Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, & the Dear Nina Facebook group📪 Ask an anonymous friendship question🔎 Want to work with me on your podcast, your friendships, or need another link? That’s probably here. This week's sponsor: Blue Box Press with Lexi Blake's newest novel, BUILT TO LAST. Visit https://www.lexiblake.net/Our Sponsors:* Check out Armoire: https://armoire.style/DEARNINAAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Many of us enjoy walking with friends for the mental and physical benefits (or could consider starting with the Dear Nina 2025 friendship challenge). However, the power of walking with friends is EXTRA inspiring in today’s episode.Leslie Hooton had to learn to walk multiple times throughout her life because of a stroke she had when she was born and numerous surgeries she's endured since. Leslie shares how neighborhood friends each took an assigned day when her beloved gym closed so that Leslie's muscles would get the essential movement necessary to keep her on her feet and healthy.Leslie shares wisdom on friendship she gained through these walks and through life in general. This is one you don't want to miss if you didn't catch it the first time.Meet Leslie HootonLeslie is the author of three novels. Her most recent book, After Everyone Else, was the winner of an Indie Book Award. Leslie says her best quality is her village of friends. Her second book is dedicated to them. Leslie often remarks that some people have a stroke of luck, she had a stroke at birth. The limited use of her right side and numerous surgeries have allowed Leslie a unique perspective, which she brings to her writing. Leslie uses dictation for her writing and often jokes “I haven’t typed a single word." You can find more information on Leslie's book on her website and on Instagram.ALL THE DEAR NINA LINKS + CONTACT INFO📢 This week’s fabulous sponsor + how to purchase ad space on Dear Nina📱 Subscribe to my newsletter “Conversations About Friendship” on Substack❤️ Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, the Dear Nina Facebook group📪 Ask an anonymous friendship question🔎 Want to work with me or need another link? That’s probably here.This week's sponsor: Blue Box Press with Lexi Blake's newest novel, BUILT TO LAST. Visit https://www.lexiblake.net/Our Sponsors:* Check out Armoire: https://armoire.style/DEARNINAAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

What if you have lots of friends, but nobody feels like your special confidante or the person who would have your back no matter what? The newest letter spotlight episode comes from a listener who signed off as "Too Many Fish in the Sea." She feels lucky to have cultivated a wide community and plenty of friends, but she doesn't feel like she has super close friends.Joining me to answer the letter is my assistant producer, Rebekah Jacobs. Rebekah has been working with me for a while, but I wanted to get her on the mic so you can hear why I adore working with her so much. AND we're good friends---newer good friends--with our own friendship story to share.We discussed concrete ways for getting closer to people you already like and creating deeper bonds: increase the frequency of your time together, share good news, be "messy," ask for a favor, change the venue, and become beginners together.MEET REBEKAH JACOBS:Rebekah has been a reading specialist and writing instructor for over 20 years, teaching in Boston, Chicago, DC, and Los Angeles. Currently, she teaches college writing in DC, and her own writing has been featured in Kveller. As assistant producer for Dear Nina, she is passionate about ideation and brainstorming creative concepts. She tries to read 80 books a year and loves TV—though, unlike Nina, cooking and tech are not her strong suit. She lives with her husband, three kids, and a goldendoodle named Peanut.LINKS MENTIONED IN THE EPISODE:Episode #19: with Rebekah Jacobs-- Novels and Memoirs About FriendshipEpisode #62: with Leslie Hooten-- The Friendship of the Weekly Walking PartnersEpisode #173: with Ruchi Koval-- I'm Just Not Into This FriendshipEpisode #126 with Anna Goldfarb-- Is it Time For a Friendship Cleanse?Episode #134 with SC Perot-- Fandom and the Potential for FriendshipAnna's book: Modern Friendship: How to Nurture Our Most Valued ConnectionsRebekah mentioned: The Five Types of Wealth by Sahil Bloom and a Laurie Santos reference to a beautiful mess here from Date Like A Scientist. ALL THE DEAR NINA LINKS + CONTACT INFO📢 This week’s fabulous sponsor + how to purchase ad space on Dear Nina📱 Subscribe to my newsletter “Conversations About Friendship” on Substack❤️ Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, the Dear Nina Facebook group📪 Ask an anonymous friendship question🔎 Want to work with me or need another link? That’s probably here.This week's sponsor: Blue Box Press with Lexi Blake's newest novel, BUILT TO LAST. Visit https://www.lexiblake.net/Our Sponsors:* Check out Armoire: https://armoire.style/DEARNINAAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

