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Sex and Psychology Podcast
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Sex and Psychology Podcast

Author: Dr. Justin Lehmiller

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The Sex and Psychology Podcast is the sex ed you never got in school—and won’t find anywhere else. Kinsey Institute researcher Dr. Justin Lehmiller takes you on a journey through the psychology of sex and relationships, offering practical tips along the way that can help you take your intimate life to the next level. Learn more on Dr. Lehmiller’s blog at sexandpsychology.com
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What goes on behind the scenes when porn is filmed? In today’s show, I’m going to be speaking with a director who has decades of experience creating adult films. We’re going to explore how she got into the business, her approach to making erotic cinema, and what she does to ensure the comfort and safety of performers. She is a pioneer in creating ethical and feminist porn, so we’re also going to talk about how her work has changed the landscape for adult films. My guest is Erika Lust, an award-winning indie erotic filmmaker who creates sex-positive adult cinema by portraying relatable characters and realistic hot sex. Over the past 20 years, Erika has directed 6 feature films and series and over 130 short films. In 2015, Erika gave a popular TEDx talk titled ‘It’s Time for Porn to Change‘. Some of the topics we discuss include: What do both Hollywood and porn get wrong when to comes to depicting sex on screen? How is Erika’s approach to making adult films different from what people might be used to seeing in porn? What kind of reaction has ethical and feminist porn received from the broader male-dominated porn industry? What has changed in the world of porn in the last two decades? You can check out Erika’s films here, and use the code “SEXANDPSYCH” for a 30% discount on the site’s content. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Reddit to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
Do you feel like work is getting in the way of your sex life? If so, you’re definitely not alone. Work can leave us tired or exhausted, heavily stressed, and highly distracted, which is a recipe for sexual problems. Maybe it’s time to set some boundaries? In today’s show, we’re going to talk all about the negative ways in which work can interfere with sex, why this happens, and how we can prevent it. We’re also going to talk about how to make sex a priority in your life so that you can harness the stress-relieving benefits of it. I am joined once again by Amanda Jepson, a Licensed Professional Counselor and ASSECT-Certified Sex Therapist. She is one of the co-founders of the non-profit Respark Foundation, a Clinical Therapist at the University of Colorado-Colorado Springs Veterans Health and Trauma Clinic, and a lecturer for the University of Colorado-Denver. Some of the specific questions we explore in this episode include: How can work-related stress interfere with sexual desire, arousal, and function? If you have a particularly high-stress job, what can you do to get your sex life back on track? What does work-life balance really look like, and is it realistic to attain? How can engaging in sex more often help us to deal with stress? What are some ways we can prioritize sex in our lives? To learn more about the Respark Foundation, you can click here to visit their website. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  The Kinsey Institute at Indiana University has been a trusted source for scientific knowledge and research on critical issues in sexuality, gender, and reproduction for over 75 years. Learn about more research and upcoming events at kinseyinstitute.org or look for them on social media @kinseyinstitute. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Reddit to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
Seventy percent of adults have experienced one or more traumatic events in their lifetime, with sexual trauma being among the most common forms. There’s a popular narrative in the media that trauma fundamentally changes our bodies and brains, which can give the impression that trauma never resolves. However, there is hope. On today’s show, we’re going to discuss how to heal and move beyond sexual trauma. We’ll also talk about tips for navigating relationships when one partner has a history of trauma. My guest is Amanda Jepson, a Licensed Professional Counselor and ASSECT-Certified Sex Therapist. She is one of the co-founders of the non-profit Respark Foundation, a Clinical Therapist at the University of Colorado-Colorado Springs Veterans Health and Trauma Clinic, and a lecturer for the University of Colorado-Denver. Some of the specific questions we explore in this episode include: What does the term “sexual trauma” mean in a clinical context? What are some of the most common impacts of sexual trauma? How can individuals who have experienced trauma learn to reconnect with their bodies? What kinds of treatments do sex therapists use in cases of sexual trauma? How do you bring up the topic of trauma with a romantic partner? How can you be a supportive partner to someone with a history of trauma? To learn more about the Respark Foundation, you can click here to visit their website. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Reddit to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
