DiscoverFootball Cliches - A show about the language of football
Football Cliches - A show about the language of football
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Football Cliches - A show about the language of football

Author: The Athletic

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The Athletic's Adam Hurrey explores the glorious and unique language of football: the words, the phrases, the mannerisms and, above all, the clichés.

Featuring 'Mesut Haaland Dicks' interviews with the likes of Jamie Carragher, Nedum Onuoha, Tom Rosenthal and many more too.

247 Episodes
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The Athletic's Adam Hurrey is joined by David Walker and Charlie Eccleshare for the Adjudication Panel. On the agenda: Marking the demise of Soccer AM by selecting its ultimate guest lineup, "The Messi of Maths" and his equivalent of the cold, wet Tuesday night in Stoke, some very alternative goal commentary from the archives and an unexpected footballing name pops up in Law & Order: Special Victims Unit. Meanwhile, the panel dissect the art of the Wacky Friday Press Conference Question and try to statistically crown the "tidiest" player in the Premier League. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
The Athletic's Adam Hurrey is joined by David Walker and Nick Miller for the Adjudication Panel. On the agenda: The most punworthy FA Cup quarter-final in living memory, Nike vs Warner Bros in a Ted Lasso kit saga, the player eligible to play for the most different countries, tracking down the goalkeeper cited in an unfortunate dictionary definition and, once again, checking in with good old Richard Keys. Meanwhile, the panel debate whether it's better to be a "handy" side or a "useful" one and which Premier League fixtures just belong in a certain year. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
With well over 200 episodes in our archive we thought we'd raid our back catalogue to bring you some examples of the purest essence of the Football Cliches podcast. This week we head back to episode 61 to examine the true meaning of the phrase 'Basement Boys', and from episode 95 we bring you the midfield selections & deliberations of the Pure Europa League XI Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
The Athletic's Adam Hurrey, James Maw and Jack Lang field March's listener entries for Mesut Haaland Dicks, where the Clichés faithful nominate their niche footballing fascinations and irritations. Among the selections are childish (and borderline pathetic) nicknames fans give for local rivals' home grounds, the precise rhythm and intonation of a perfect full-time whistle, the catharsis of complimenting opposition players at Sunday League, teams being guilty of trying to score the perfect goal, goalkeepers who rush out with the ball from a corner only to find nobody to distribute it to and the eternal and unexplained flaw of Wikipedia football career summaries *** • Get a FREE 1-year supply of immune-supporting Vitamin D AND 5 FREE travel packs with your first purchase at athleticgreens.com/EPL Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
The Athletic's Adam Hurrey is joined by David Walker and Charlie Eccleshare for the Adjudication Panel. On the agenda: surveying the wreckage of the weekend's Match of the Day saga, an unexpected Indian summer for one English manager's career, a Premier League referee texting into a music radio station and yet another example of a thing being dubbed the Rolls-Royce of Item X. Meanwhile, the panel wonder who - if anyone - can lay claim to being "the voice of football" in 2023. ** • Get a FREE 1-year supply of immune-supporting Vitamin D AND 5 FREE travel packs with your first purchase at athleticgreens.com/EPL Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
With well over 200 episodes in our archive we thought we'd raid our back catalogue to bring you some examples of the purest essence of the Football Cliches podcast, this week we head back to episode 154 for the definitive discussion on what constitutes the concept of 'Dreamland', from episode 78 we attempt to define what makes a goal a 'solo effort', and finally one of the most ridiculous clips in Football Cliches history as Pierre Emile Hoijberg shows "no disrespect to egg" Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
The Athletic's Adam Hurrey is joined by David Walker and Charlie Eccleshare for the Adjudication Panel. On the agenda: some professional musicians wade into the Sheffield Wednesday/ABBA saga, a thorough fact-check of Dion Dublin’s goalscoring boasts on Homes under the Hammer, the parameters for a "slaloming" dribble, the most versatile generic football fan outburst of all and arguably the best parody-metal song about the 1994 World Cup final you have ever heard. Meanwhile, the panel pin down the most "Mickey Mouse cup" in football and identify the most Premier League club never to have played in the Premier League. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
The Athletic's Adam Hurrey is joined by David Walker and Nick Miller for the Adjudication Panel. On the agenda: Some more joyous local radio co-commentary, the least expected product in the world to be described as a "Rolls-Royce", Martin Tyler and Peter Drury on proverbial cake-topping scorelines and an unprecedented way of saying a game is still goalless. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
The Football Clichés Quiz returns for a seventh edition. Reigning champion Michael Cox looks to retain his title once more as the takes on ex-Opta information ace Duncan Alexander across another five rounds of niche footballing knowledge, including Things In Football That Somehow Have Never Happened, the Premier League's foreign influx, top-flight managers with moustaches and much more. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
The Athletic's Adam Hurrey is joined by David Walker and Charlie Eccleshare for the Adjudication Panel. On the agenda: Using the word "champions" for cup winners, Jurgen Klinsmann's perfect new job, a brief history of Steve McManaman measuring space in ounces, a Sheffield Wednesday fan's ABBA dilemma and the looming prospect of a "Big Seven" in English football. Meanwhile, the panel decide what constitutes a defender "doing just enough" and ponder whether "upfield" and "downfield" really do mean the exact same thing. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
With well over 200 episodes in our archive we thought we'd raid our back catalogue to bring you some examples of the purest essence of the Football Cliches podcast, this week we head back to episode 61 to bring you an unprecedented pronunciation of an area of the pitch that made the Clichés panel reassess everything they thought they knew, and even further back in episode 46 Elis James blew our minds by helping us discover the most recognisable piece of generic football crowd noise you'll ever hear Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
The Athletic's Adam Hurrey, Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker field February's listener entries for Mesut Haaland Dicks, where the Clichés faithful nominate their niche footballing fascinations and irritations. Among the selections are watching football through a pub window, the five specific scenarios that allow you to chant "SIGN HIM UP!", players being photoshopped into the kit of the team trying to sign them and substitutes who creep onto the pitch while they're warming up. Meanwhile, the Adjudication Panel look ahead to Graeme Le Saux's stand-up comedy debut, enjoy the sons of two Barclays-era names going head to head in the National League and assess an AI-generated vision of the footballing loves and hates of Richard Keys. *** • Get a FREE 1-year supply of immune-supporting Vitamin D AND 5 FREE travel packs with your first purchase at athleticgreens.com/EPL • Take advantage of MANSCAPED®’s best valued bundle and save 20% Off and Free Shipping with the code EPL23 at Manscaped.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
The Athletic's Adam Hurrey is joined by David Walker and Charlie Eccleshare for the Adjudication Panel. On the agenda: a Premier League centre-back namechecked on Frasier 29 years ago, what scorelines qualify as "a rout", a Match of the Day commentator responds to our scepticism over his description of a header, North Korean football journalism and a scandalous football-related question on Who Wants to Be a Millionaire? Meanwhile, the panel check in on an April 2022 prediction from Richard Keys about Erik ten Hag. *** • Get a FREE 1-year supply of immune-supporting Vitamin D AND 5 FREE travel packs with your first purchase at athleticgreens.com/EPL • Take advantage of MANSCAPED®’s best valued bundle and save 20% Off and Free Shipping with the code EPL23 at Manscaped.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
With well over 200 episodes in our archive we thought we'd raid our back catalogue to bring you some examples of the purest essence of the Football Cliches podcast, this week we bring you a snippet of the Sam Allardyce XI and relive the now infamous Cometh The Hour-gate Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
The Athletic's Adam Hurrey and Charlie Eccleshare are joined by comedian and writer Josh Pugh for the latest edition of Mesut Haaland Dicks. Among Josh's selections are players who go to World Cups because they're "good to have around", the phrase "bringing the ball under their spell", Sunday League pre-season regimes and the complex philosophy of "playing football the right way". Meanwhile, the Adjudication Panel enjoy some more quintessential Glenn Hoddle co-commentary and an ex-player very politely editing their own Wikipedia page. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
The Athletic's Adam Hurrey is joined by David Walker and Charlie Eccleshare for the Adjudication Panel. On the agenda: whether Carlo Ancelotti is the most international team-y manager who’s never managed a national team, the difference between the midfield jobs of "sniffing out danger" and "putting out fires", some exquisitely-timed Match of the Day crowd noise and at what point a gap at the top of a league turns into a "procession". Meanwhile, the panel decide if a team can ever call themselves "the visitors", and what leads can be "raced into" . *** • Visit babbel.com/play and use code ATHLETIC at checkout to receive 6 months for free with purchase of a 6-month subscription • Building a bet just got easier! Visit livescorebet.com to find out more about how to make your selections today! 18+ only Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
The Athletic's Adam Hurrey and Charlie Eccleshare are joined by broadcaster and 90s football video legend Nick Hancock for the latest edition of Mesut Haaland Dicks. Among Nick's selections for his footballing fascinations and irritations are the mundane details of timewasting, our evolving expectations of footballers' intellect, the curious mind games behind the late fitness test, manufactured matchday atmosphere, the vagaries of the football disciplinary process and lazy football merchandising. Meanwhile, the Adjudication Panel discuss whether football shorts really need pockets, Dayot Upamecano's voice coaching from an opera singer and a new level in weird goalnet sounds. Produced by Mike Stavrou. *** • Get a FREE 1-year supply of immune-supporting Vitamin D AND 5 FREE travel packs with your first purchase at athleticgreens.com/epl • Get 6 months of Babbel language learning for free when you purchase a 6 month subscription by entering the code ATHLETIC at babbel.com/play Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
The Athletic's Adam Hurrey is joined by Charlie Eccleshare and Nick Miller for the Adjudication Panel. On the agenda: every recorded Jack Grealish reaction being fouled, the intensely disturbing vibe of Nathan Jones, the commentary turning point of Harry Kane's 267-goal Spurs compilation and an astonishing moment of radio-reporter synchronicity. Meanwhile, the panel decide when a team can be described as "high-flying" and discuss the nuanced meaning of the word "benched." Produced by Abi Paterson *** • Get a FREE 1-year supply of immune-supporting Vitamin D AND 5 FREE travel packs with your first purchase at athleticgreens.com/epl • Get 6 months of Babbel language learning for free when you purchase a 6 month subscription by entering the code ATHLETIC at babbel.com/play Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
The Pure Serie A XI