There are local friends and there are “HYPERLOCAL” friends. This month in the Dear Nina community, we’re focusing on hyperlocal friendships—developing new ones and maintaining the ones you already have in your life. I introduce the March friendship challenge in this episode, which of course you can start any day of ANY MONTH. The challenge this month focuses on hyperlocal friendships, emphasizing the significance of proximity in building connections. I share some personal anecdotes and practical tips for engaging with friends in your neighborhood or at least nearby. I’m encouraging listeners to take actionable steps to add this important layer to their social lives. As always, the Dear Nina friendship challenges help you to become a better friend and have better friendships. Stay in touch and let me know how it’s going in the Dear Nina Facebook group, through my newsletter at dearnina.substack.com, or on Instagram at @dearninafriendship.LINKS MENTIONED IN THE EPISODE:Episode #127: January challenge--See a Friend in PersonEpisode #131: February challenge--Start a Ritual with FriendsFragile Neighborhoods by Seth D. KaplanALL THE DEAR NINA LINKS + CONTACT INFO📢 This week’s fabulous sponsor + how to purchase ad space on Dear Nina📱 Subscribe to my newsletter “Conversations About Friendship” on Substack❤️ Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, the Dear Nina Facebook group📪 Ask an anonymous friendship question🔎 Want to work with me or need another link? That’s probably here.This week's sponsor: Blue Box Press with Lexi Blake's newest novel, BUILT TO LAST. Visit https://www.lexiblake.net/Our Sponsors:* Check out Armoire: https://armoire.style/DEARNINAAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

MAKING FRIENDS IN A FANDOM COMMUNITYFandom, especially very enthusiastic fandom, can provide community, belonging, and friendship. In episode #134 of Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship, I'm joined by Vanderbilt professor, lawyer, author, and joy enthusiast, SC Perot, who shares her story of rediscovering joy after a devastating divorce, highlighting how her newfound interest in Harry Styles and the community surrounding his concerts provided a much-needed escape and a way to connect with people who wanted to discuss something other than divorce. A formerly-casual fan of Harry Styles, SC ended up attending 17 Harry Styles concerts in five countries!SC and I discuss her memoir Styles of Joy: A Feel-Good Framework for Rediscovering Joy (with a Twist!), which encompass her study of joy, the importance of being open to new experiences, the power of shared interests in fostering new friendships, the particular qualities of emotional generosity and uncomplicated friendships in fan communities.This conversation highlights the significance of community and the joy that comes from the deep love of a musician, team, book series, or anything where a fan community forms. Ultimately, all friends start as strangers, and fan communities are a great place to bond with strangers over a shared passion.MEET SC PEROTSarah Catherine "SC" Perot was born and raised in Dallas, Texas, and currently lives in Nashville, Tennessee. She is a proud graduate of Vanderbilt University and Stanford Law School, where she earned a Juris Doctor degree. After practicing law, she pivoted during the pandemic to follow a longtime desire to teach. She is presently an Adjunct Faculty member at her alma mater, Vanderbilt University, where she teaches in the Human and Organizational Development department. The running through line of her varied career and life is a steadfast love for people and storytelling. Find her on Instagram @scperot.ALL THE DEAR NINA LINKS + CONTACT INFO📢 This week’s fabulous sponsor + how to purchase ad space on Dear Nina📱 Subscribe to my newsletter “Conversations About Friendship” on Substack❤️ Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, the Dear Nina Facebook group📪 Ask an anonymous friendship question🔎 Want to work with me or need another link? That’s probably here.This week's sponsor: Blue Box Press with Lexi Blake's newest novel, BUILT TO LAST. Visit https://www.lexiblake.net/Our Sponsors:* Check out Armoire: https://armoire.style/DEARNINAAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Talking to Friends About Sex at Any AgeIt's not uncommon to discuss our sex lives with friends during the adolescent and college years. But as we age, it becomes less comfortable. Trust and privacy (of our partner) can be significant barriers to discussing intimate details as well as a fear that friends will judge our issues, desires, and choices.Dr. Arielle Buch-Frohlich, a clinical psychologist specializing in sex and couples therapy, joins me to remind listeners how discussing sex with friends at any age can have major benefits. Perhaps our sex lives, as we get older, would stay better, healthier, more robust, or we'd have better feelings about it, if we were talking about it with our friends.Dr. Arielle feels that normalizing conversations about sex, despite significant taboos around this topic, can lead to healthier relationships since human sexuality evolves over time, just like we do. She says that single and married friends can share experiences, but it requires mutual trust. We discuss how romance/fantasy novels and certain shows and movies can facilitate conversations about sex and other ideas for broaching the topic with friends.Meet Dr. Arielle Buch-FrohlichDr. Arielle Buch-Frohlich is a clinical psychologist licensed in Ontario and Quebec. She completed a doctorate in Clinical Psychology (Psy.D) from the Université du Québec à Montréal (UQAM) and received clinical training from the Sex and Couple Therapy Service at the Allen Memorial Institute. Dr. Arielle specializes in sex and relationships, to help individuals and couples thrive. Additionally, Dr. Arielle seeks to help young couples thrive through the transition to parenthood, with expertise in fertility, perinatal and postpartum mental health.For more information, please email dr.arielle.therapy@gmail.com or book a free 15 minute consult online at drarielletherapy.com.  ALL THE DEAR NINA LINKS + CONTACT INFO📢 This week’s fabulous sponsor + how to purchase ad space on Dear Nina📱 Subscribe to my newsletter “Conversations About Friendship” on Substack❤️ Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, the Dear Nina Facebook group📪 Ask an anonymous friendship question🔎 Want to work with me or need another link? That’s probably here.This week's sponsor: Blue Box Press with Lexi Blake's newest novel, BUILT TO LAST. Visit https://www.lexiblake.net/Our Sponsors:* Check out Armoire: https://armoire.style/DEARNINAAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

While friendship is an essential type of connection at every age and the one area of personal growth I discuss most often on Dear Nina, today’s guest, psychologist Dr. Adam Dorsay, expands the conversation to the four types of connections we need to lead fulfilling lives. Those four areas are: connection to ourselves, to others, to the world, and to something greater. Dr. Adam, author of Super Psyched: Unleash the Power of the 4 Types of Connection and Live the Life You Love, shares the FEED model for enhancing connection. We also talk about the consequences of disconnection, the nuances of loneliness and solitude, strategies for revitalizing old friendships, the role of activities in making new friends, and the impact of fear of rejection on social interactions. Super Psyched has been endorsed by Lori Gottlieb, Daniel H. Pink, Mel Robbins, Guy Kawasaki, A.J. Jacobs, and many others. And Dr. Adam and I got along so well on this episode that we also recorded an episode about adult friendships on his podcast! (Ep #247 of SuperPsyched, “A Conversation With Nina Badzin”)MEET DR. ADAM DORSAY:Dr. Adam Dorsay is a licensed psychologist and executive coach in Silicon Valley where he serves high-achieving adults (including professionals, executives, entrepreneurs, and professional athletes). Adam is the host of SuperPsyched, an award-winning podcast, and the author of Super Psyched: Unleash the Power of the 4 Types of Connection and Live the Life You Love.Beyond his private practice, Adam is a resiliency expert who co-created an international program for Facebook’s Online Safety employees for several years. He now serves as the resiliency consultant to DigitalOcean and has frequent requests from the media for interviews. He has provided keynotes and trainings to multiple corporations and organizations, including Microsoft, Linkedin, and the California Psychological Association. He is happily married, the father of young boys, and he has a hypoallergenic 33-pound Australian Labradoodle therapy dog named Raffi, who lives at his home and works at his office.ALL THE DEAR NINA LINKS + CONTACT INFO📢 This week’s fabulous sponsor + how to purchase ad space on Dear Nina📱 Subscribe to my newsletter “Conversations About Friendship” on Substack❤️ Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, the Dear Nina Facebook group📪 Ask an anonymous friendship question🔎 Want to work with me or need another link? That’s probably here.This week's sponsor: Blue Box Press with Lexi Blake's newest novel, BUILT TO LAST. Visit https://www.lexiblake.net/Our Sponsors:* Check out Armoire: https://armoire.style/DEARNINAAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