Interest in non-monogamy is on the rise, with nationally representative US surveys now finding that approximately one-third of American adults say their ideal relationship would be sexually open. But if you want to give this a try, what do you need to know? In today’s show, we’ll explore the questions to ask yourself before opening up, as well as common issues that arise in multi-partner relationships and how to deal with them. My guest is Shamyra Howard, a Licensed Clinical Social Worker and AASECT Certified Sex Therapist. She founded On The Green Couch, where she helps people manage sexual issues, create their best relationships, and have amazing sex. She is the resident Sex and Relationship Expert on the Peacock series Couple to Throuple. Some of the topics we explore in this episode include: Whether you’re currently single or in a relationship, what do you need to know before you start exploring non-monogamy? How do you set boundaries in multi-partner relationships? What can you do if jealousy pops up? If you’re practicing polyamory, how do you know when you’ve reached your saturation point? What is “new relationship energy,” and how do you prevent it from becoming an issue? What are some common red flags in poly and open relationships? Make sure to check out Shamyra’s website to learn more about her work and follow her on the socials @sexologistshamyra. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  The Kinsey Institute at Indiana University has been a trusted source for scientific knowledge and research on critical issues in sexuality, gender, and reproduction for over 75 years. Learn about more research and upcoming events at kinseyinstitute.org or look for them on social media @kinseyinstitute. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Reddit to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
Most reality dating shows follow the same formula in that they’re fundamentally about two people finding love and building a couple relationship. However, the new series Couple to Throuple offers a unique twist: viewers follow a group of queer, open-minded couples who are interested in expanding their relationships by bringing a third partner into the mix. This show has sparked a wide range of reactions among viewers, both positive and negative. So let’s talk about it! My guest is Shamyra Howard, a Licensed Clinical Social Worker and AASECT Certified Sex Therapist. She founded On The Green Couch, where she helps people manage sexual issues, create their best relationships, and have amazing sex. She is the resident Sex and Relationship Expert on the Peacock series Couple to Throuple. Some of the topics we explore in this episode include: In what ways is this show different from anything else that has come before? What is the role of a sex and relationship expert on a show like this? What were some of the biggest issues that came up as couples explored what it might look like to be a throuple? Does this show offer an accurate depiction of polyamory? How can a show like Couple to Throuple contribute to broader conversations about relationship diversity and polyamory? Make sure to check out Shamyra’s website to learn more about her work and follow her on the socials @sexologistshamyra. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  MailMyMeds is an online service that allows Americans to access prescription and affordable medication delivery services. They allow men experiencing ED to be reviewed for erectile dysfunction medication prescriptions. To learn more, visit mailmymeds.com Flure Dating App: Explore & Own Your Desires – https://flure.com *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Reddit to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
Imagine that your genitals were in a constant, uncontrollable state of arousal. You might be thinking that doesn’t sound too bad, but you’d be mistaken. Persistent genital arousal disorder (PGAD) is a highly distressing condition. People who have it live with unwanted arousal that doesn’t bring pleasure, and there’s almost no relief from it. This makes it difficult, if not impossible, to concentrate, work, and sleep. In this episode, we’re going to dive into what we know about PGAD, including how common it is, what causes it, and how it’s treated. I am joined once again by Sue W. Goldstein, an AASECT certified Sexuality Educator and Clinical Research Manager at San Diego Sexual Medicine. Ms. Goldstein co-authored the book When Sex Isn’t Good to provide education and empowerment to women with sexual dysfunction. Some of the questions we explore in this episode include: What does PGAD look like in everyday life? What kind of effects does this have on people? How long have we known about PGAD, and how common is it? What causes uncontrollable genital arousal? Are there any treatments that work? To learn more about women’s sexual health issues, check out Sue’s book here and visit Vella Biosciences. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  The Kinsey Institute at Indiana University has been a trusted source for scientific knowledge and research on critical issues in sexuality, gender, and reproduction for over 75 years. Learn about more research and upcoming events at kinseyinstitute.org or look for them on social media @kinseyinstitute. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Reddit to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
Antidepressants are notorious for their sexual side effects, including diminished sexual desire and difficulties with arousal and orgasm. It was long thought that these side effects were temporary; however, a growing number of people are reporting persistent sexual difficulties after discontinuing the medication, known as Post-SSRI Sexual Dysfunction (PSSD). In today’s show, we’re going to discuss what we know about PSSD, including how common it is, what causes it, and what we can do about it. I am joined by Sue W. Goldstein, an AASECT certified Sexuality Educator and Clinical Research Manager at San Diego Sexual Medicine. Ms. Goldstein co-authored the book When Sex Isn’t Good to provide education and empowerment to women with sexual dysfunction. Some of the questions we explore in this episode include: How many people experience sexual side effects from antidepressants? What are the most common symptoms of PSSD? Is PSSD a formal medical diagnosis? Why is PSSD controversial? Are there any gender differences in PSSD? Why might SSRIs can cause long-term sexual dysfunction? To learn more about women’s sexual health issues, check out Sue’s book here and visit Vella Biosciences. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  Factor’s delicious, ready-to-eat meals make eating better every day easy! No matter your schedule for the week, be ready with pre-prepared, chef-crafted and dietician approved meals delivered right to your door. Head to factormeals.com/sexandpsych50 and use code sexandpsych50 to get 50% off your order. Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Reddit to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
In the not too distant past, most people followed the same relationship model and settled down into monogamous marriages pretty early in life. Today, however, people are spending more and more of their adult lives single, fewer are opting to marry at all, and those who do are waiting much longer to tie the knot. In today’s show, we’re going to delve into the modern sexual landscape and look at what people really want from relationships, including their attitudes toward casual sex, monogamy, non-monogamy, and infidelity. I am joined once again by Tina Fetner, a professor of sociology at McMaster University. She is the author of the new book Sex in Canada: The Who, Why, When, and How of Getting Down Up North. Some of the topics we explore in this episode include: How much has the marriage rate changed over time? Why are adults staying single for longer periods of time? If most singles want relationships, why does everyone seem to think that they don’t want them? Why are young folks increasingly concerned with telling a partner that they want to be exclusive? How many people in relationships are practicing monogamy vs consensual non-monogamy? Make sure to check out Tina’s website to learn more and follow her on Instagram @tinafetner. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Learn to make time for what makes you happy. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/SEXANDPSYCH today to get 10% off your first month.  The Kinsey Institute at Indiana University has been a trusted source for scientific knowledge and research on critical issues in sexuality, gender, and reproduction for over 75 years. Learn about more research and upcoming events at kinseyinstitute.org or look for them on social media @kinseyinstitute. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Reddit to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
Some of the most common sex questions I’ve received from listeners over the years include, “Am I having enough sex?” and “Am I masturbating too much?” While people are often very interested in how their sex life stacks up, the truth of the matter is that comparing yourself to other people can lead us astray because “normal” doesn’t mean just one thing when it comes to sex. In this episode, we’re going to explore diversity and variability in sexual behavior frequency. My guest is Tina Fetner, a professor of sociology at McMaster University. She is the author of the new book Sex in Canada: The Who, Why, When, and How of Getting Down Up North. Some of the topics we explore in this episode include: What percentage of adults engage in masturbation? How many have never done it? How many people had sex in the last year? How often do people usually have sex? Who has more sex: people who are single or married? Why are there more adult virgins today than there used to be? Make sure to check out Tina’s website to learn more and follow her on Instagram @tinafetner. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  MailMyMeds is an online service that allows Americans to access prescription and affordable medication delivery services. They allow men experiencing ED to be reviewed for erectile dysfunction medication prescriptions. To learn more, visit mailmymeds.com Whether you’re just a few dates in or have been together a long time, it’s time to lighten the mood and have fun with your partner by using Paired. Head over to paired.com/justin to get a 7-day free trial and 25% off if you sign up for a subscription. Connect with your partner every day using Paired. A happier relationship starts here! Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Reddit to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
If you start scrolling through Instagram or TikTok, it’s only a matter of time before you’ll come across some anti-masturbation content. You’re likely to hear that masturbation is bad for your health, that it’s addictive, and that you should just say no to self-pleasure. In today’s show, we’re going to delve into what the science says about popular claims regarding the health benefits of semen retention, whether abstaining from masturbation actually boosts testosterone, whether you can really become “addicted” to masturbating, and so much more. I am joined once again by Dr. Eric Sprankle, an Associate Professor of Clinical Psychology and the co-director of the Sexuality Studies program at Minnesota State University, Mankato. He’s also a licensed clinical psychologist and AASECT-certified sex therapist affiliated with the Minnesota Sexual Health Institute. His latest book is titled, DIY: The Wonderfully Weird History and Science of Masturbation. Some of the topics we explore in this episode include: How (and why) have social media influences brought the idea of semen retention to the masses? Are there actually any health benefits to abstaining from ejaculation? Is an orgasm obtained from self-pleasure really any different from an orgasm obtained through partnered sex? Can women really become “addicted” to their vibrators? Is there an objective standard for what constitutes “too much” masturbation? Make sure to check out Eric’s website to learn more and follow him on the socials @drsprankle. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  Private Internet Access VPN is the world’s most transparent VPN provider. They let you stay private online by hiding your IP address and encrypting your internet connection. Head over to PIAVPN.com/SexAndPsychology and get an 83% discount! That’s just $2.03/month and you get 4 extra months completely free. Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Reddit to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
Human beings have a long and complicated history with masturbation. Although it was originally pursued without care or consequence, self-pleasure eventually came to be seen as a pathway to disease and one of the gravest sins you could commit. In today’s show, we’re going to explore the wacky history of masturbation, which is a timely topic because we’re currently in the midst of a social media fueled war on self-pleasure. I am joined by Dr. Eric Sprankle, an Associate Professor of Clinical Psychology and the co-director of the Sexuality Studies program at Minnesota State University, Mankato. He’s also a licensed clinical psychologist and AASECT-certified sex therapist affiliated with the Minnesota Sexual Health Institute. His latest book is titled, DIY: The Wonderfully Weird History and Science of Masturbation. Some of the topics we explore in this episode include: Where did the idea of masturbation as a sinful activity originate? What are some of the ways religious leaders have tried to discourage self-pleasure over the years? When did masturbation start to become a public health concern, and why? Why does self-pleasure continue to be a controversial topic to this day? How has the rise of social media coincided with a rise in negative views on masturbation? Make sure to check out Eric’s website to learn more and follow him on the socials @drsprankle. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  MailMyMeds is an online service that allows Americans to access prescription and affordable medication delivery services. They allow men experiencing ED to be reviewed for erectile dysfunction medication prescriptions. To learn more, visit mailmymeds.com Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Reddit to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
People today are having less sex compared to generations past, but a greater proportion of the sex we’re having is casual. However, casual sex is something people have a lot of mixed experiences with, which points to a need for better education around it. So that’s what today’s show is all about. We’re going to explore how to set boundaries in casual relationships, the kinds of boundaries that are worth considering, the questions you should be asking yourself before you have casual sex, how to avoid awkwardness, and more. I am joined once again by Gabrielle Kassel. She is a sex and wellness journalist committed to helping people feel the best they can in their bodies. Her work has appeared in publications such as Men’s Health, Shape, Cosmopolitan, Well+Good, Self, Women’s Health, and more! Some of the topics we explore in this episode include: What does it really mean to have “casual” sex anyway? What are the potential positive and negatives of casual sex? How do you know if casual sex is right for you? How do you establish boundaries with a partner you don’t know very well? What might a good model for communicating and maintaining sexual health look like if you’re in a casual relationship? How do you prevent drama in casual relationships? Make sure to check out Gabrielle’s website to learn more. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  Flure Dating App: Explore & Own Your Desires – https://flure.com The Kinsey Institute at Indiana University has been a trusted source for scientific knowledge and research on critical issues in sexuality, gender, and reproduction for over 75 years. Learn about more research and upcoming events at kinseyinstitute.org or look for them on social media @kinseyinstitute. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Reddit to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
There are literally tens of thousands of different sex toys out there to choose from, so how do you pick the toy that’s right for you? In today’s show, we’re going to talk about where to start when it comes to selecting adult toys and pleasure products, what to look for in terms of optimizing your own health and pleasure, whether it’s worth splurging on luxury toys, and so much more. My guest is Gabrielle Kassel. She is a sex and wellness journalist committed to helping people feel the best they can in their bodies. Her work has appeared in publications such as Men’s Health, Shape, Cosmopolitan, Well+Good, Self, Women’s Health, and more! Some of the topics we explore in this episode include: Why is lube a great starting place for exploring toys? What should people be looking for when it comes to buying a lube that’s going to work for them? What are the different materials that are used to make sex toys, and what should you be looking for? If you’re new to buying vibrators, masturbation sleeves, or anal toys, what do you need to know for picking a good one? Are luxury sex toys worth it? Make sure to check out Gabrielle’s website to learn more. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  MailMyMeds is an online service that allows Americans to access prescription and affordable medication delivery services. They allow men experiencing ED to be reviewed for erectile dysfunction medication prescriptions. To learn more, visit mailmymeds.com Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Reddit to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
What are men’s and women’s most common sexual problems? And what can we do to address them? That’s what we’re going to be talking about on today’s show. I’m going to pick a urologist’s brain about the biggest sexual difficulties that she sees in her office and what her approach is to helping patients resolve them. Topics we’ll explore include premature ejaculation, erectile dysfunction, painful sex, and difficulty reaching orgasm. I am joined once again by Dr. Fenwa Milhouse, a board-certified, fellowship-trained urologist. Dr. Milhouse practices in Chicago, IL and treats a wide range of adults with sexual difficulties and sexual health concerns. She currently sits on the board of the Chicago Urological Society, and is widely known in the media as “Your Favorite Urologist.” Dr. Milhouse is the star of TLC network’s Dr. Down Below. Some of the questions we discuss include: What would be a sign that someone needs to see a urologist for a sexual difficulty as opposed to another doctor or specialist? How can men delay orgasm and increase sexual stamina? What are some ways to improve erectile function to reduce the risk of erectile difficulties developing? What are some of the most common reasons for painful sex, and what are some potential ways of addressing them? What can you do if you seem to have a hard time reaching orgasm? Make sure to check out Fenwa’s website to learn more and follow her on IG at @DrMilhouse. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  Factor’s delicious, ready-to-eat meals make eating better every day easy! No matter your schedule for the week, be ready with pre-prepared, chef-crafted and dietician approved meals delivered right to your door. Head to factormeals.com/sexandpsych50 and use code sexandpsych50 to get 50% off your order. The Kinsey Institute at Indiana University has been a trusted source for scientific knowledge and research on critical issues in sexuality, gender, and reproduction for over 75 years. Learn about more research and upcoming events at kinseyinstitute.org or look for them on social media @kinseyinstitute. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Reddit to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
One of men’s biggest sexual concerns is whether their penis is big enough. In fact, nearly half of adult men report dissatisfaction with their size, almost all of whom wish they were larger. This has led a growing number of men to explore what they can do to make their penises bigger, and an entire industry has popped up hoping to capitalize on this. In today’s episode, we’re going to explore the many and varied approaches to penile augmentation, including which ones are supported by the science and the potential risks and rewards. My guest is Dr. Fenwa Milhouse, a board-certified, fellowship-trained urologist. Dr. Milhouse practices in Chicago, IL and treats a wide range of adults with sexual difficulties and sexual health concerns. She currently sits on the board of the Chicago Urological Society, and is widely known in the media as “Your Favorite Urologist.” Dr. Milhouse is the star of TLC network’s Dr. Down Below. Some of the topics we explore in this episode include: Do any of the pills that promise to make your penis bigger actually work? Is there any benefit to penile stretching? How can penis rings and pumps help men who are worried about their size? Can dermal filler help to increase penis size? How does it work? If you’re concerned about your penis size, what do you really need to know? Make sure to check out Fenwa’s website to learn more and follow her on IG at @DrMilhouse. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  Whether you’re just a few dates in or have been together a long time, it’s time to lighten the mood and have fun with your partner by using Paired. Head over to paired.com/justin to get a 7-day free trial and 25% off if you sign up for a subscription. Connect with your partner every day using Paired. A happier relationship starts here! Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Reddit to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
Most of us could benefit from having a little more pleasure in our lives, both in and out of the bedroom. However, we’re not getting that pleasure for many reasons, including the fact that we lead busy lives and just struggle to find time for it. So it’s time to change our mindset around pleasure and to start making it a priority. My guest today likes to say that you should do something that brings you pleasure everyday, so we’re going to explore how to do that. I am joined once again by award-winning sexuality educator Dr. Shemeka Thorpe. She is an assistant professor of health promotion at the University of Kentucky. Dr. Thorpe has published over 50 peer-reviewed articles and her work has been featured extensively in the media. In 2023, Buzzfeed listed her as one of the top 20 Black sexologists you should follow. Some of the topics we explore in this episode include: What is pleasure? What are the benefits of seeking pleasure beyond just feeling good? How can we start to shift our mindset around pleasure and start to prioritize it without feeling guilty? What are ways to be more present during moments of pleasure so that we can really enjoy them? How can we have more pleasurable sex? Make sure to check out Dr. Shemeka’s website to learn more about her work and follow her on Instagram at @DrShemeka. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  Flure Dating App: Explore & Own Your Desires – https://flure.com The Kinsey Institute at Indiana University has been a trusted source for scientific knowledge and research on critical issues in sexuality, gender, and reproduction for over 75 years. Learn about more research and upcoming events at kinseyinstitute.org or look for them on social media @kinseyinstitute. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Reddit to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
A surprising amount of sexuality research isn’t very sex-positive, and this is especially true when you look at sex research on minority populations. Historically, most of it has been focused on risks, such as STIs, unintended pregnancies, or risky sexual practices. While there’s certainly value to that work, when it becomes the predominant focus, it really inhibits our understanding of diverse people and sexualities. In today’s show, we’re going to focus on Black women’s sexuality and explore what sex-positive research focused on this population can tell us. My guest is award-winning sexuality educator Dr. Shemeka Thorpe. She is an assistant professor of health promotion at the University of Kentucky. Dr. Thorpe has published over 50 peer-reviewed articles and her work has been featured extensively in the media. In 2023, Buzzfeed listed her as one of the top 20 Black sexologists you should follow. Some of the topics we explore in this episode include: How unbalanced is the study of sexuality when it comes to minority populations? Why is talking about race as a “risk factor” a problematic way of approaching sex research? How do Black women (and men) conceptualize pleasure? How common is sexual pain in Black women, and how do social and racialized expectations and scripts affect how pain is experienced for them? How does sexual fantasy and desire vary across racial and ethnic groups? How can we promote better, more equitable sex education and research? Make sure to check out Dr. Shemeka’s website to learn more about her work and follow her on Instagram at @DrShemeka. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Reddit to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
With Valentine’s Day being this month, love is in the air. So let’s talk about some tips for maintaining happy and healthy loving relationships all year long! In today’s show, we’re revisiting one of Sex and Psychology’s Essential Listens, which is my interview with Dr. Terri Orbuch from Episode 73. We’ll talk about what you need to know, whether you’ve been together for a short or long time. We’ll also explore how to know when it’s lust or love, and so much more. Dr. Terri Orbuch is a distinguished professor at Oakland University and a research scientist at the University of Michigan’s Institute for Social Research. She is an author, speaker, and therapist known widely in the media as The Love Doctor for giving practical, science-based relationship advice. Her latest book is called “Secrets to Surviving Your Children’s Love Relationships.” Some of the topics we discuss include: How do you know whether you’re really in love with someone? What’s the difference between lust and love? Is there value in the love languages concept? How can individuals make sure their partners know they love them? When is the right time to announce a new relationship? How do we dial down the pressure and make Valentine’s Day feel like fun instead of work? Make sure to check out Terri’s website to learn more. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  Whether you’re just a few dates in or have been together a long time, it’s time to lighten the mood and have fun with your partner by using Paired. Head over to paired.com/justin to get a 7-day free trial and 25% off if you sign up for a subscription. Connect with your partner every day using Paired. A happier relationship starts here! This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Become your own soulmate whether you’re looking for one or not. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/SEXANDPSYCH today to get 10% off your first month.  *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Reddit to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
What are the keys to sexual and relationship satisfaction? It turns out that some of the most popular ideas out there about what makes for a healthy and happy intimate life just aren’t backed up by the science. So let’s explore what the data actually say when it comes to cultivating satisfying sex lives and relationships. In this show, we’ll answer questions such as whether having more sex will make you happier, whether spontaneous sex is better than planned sex, whether too much closeness inhibits desire, and more. I am joined once again by Dr. Amy Muise. She is an Assistant Professor and York Research Chair at York University. She is Director of the Sexual Health and Relationship (SHaRe) Lab. She has published 121 articles and book chapters and has been awarded over $2.9 million dollars in research funding. Some of the topics we explore in this episode include: Is more sex necessarily better sex? How do people really feel about spontaneous sex and planned sex? Is sex that happens spontaneously actually better? What’s the link between closeness/intimacy and sexual desire? There’s this idea that women are the barometers of relationship satisfaction in heterosexual relationships (“happy wife, happy life”). Is there any truth to this? What are the costs and benefits of making sexual compromises in a relationship? Make sure to check out SHaRe’s website and Instagram to stay up-to-date on their work. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  Flure Dating App: Explore & Own Your Desires – https://flure.com Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Reddit to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
A growing number of people are living alone by choice—they simply prefer to live on their own. Many of them still have sex and relationships, but only on their own terms. They want freedom from the constraints of relationship labels and expectations, plus the ability to retain their autonomy and enjoy solitude when they want it. These folks are part of a growing movement and identity called “solos.” In today’s show, we’re going to explore what it means to go solo and how to live your best solo life. I am joined once again by Peter McGraw, a business school professor at the University of Colorado Boulder. He hosts the podcast Solo—The Single Person’s Guide to a Remarkable Life, he writes for Single Insights—The Science of Solos, and he hosts The Solo Salon. In 2014, Peter co-authored a book called The Humor Code. His latest book is titled Solo. Some of the topics we explore in this episode include: What’s the difference between being solo and being single? What are some of the different ways of being solo? Are there certain types of individuals who may be more well-suited to pursuing the solo life? How do solos engage in the process of relationship design? What does that look like? What are some of the keys to being solo and flourishing? Make sure to check out Peter’s website to learn more about his work. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology *** Thank you to our sponsors!  The Kinsey Institute at Indiana University has been a trusted source for scientific knowledge and research on critical issues in sexuality, gender, and reproduction for over 75 years. Learn about more research and upcoming events at kinseyinstitute.org or look for them on social media @kinseyinstitute. I’m excited to announce a new edition of my textbook, The Psychology of Human Sexuality! This is the third edition of the book, and it’s the biggest and best version yet. The Psychology of Human Sexuality is a comprehensive guide to the major theories and perspectives on sexuality and the vast diversity in sexual attitudes and behaviors that exist around the world. You can check it out here. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Reddit to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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Comments (7)

Amanda Osuna

I actually have a great orgasm alone way beter than with a partner. It can be very intense. however there are times when I feel no stimulation at all and unable to climax. Great show I always learn alot , keep up the good work.

Nov 14th
Reply

P M

Men are not flocking to Andrew Tate because they feel rejected by society. They're doing it because the patriarchy has raised them to hate women. Now that women are starting to push back on all bullshit (as they've always done), these men who already hated women flock to Andrew Tate because he encourages their pre-existing misogynistic ways of thinking..

Oct 27th
Reply

Ainslie crawford

only 12 mins in and have already learnt a LOT that I should be thinking about

Feb 21st
Reply

Sara MacKay

great episode! gave me some good ideas!

Sep 5th
Reply

Kaveh Karami

such a great and informative conversation, love your work as always

Jun 4th
Reply

Sanne Høybye

Love Dr. Lehmiller! As a psychologist I m learning so much about human natur in a fun an easy going way :)

May 20th
Reply

Shelle M

Yes definitely get that moment of clarity. You took the words out of my mouth 'clarity' I was thinking as you started describing that. Definitely a happy brain moment.

Jan 22nd
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