The Pure Serie A XI

2023-02-0258:44

The Athletic's Adam Hurrey is joined by James Horncastle and Michael Cox to compile the most representative lineup of players from the last 30 years of Italian football's technical quirks, huge egos and curious career paths. Their journey takes them from an early goalkeeping dilemma to an ancient but granite-reinforced back three, the inevitable Thomas Helveg, a textbook selection at left wing-back, an imported No 10 who stayed so long he essentially became Italian, a late-blooming domestic goal machine, an impish strike partner from the Gazetta golden era...and one fabled taskmaster to drill them all into a winning unit. *** Get 20% Off and FREE shipping with the code EPL23 at manscaped.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
The Athletic's Adam Hurrey is joined by David Walker and Duncan Alexander for the Adjudication Panel. On the agenda: Brendan Rodgers talks about his 50th birthday in the most football way possible, the point at which goals compilations can go from "best" to "greatest", whether a fullback can be described as "box-to-box" and some far-fetched movie references on the BBC for Wrexham's FA Cup Hollywood heroics. Meanwhile, the panel decide the threshold for a stadium to become a "cathedral of football" and the precise location for a player to be "picking up the pieces". *** Get 20% Off and FREE shipping with the code EPL23 at manscaped.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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Comments (9)

Kristian Matthews

Strikers Union?? Do strikers have a union? Goalkeepers do, but do strikers?

Aug 9th
Reply

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Nov 23rd
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Nov 22nd
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Kristian Matthews

Brian Clough used a 4-5-1 formation in the 1980 European Cup final vs Hamburg. Trevor Francis was injured so Clough played Gary Mills (?) in midfield instead of up front alongside Gary Birtles. A 4-5-1 formation.

Nov 7th
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