It's time for the next Dear Nina Friendship Monthly Challenge! The January challenge was to see a friend in person, which meant reaching out to make a plan. The February challenge is to start a ritual/tradition with friends to strengthen new relationships or maintain existing ones.For accountability, report back in the Dear Nina Facebook Group, on Substack, or via email when you've made the plan. It's okay if the plan doesn't happen in February. Just get the planning going!To quote (myself!) from January, "In a healthy, robust, social life, or at least a deeply fulfilling one where you feel like you can be yourself, there's less keeping score, less keeping track, less waiting for invitations, and less moralizing about who should have included you. You dear listener are in charge. You will do the including."And that statement is completely applicable to the February challenge as well. I hear from people who feel they need to start over with friendships or that they've never had good friends. So when you hear something like "start a ritual," you might be thinking, "But Nina, I don't have any close friends." And that's the point. These rituals and traditions can become the foundation of close friendships.In my interview with Rachel Steinman and Rachel Winter, co-authors of STAY GOLDEN, GIRLS, you will hear examples of traditions between longtime friends, newer friends, and I share some of my own traditions with people who are now longtime friends, but who weren't when we started certain annual plans.The power in rituals and traditions are not even about the activity itself in many cases. It's about the anticipation and organization! Of course there are tricky elements of planning these traditions, too. How many people should you include? That's a big one, and there are others. We discuss them all in the episode!Links mentioned:All the 2025 Monthly Challenges newsletter posts "How to Make Plans with Friends" Episode #56 with Kat Vellos: Managing Group TextsMeet "The Rachels"Rachel Steinman and Rachel Winter are here to help give inspiration to all of us. They’ve been friends since they were 18 years old though, and they are both accomplished and interesting women on their own, but together they co-wrote Stay Golden, Girls, a gift book about the importance of women’s friendships.Rachel Steinman is a writer, teacher, and mental health educator. She hosts the Dear Family, Podcast with inspirational guests who have overcome mental health obstacles to thrive. She received her Masters in Education and teaching credentials from UCLA, has taught every elementary school grade, and has been a school librarian. She is a lead presenter for NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness), going into middle and high schools to educate students, parents, and staff about warning signs while offering resources and hope. Rachel Winter is a writer, director, and an Academy Award®-nominated producer for Dallas Buyers Club. Winter, along with LeBron James, produced James’ biopic, Shooting Stars, released on Peacock in June 2023. Available now from iHeart Radio, Winter produced and directed the audio drama Supreme: The Battle for Roe, and made her directorial debut with The Space Between, starring Kelsey Grammer, for which they both received awards from various Film Festivals.All social media and purchasing links for Stay Golden, Girls, can be found here.ALL THE DEAR NINA LINKS + CONTACT INFO📢 This week’s fabulous sponsor + how to purchase ad space on Dear Nina📱 Subscribe to my newsletter “Conversations About Friendship” on Substack❤️ Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, the Dear Nina Facebook group📪 Ask an anonymous friendship question🔎 Want to work with me or need another link? That’s probably here.This week's sponsor: Blue Box Press with Lexi Blake's newest novel, BUILT TO LAST. Visit https://www.lexiblake.net/Our Sponsors:* Check out Armoire: https://armoire.style/DEARNINAAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands