Foreplay Radio – Couples and Sex Therapy

Let's talk about sex, baby! Not sure how to have the best sex talk? We put together a comprehensive list of topics to cover. Join us today as we work through the acronym we developed to set couples up to have the best talk about sex! Topics range from bodies to laughter and everything in between that couples need to talk about when it comes to sex and their relationship. Whether you are spending your first anniversary together or your 50th you will benefit from this episode. Having conversations about sex is vital to a long lasting and deeply satisfying relationship. Visit our Instagram account and click the link in bio to download our worksheet that guides you through this exercise. Keep it hot y’all! Check out our sponsors: UberLube.com/foreplay -- Laurie's go-to lube for the past 25 years. Use the code foreplay for 10% off! Addyi.com -- a drug for women with low libido! Use the code foreplay for a $10 telemedicine appointment. RocketMoney.com/foreplay -- cancel those zombie online subscriptions before you renew! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Not sure how to have a great conversation about your sex life? Don't worry, we've got you covered! In this latest edition of our school of love lessons, Laurie and George teach listeners how, when and where to begin this conversation. Starting is often the hardest part and it's so easy to build up all the ways this could go wrong in your mind. However, the ability to have these sometimes awkward conversations is vital to a lifetime of love. Join us today to learn how to bring up this conversation and the check-in questions partners can ask one another to gauge the status of their sex life. In this conversation, you'll move beyond how often we are/aren't knocking boots to understanding needs, depth of connection, intimacy and other factors that make great lovers. A fabulous George and Laurie role play will guide you through and is sure to give any couple a dose of confidence. TLDR; How to gracefully bring up a conversation about your sex life and the four components to cover. Keep it hot y'all! Check out our great sponsors: Addyi.com -- a drug to help women's libido ForiaWellness.com/foreplay -- lotions to help you get going! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Did you ever stop and think about why you view sex the way you do? Where did your thoughts and feelings on sex come from? In this episode, George and Laurie discuss how cultural influences affect our view of sex. Culture includes race, religion, sexuality, location you were raised among others. There are so many factors that make up your perspective of sex and relationships. Listen to our hosts share how their cultural experiences have shaped their worlds and the work they have done to expand their views. They share that a key to understanding cultural influences more is flexibility and creative thinking. George and Laurie discuss expanding beyond a dualistic way of thinking that says "either, or' to 'both, and.' George reminds us we don't have to have all the answers, we just need to start the conversation. Check out our sponsors (and help support the podcast!): FactorMeals.com/foreplay50 -- great, quick meals and delicious too! Use the code Foreplay50 for 50% off your first order and 20% off your second! Uberlube.com --Laurie's favorite lubricant! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Last episode we invited listeners to have a candid conversation with their partners about emotions and how your family  expressed emotions. This week on our latest lesson in the 'school of love,' we are talking about how to have positive conversations about your sexual history. As therapists, we gather this information and call it a sexual assessment. The funny thing is, it's not all about sex! We are curious to learn about touch you experienced in life, how affection was displayed and how the family talked about sex or bodies. Touch is vital to human survival and it's important to gather that key information. Sometimes we work with individuals that grew up in emotionally disconnected houses but physical affection was fine to express. Other times we find that physical affection was not given and individuals have to shut down that need to be touched or held very early on. We hope that this episode will induce a conversation between partners to learn more about your earlier experiences with touch and sexuality. Grab your notepads, students and write down the following to get you started: What was touch like in your family? How did your family/peer group talk about sexuality and puberty? What were your first sexual experie nces like? How do you like to be touched? As always, keep it hot y'all!  Check out our sponsors! RocketMoney.com -- get rid of those subscriptions that you signed up for and don't use! Easy way to save money. ForiaWellness.com/foreplay50 -- products to enhance your sex life! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Our latest installment in our school of love, introduces listeners to the essential questions to ask your partner to understand their attachment relationships. EFT therapists conduct an attachment history during their early sessions to better understand the protections of each partner and why they may use pursuing or withdrawing strategies when experiencing relationship distress. Join us today to hear the questions George and Laurie ask during their couples sessions and give us their answers and personal insights. When we can get more depth and understanding, there is a new ability to create lasting change. Even though the past hurtful event remains the same, the new information creates new opportunities. Make sure to take some notes during today's love lesson and work with your partner to find answers to attachment based questions such as: What did you learn from your family about emotions? Was there safety to express vulnerability or insecurities? Who comforted you in times of need? We hope this exercise helps you and your partner with the emotional assessment most relationships are missing. This week we're asking you to 'Keep it Sweet' because we all need a little more safety. Check out our sponsors: Factormeals.com/foreplay50 -- Factor Meals are easy to make and are delicious! Use the coupon code 'foreplay50' Uberlube.com -- Laurie has recommended Uberlube as a lubricant for years. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Join George and Laurie as we answer a 'Mailbag' question from a listener that asks our hosts with their help to fix their sexless marriage. Sexless marriages are defined as having sex less than four times a year. Our listener shares that they love their partner but know that they withdraw both emotionally and sexually. She has worked hard to try ALL the things to increase engagement on both levels and finds that not much has changed. Our hosts are masters of empathy and begin a conversation with empathy and validation for both partners. George and Laurie work to take us inside the 'inner world' of the withdrawing partner to understand better the things that aren't being articulated. However, while our hosts validate the current state of the relationship they won't co-sign NOT having a conversation. Listen along today to hear Laurie and George's great suggestions which include finding an EFT therapist, naming the unnamed and reducing the pressure. Head on over to our website to submit your mailbag question! Check out our fantastic sponsors: Foriawellness.com/foreplay -- for great sex-enhancing products! Cozyearth.com/foreplay -- for the softest sheets and lounge wear you'll ever touch! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Attachment theory helps lovers make sense of why we do what we do in relationships. Developed from attachment theory, the theory of human bonding, are 4 attachment styles that characterize behaviors in relationships. We like to also call them strategies and we use these strategies as a means of protection when we sense a real or perceived threat in our most intimate relationships. On today's episode Laurie and George break down the four attachment styles and their presentation in emotional and sexual cycles. What's important to remember is that attachment relationships begin in childhood and span into adulthood, attachment styles are not fixed and can be improved, and once you name or identify something you can begin a conversation towards change. When we do internal work to become more secure in relationships we are able to take more risks, be more vulnerable and better tolerate ruptures. If you find that you identify with an "insecure" attachment style, it's okay! This is a great learning opportunity to learn more about yourself and what your needs are. Thanks for joining us today in our latest 'School of Love' lesson. Keep it hot y'all! Visit our fabulous sponsors: Check out Rocketmoney.com and stop spending money on subscriptions you don't use! Uberlube.com/foreplay -- Laurie's favorite lubricant! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Maybe you've decided that you need to work on your relationship but what is it exactly that you want to work on? You don't want to sit in therapy and rehash every argument you had that week. Most often couples want relief from their distress and for their relationship to return to a time of greater joy and happiness. Join George and Laurie today as they share how to determine what you want when you make a decision to improve your relationship. Your homework assignment for this school of love lesson is to write down a list of positive qualities and interactions with your partner and your relationship strengths. These essential qualities are often not commented on and there can be a tendency to be problem focused when you consider your relationship. Negative feedback creates more negative feedback and this is when couples become stuck in a negative interaction cycle. Next, we encourage you to think about what you want to improve and how you can take action to make some changes. Finding clarity in what you want to work on in your relationship is a great first step to creating a fulfilling and meaningful relationship with both partners. Hop on over to our Instagram account @foreplay_sextherapy and share your thoughts!  Check out our great sponsors and help support the podcast! ForiaWellness.com/foreplay -- great products to enhance your sex life! CozyEarth.com -- the softest sheets and loungewear! You'll love them! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome Foreplay listeners to a can't miss episode with our friend and colleague Dr. Corey Allan co-host of Sexy Marriage Radio podcast. With over 13 million downloads Corey and his wife Pam, lead couples in deepening and improving conversation about physical intimacy and keeping your marriage sexy. While we are missing George today, we are over the moon to have Corey on as a guest. Are you afraid to let your partner in on your sexual longings? Maybe you know what you want but have no idea how to start the conversation, let alone contine it. Hear Laurie and Corey talk about the best ways to craft these conversations and speak to your partner in the most self-respecting way. How to recover quickly from disconnect to reconnect and kicking perfection out of the bedroom! This episode is filled with amazing gems on marriage that are sure to resonate. Make sure to give them a like and follow on IG @sexymarriageradio and visit their website at  https://smr.fm/  for more information on course, coaching and retreats. George will be back with us next time as we continue working to keep it hot y'all! Like what we're doing? We'd love to have you rate and review our show wherever you stream Foreplay. Check out our sponsors: CozyEarth.com -- for the sexiest, softest, sheets and loungewear out there! Uberlube.com -- Laurie's favorite lubricant to make sex glide! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The saying goes that laughter is the best medicine. In our work as couples therapists, we've seen the power of shared laughter between partners. Laughter has the ability to derail an oncoming cycle, increase playfulness and deepen the bond between lovers. We've also seen moments where humor falls flat and complaints disguised as jokes cause damage. Today's show has listeners learning about the benefits of laughter between partners and creative ways to increase laughter in your bedroom routine. Recalling Emily Nagowski's work from the best-selling book "Come As You Are," hosts Laurie and George discuss when humor is a gas pedal or a brake when it comes to sexual connection and desire in relationships. We encourage listeners to remember that timing is key, we have to consider impact over intent, and find out what makes us laugh together. When laughter is a shared experience it opens up the hearts of lovers even further! Check out our sponsors: RocketMoney.com -- Get rid of those online subscriptions that are like zombies eating your budget! Foriawellness.com/foreplay -- Foria has great products to enhance your sexual experience. Highly recommended by Laurie! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today we are welcoming an attachment expert and our dear friend Julie Mennano, LMFT to the pod. You may know Julie already from her incredibly popular instagram account @thesecurerelationship. With over one million followers, Julie has been educating about attachment theory and EFT on Instagram since 2020 and is the owner of Bozeman Therapy and Counseling, LLC in Montana. She is joining us today to share her new book Secure Love and to help our listeners understand what secure love looks like in action. Julie will break down the four attachment styles and how couples can work to maintain the integrity of their bond through conflict and misunderstanding. Her beautiful work helps us understand how to keep a balance between heart and mind. Couples that read Secure Love will learn more about their attachment bond, being connected even in conflict and how to treat loved ones with care. We encourage you to pick up a copy today to create a relationship that lasts a lifetime. Included is a chapter on secure s*x, which we know our listeners will love! Thanks and keep it hot and secure y'all! Check out our awesome sponsors for this episode: CozyEarth.com -- the best, softest, most wonderful sheets and loungewear! Use the code 'Foreplay' for a site-wide 35% discount! Uberlube.com -- Laurie has been recommending Uberlube for years! Great lubricant that makes everything work smoothly! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Foreplay listeners, join us today for a lesson on emotions! In this installment of our 'Love School' series George and Laurie are letting listeners in on the meaning of emotions and how we can lean into our feelings to improve our love life. There are 5 universally recognized emotions and behind each emotion lies a longing or need. In relationships miscommunication occurs because our non-verbal signals display these emotions well before our verbal communication has a chance to catch up. Go behind the science of emotions and communication with us today and learn how to repair when a bid for physical intimacy begins to go wrong. There is a depth of emotion to explore in s*x and this episode will give you actionable steps to having better conversations. Have you liked our lessons on love? Let us know by leaving a rating/review wherever you listen to our podcast and give us a follow on Instagram @foreplay_sextherapypodcast Sponsors: Addyi.com Foriawellness.com/FOREPLAY to get 20% off your first order or use code FOREPLAY at checkout Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Time to get nerdy with us today listeners! We're taking another deep dive into the science of love and bonded relationships and exploring more about attachment theory. We've noticed the trend over the years of big labels being stamped on relationships and it can leave the outlook on love a little dim. Our hope in this episode is to provide more education on behaviors that are created to deal with distress in close relationships. We cite some great research from leading experts, like Peggy Kleinplatz and Girut Birnbaum dedicated to the study of relationships, for couples and therapists around the world to help people love one another better. If you've experienced distress and disconnection and may have some disillusionment about love we invite you to learn more about attachment. We know that strong relationships lead to better quality life and health. Understanding attachment and the science of love is key to getting you there. This is the education we never got in school but so desperately need! Check out our fantastic sponsors: CozyEarth -- the most fantastic, softest, comfiest sheets you've ever slept on! Use the coupon code 'foreplay' to get 35% off site-wide! Addyi.com/Foreplay -- Ask your gynecologist about this drug that helps women with low libido! Rocket Money - Rocket Money can track down and cancel all those online subscriptions you've made and forgotten about that come out of your bank automatically. Save money with Rocket Money! Use the link and let them know we sent you! Uberlube - Laurie's long time favorite lubricant! She's been recommending Uberlube to her clients for years! Use the code 'foreplay' to get your discount! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This episode is all about attachment theory. Attachment styles have been buzzing in the pop psychology world recently. Our hosts invite listeners to learn more about attachment theory which helps us understand why we fight the way we do and why our partner reacts to conflict in the way they do. Attachment theory is based on the idea that we are here to connect and life is all about relationship and meaningful connection. Join us today as we break down attachment theory, and the attachment styles secure, anxious, avoidant and disorganized. Laurie and George help us put on our attachment lenses to make sense of relationship behaviors that are often misunderstood. You'll take away the useful tips from acronyms A.R.E and O.I.L and how to make your relationship more secure today! Let's us help you love better this year! Check out our great sponsors! Foriawellness.com/Foreplay -- get 20% off your first order! Lumedeodorant.com -- Foreplay listeners get $5 off the starter pack! Addyi.com -- an FDA approved drug for women struggling with low libido. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Grab your pen and notebook for this, you're going to want ALL the notes from this episode! George and Dr. Laurie answer a mailbag question from a longtime listener about bl*w jobs. More specifically, wanting to know how to talk to their spouse about feeling disappointed that this isn't happening in their sex life. We know that this might be a tense topic for some but our hosts do a fantastic job of equalizing this and addressing what stops oral sex from happening for either partner. Touch, taste, smell and thoughts around the physical aspects of the act are some of the reasons that block or*l sex from being a more regular part of your repertoire. Laurie and George give us some tips and tricks on how to improve basic gential hygiene. Most importantly, these experts discuss the communication issues that present and block partners from having a successful conversation about this topic. As always George reinforces, "if a couple can have a conversation about something then anything is possible." Learn how to work through this delicate conversation with your partner and strengthen the security in your sex life today! Therapists, if you want to help your clients gain more success around these conversations, make sure you join us for our upcoming Sex and EFT training this January. There is still time to register on our website. We hope to see you there! Check out our awesome sponsors! (They help us keep the lights on and the episodes coming!) CozyEarth.com - the softest, nicest, bestest sheets and PJ's I've ever used! Uberlube.com - Best sex lubricant on the market! Safe and effective. EveryPlate.com/podcasts -- use the code 'Foreplay' to receive $1 steaks! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

If you've ever scratched your head and wondered 'why does my partner do that?' this episode is for you. What if you could understand the waves that hit you when you face rejection or failure with your partner? This episode will help you do exactly that. We've talked a lot  about pursuers and withdrawers in past episodes. Join us today as we name the five waves that each position experience in a negative cycle. George shares that we need to understand the waves to develop language in these sometimes dark places. It will be hard to communicate what you don't have words for and our hosts want to help you develop the vocabulary to speak openly and honestly to your love. What better way to start off the new year than learning how to love better. Grab your surfboards listeners and come along with us to learn how to ride the relationship waves with ease! Check out our great sponsors! Addy.com for medical treatment of female low libido RocketMoney.com - to help you eliminate unwanted subscriptions that you started and no longer want. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome listeners to today's episode! A pick six in football is when the opposing team catches an interception and returns in for a touchdown. This can either be the most exhilarating or devastating play of the game depending on which team you are cheering on. Either way, it is an exciting play that can change the outcome of the situation. Join us today as we have a little fun and apply this to relationships. In today's episode you will learn how to salvage a relationship mishap. George and Laurie share several examples of common cycle starters and how we can override the automatic response and respond more relationally. Your partner tries to initiate s*x but you are busy. You see their disappointment and feel yourself getting critical, learn how to slow down and communicate with your partner. In another example, your partner asks for your help and you brush them off because you have SO many more things to be working on. Your partner reacts by shutting down: learn how to re-engage and support them! Intimate relationships are a series or ruptures and repairs and the most successful couples have a solid repair strategy. Gather your favorite teammate and listen to this episode to improve your repair playbook today! Check out our great sponsors! Uberlube.com RocketMoney.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

But, George and Laurie, what is "rizz?" Rizz, selected as Oxford's word of the year for 2023, is defined as a slang term used to describe someone's ability to flirt. The word may be familiar as its origin is the existing word charisma. Join us in this episode as we break down what is rizz and how to apply it to your relationship. Maybe you're already one of those people that has a keen ability to light up a room, draw others to you, be self-confident and also intune with your audience. Some of us may struggle here but learning to rizz better is possible and perhaps something to add to your 2024 resolutions list. Our hosts implore us to do this by: improving active listening skills, eye contact, making conversation more personal, and better attunement as strategies to improve your rizz. They also note that most of us have strong rizz at the start of a relationship because we tend to put in more effort and intentionality when we are pursuing a new partner. However life takes over and that focused effort often wanes leading our rizz to drop with our intimate partners. We had a lot of fun on this episode keeping up with what's hip and we hope it's a fun and playful conversation to share with your partner on increasing intentionality in your communication. Keep it hot y'all!    Check out our sponsors and help support our work educating couples! Foria Wellness -- try their excellent sex oils! Their Awaken Arousal and Sex Oil are excellent for enhancing a woman's orgasm! Try it and see! Use the link Foria or use the code 'foreplay' and get 20% off your order! Cozy Earth has the most comfortable, breathable sheets! It is like sleeping on a cloud. Use the code 'foreplay' for 35% off site-wide! Addyi.com for pharmaceutical help with female low libido.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Shame is an emotional experience that confirms our biggest insecurities. S*x is a sacred space that requires us to be naked physically, emotionally and spiritually. We don't want to think of shame here, rather we decide that s*x "should" be: passionate, spontaneous, simple yet, s*x with your intimate partner can trigger shame. Join us today as we discuss the reasons why we can feel shame around physical intimacy. George and Laurie lead listeners through a valuable conversation on what parts of an individual become exposed in this vulnerable place and how to begin to make sense of those internal messages. George reminds us that the antidote to shame is in connection and humans are not meant to face shame in isolation. We explore the deeper attachment themes present and Laurie highlights the dilemma of shame; sharing shame with a loved one increases safety but we need safety to be able to share shame. If a s*xual experience with your partner has ever felt like rejection or failure this episode is a must listen to help you understand how to address the "relationship ouch" and open up a conversation with your partner that is full of healthy relationship risk taking. Make sure to visit our website www.foreplayrst.com and leave us questions or comments in our mailbag. We want to help you bust shame and keep it hot y'all! Check out our sponsors! (It helps us pay the bills!) Dipsea -- Develop your erotic mind! Designed by women for women! An app with short, sexy stories to help you get in the mood! Go to dipseastories.com/foreplay for an extended 30 day free trial! Uberlube is our favorite lubricant for great sex! Silky, smooth, and safe! Order it today with the coupon code 'foreplay'! Addyi.com/Foreplay -- Ask your gynecologist about this drug that helps women with low libido! Everyplate.com/podcast/49foreplay -- These meals are fantastic! Simple to make, appropriately portioned, delicious! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In a relationship when we experience emotional hurt we quickly want to assign meaning to the feeling. Our brains are wired to make sense of the threat and a pang of rejection can send our thoughts spiraling. Then BAM we are in the cycle with our partner. Join us today as we help you make better and more accurate meaning to slow down this automatic process and keep you from falling head first in the negative cycle. As EFT therapists, we work to make reframes of protective behavior to help individuals expand meaning and perspective. When you can hold more space in your body for the physical sensation of an emotion you keep your brain in a neutral zone. A neutral zone will help you be open minded, think relationally and use communication skills like curiosity, understanding, validation and empathy. You will leave this episode with examples of common inaccurate meanings, why your brain does this, what to do instead and how to talk to your partner better. Head on over to our instagram page and let us know in the comments what meaning you commonly assign to your partner's behavior. We want to help you get out of this trap and love better and have better sex! Check out our sponsors! CozyEarth -- the most fantastic, softest, comfiest sheets you've ever slept on! Use the coupon code 'foreplay' to get 35% off site-wide! Addyi.com/Foreplay -- Ask your gynecologist about this drug that helps women with low libido! Rocket Money - Rocket Money can track down and cancel all those online subscriptions you've made and forgotten about that come out of your bank automatically. Save money with Rocket Money! Use the link and let them know we sent you! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices