The Mel Robbins Podcast

In today’s episode, I’m sharing the “6 magic words” that I say to myself on repeat whenever I start to spiral.I call them “magic” because they seem to have an almost spell-like effect on me when I say them out loud.I’ve shared these 6 magic words with millions of people online, and today you’re going to learn what they are and how to use them to your advantage.If you're a worrier, an overthinker, or struggle with anxiety, you’ll love these 6 words.You can use them like a tool to stop yourself from worrying, obsessing, catastrophizing, and creating problems in your mind that don’t exist in the present moment.These 6 words are rooted in behavioral science, psychology, stoicism, and even Buddhism. In fact, I’m going to share a fantastic metaphor to make this even more visual and easy to understand and apply in your life.You will also learn:How to use my 6-word phrase to interrupt your worries and self-doubt.The question you can ask yourself to beat fear with logic.A beautiful Buddhist teaching that will empower you to stop torturing yourself mentally.A shocking study about how stressful thoughts cause you real pain.What “positive ideation” is and why you need to use it the next time you start to spiral.What the data says about your worries (my jaw was on the floor).Exactly how to train your brain to be more optimistic.Bottom line: You have the power to quiet anxious thoughts and to stop the endless loop of worries that run through your head.You just need the 6 magic words I’m about to teach you right now.Xo, Mel In this episode:0:44: I’ve got something I want to confess to you.4:46: What is the ONE thing we all do?5:13: You are creating worry and stress in your life. This is exactly how to stop.6:49: How to use my 6-word phrase to interrupt your worries and self-doubt.9:18: The question you can ask yourself to beat fear with logic.12:10: A beautiful Buddhist teaching that will empower you to stop torturing yourself.13:46: Pain is inevitable; suffering is optional. Listen to this.16:16: Assuming the worst is doing this to your nervous system.18:39: What would your life be like if you didn’t worry about…anything?21:38: This is exactly how to break the habit of chronic worry.24:55: The shocking connection between catastrophizing and your ability to focus.31:06: Wait until you hear how stressful thoughts cause you real pain.34:06: How do you start living to your fullest potential once and for all?  Want more resources? Go to my podcast page at https://melrobbins.com/podcast.  Disclaimer

In today’s episode, we are trying something new, and absolutely anything goes. You’ve been flooding my inbox with questions, problems, sticky situations, and big, big dreams and goals. So today, because you asked, I am going to show up and deliver the hard truth, the surprising advice, the tricks to get you out of any pickle, and the inspiration that you need to take that next step. Nothing is off the table. So don’t f***ing blame me when I tell you how it is.  I’ve got a pile of hundreds and thousands of YOUR questions, and I’m giving you the coaching you need. This might be my favorite episode I ever recorded. We are going to cover:When it’s time to walk away from a friendship (hint: when these 2 things disappear).How it’s about damn time you stop dating for potential.How to use the ‘Let Them Theory’ to protect your energy.ONE tool you need to make decisions without overthinking.What’s keeping you from getting a raise or promotion, and more importantly, what should you do to get it.How to get someone you love to go to therapy (and when it’s time to walk away).Why a mid-life crisis is actually your greatest opportunity.  Oh, and we will cover my favorite swear word for the season (I can’t write it here, so you’ll have to listen). You will laugh with me in this episode, and you will also get advice you need to hear. But don’t blame me if it is TMI—you asked for it! Xo, Mel P.S. If any little ones are listening, put those headphones on! In this episode: 1:40: How do you know when to walk away from a friendship?9:00: How do you make decisions without overthinking?10:20: How do women negotiate a fair salary with a boss?11:55: Mel, what were your dreams when you were a girl?14:40: How do you get someone to go to therapy when they need it?25:50: How can you be vulnerable with word vomiting everything?26:30: Mel, what’s your favorite swear word?28:20: You need to hear the advice I give about the BS of a ‘mid-life crisis’.30:50: Betsy’s husband is missing out on life, and she needs help.  Want more resources? Go to my podcast page at https://melrobbins.com/podcast. Disclaimer

In this episode, researcher, respected expert on intermittent fasting, and bestselling author of Fast Like A Girl, Dr. Mindy Pelz, is here to explain fasting—and, in particular, how it impacts women’s hormone health. Men and women’s hormones are different, and because of that, women MUST fast differently than men. Dr. Mindy is the first person who explained this to me, and this is why I wanted to have her on. I had no idea that fasting would screw up my estrogen and progesterone. Why? Because I first learned about fasting from a male. When I tried intermittent fasting, I wasn’t seeing the health benefits that everyone talks about. Now I know why. You’ve seen fasting advice trending on TikTok and in health articles; even your friends are talking about it (just like mine), and after this episode you will know exactly what fasting is, why you might want to do it, and what every woman needs to know to get started. I want you to get the right information from a respected female expert in this field. Everyone needs to hear this.  This conversation is loaded with research and resources, and as always, extensive show notes are available on melrobbins.com. You can find them for this episode here. (www.melrobbins.com/podcasts/episode-103) Today, Dr. Mindy Pelz reveals: The scientific protocols you need so you can fast the right way.How to fast with your 28- to 30-day cycle for hormonal, physical, and mental health (and what to do if you’ve lost your cycle, like me).The hormone science about how the female body operates (no one talks about this).How to manage PMS and why intermittent fasting may help.The research that explains why fasting tanks your progesteroneHow this relates to you if you are in menopause and have an irregular cycle.What the 30-day reset is, and its powerful ability to transform your health.How to incorporate fasting into your life (and never miss a good meal with your family and friends).Why coffee doesn’t break a fast, but a frappuccino does.3 hacks to get started with a fast that will make your fasts more successful.The 6 fasting windows and their unique and extraordinary health benefits. We are going to focus on the step-by-step guide for women, what to do, and why this matters, but we do cover fasting protocols and how-to advice that both genders need to know. I learned so much from Dr. Mindy, and as with all episodes, this is a free resource where you get to learn straight from somebody who has literally written the book on this topic.  I would definitely send this to absolutely anyone that needs to hear it. Xo, Mel  IMPORTANT: This podcast discusses fasting, and its advice may not be suitable for anyone with an eating disorder. If you have an existing health condition, are pregnant or nursing, or are taking medication, always consult your healthcare practitioner before going for prolonged periods without eating. In this episode: 1:30: What exactly IS fasting and what is the purpose? (Hint: It’s NOT a diet trend.)5:45: What does fasting look like for a PhD who studies fasting?7:15: What’s okay to include during your fasting window?8:15: 3 simple hacks to help you get started with fasting.13:00: Who is fasting NOT for?16:10 Here’s how you may feel when you first try fasting.17:50: Women need to fast differently than men.18:45: How your hormones are impacted by intermittent fasting.25:00: Why most women were not successful when fasting was first introduced.30:15: How do you figure out your menstrual cycle if you use an IUD?34:20: Menopausal women can use the moon for what?38:50: 4 steps to determine which of the 6 types of fasting works best for you.42:00: How to make intermittent fasting more flexible.45:00: Limit these 3 foods when you’re fasting.47:50: 4 ways to break a fast. Want more resources? Go to my podcast page at melrobbins.com/podcast. Disclaimer 

In this episode, renowned holistic health expert and intermittent fasting devotee Dr. Mindy Pelz is here to explain the 101 of fasting for better health. You’ll learn the empowering science behind why it works and how it can help you achieve so many health goals. Dr. Mindy is fascinated by our body’s ability to "heal itself" and how fasting protocols can activate some remarkable results based on extensive research studies. If you’re tired of diets that leave you feeling like sh*t, health improvements that cost money, or just hate feeling out of control of your body, this is the one zero-cost tool that could have a significant impact on your health. Dr. Mindy is on a mission to help people understand and harness their healing abilities through fasting. And today, she’s told all the Olympic athletes, Academy Award-winning actors, and Silicon Valley CEOs that she works with to step aside because she’s got an appointment with someone more important: you. This episode is a guide to 6 recommended and researched fasting protocols. You’ll learn about each one and how they unleash your body’s natural ability to heal itself, reset the gut, and even get rid of damaged cells in the body.  Dr. Mindy breaks it all down with significant research, stories, and shocking statistics.  She’ll teach you:What fasting even is and why it’s different from a "diet".The 6 different fasting protocols and their researched-backed benefits.The 3 easiest ways to start fasting at any point.What the two energy systems in your body are and how fasting helps you tap into both.What is biologically happening when you follow a fasting protocol?What Keto really stands for and why the term "Keto-friendly" can’t be trusted.The 9 cellular healing benefits of fasting and how it can help cure disease.The fasting protocol that will help you lose belly fat (for good).  I can’t wait for you to learn from Dr. Mindy about this free tool that may just be what you’ve been looking for. Get ready to feel empowered. Xo, Mel IMPORTANT: This podcast discusses fasting, and its advice may not be suitable for anyone with an eating disorder. If you have an existing health condition, are pregnant or nursing, or are taking medication, always consult your healthcare practitioner before going for prolonged periods without eating.In this episode, you’ll learn:4:40: According to the research, what does fasting do?5:30: Here’s why fasting is such a passion for Dr. Mindy Pelz.7:20: So how does fasting work exactly?10:00: Our bodies have two energy systems, but we only use one.12:15: What is autophagy and why should I care?14:00: When your body isn’t making ketones, you’re missing a key component of health.17:30: The surprising places most of the fasting research comes from.20:40: Science recommends intermittent fasting as a first line of treatment.21:45: This is why fasting is NOT a dieting trend.25:00: Here’s how fasting melts calories, no matter what you eat.28:20: Got cravings? This is where they come from and how you can control them.31:00: Ignore “keto-friendly” marketing; eat this food instead.33:00: Fasting is not for pregnant and nursing women, or people with eating disorders.35:10: What about my coffee?37:15: Describing the 6 different types of fasting.39:50: I want to make this idea of fasting easy for you.45:40: When your body makes a ketone, it also makes the calming GABA hormone.48:00: Let’s unpack autophagy and who exactly that is for.54:40: How do intestinal stem cells make a difference to your health?55:35: Is it even safe to fast for 36 hours, and why on earth do I want to do that?58:30: Feeling anxious? Give this type of intermittent fasting a try.60:30: Research found that fasting chemo patients had healthier white blood cells.  Want more resources? Go to my podcast page at melrobbins.com/podcast.  Disclaimer

Lately, I’ve been getting a ton of questions from listeners about how to best support high schoolers and 20-somethings. There are lots of questions about anxiety, peer pressure, and getting young adults to open up. So, in this episode, I have a pile of your questions in front of me as my son, Oakley, and I go through them rapid-fire style, so you get both of our perspectives on the topics everyone worries about but is too afraid to talk about.I have to say, Oakley really showed up for this conversation for you. He has hilarious and heartfelt thoughts on topics he has first-hand experience with. We cover it all. From academic pressure to body image to bullying, this conversation is full of tools and strategies and is raw, unfiltered, and filled with relatable stories (and only a few f-bombs).You will learn:What teens and 20-somethings really need (and don’t need) from their parents.(If you only get one thing from this episode, make it this…)How to encourage the young men in your life to open up.The ONLY thing you need to do when your young adults come home in a bad mood.How to get unhooked from toxic popularity and cliques and find your people in school or in life.3 smart strategies to use when your child is getting bullied that will strengthen your bond with your kid.An 18-year-old's surprising take on when to give your kid a cellphone.The must-use hacks for introverts who want to be more confident in school.How to get your kid to do chores (and still like you).Strategies for handling your kid’s anxiety without yelling or freaking out.The best way to navigate curfews and late-night parties with your teen. I can’t wait for you to hear this. I loved the questions and the advice. And as a mom, I couldn’t be more proud of Oak for how much wisdom he shared.I’d love for you to listen with your teens and 20-somethings. In fact, at the end of the episode, Oakley gives specific advice (including exactly what to say) to get your kids to listen. Xo, Mel In this episode, you’ll learn:1:20: Why is it so hard to get my teen to open up to me?4:00: Your kids need quiet time at these two times of the day.7:22: Here’s what to say to start a conversation with your child.9:30: How should your kids handle clique groups?11:00: How can you tell who "your" people are?12:15: Three strategies to help your kid deal with hurtful behaviors.17:30: What teens need (and don’t need) from their parents.21:45: At what age do you think your teen should have a phone?23:30: My high school senior has no idea what she wants to major in.26:00: Two best hacks for introverted teens everywhere.28:45: How can you help your kids find their friends?34:00: My teen is a senior in high school, but he still has chores at home.36:30: Oakley gives you a peek into his own anxiety to help your anxious teen.41:20: How do you reassure your kid when he’s dyslexic?42:45: The gold-standard tutoring program we used to help Oakley with his dyslexia.44:20: Two simple hacks that have made a big difference for Oakley in school.45:30: The two qualities I think of first when it comes to curfews.47:00: Here was my #1 desire for my Vermont home when it came to my kids.49:40: I literally sat Oakley’s friends down and laid down two rules for hanging out.52:40: So how do you get your teen to listen to this interview?  Want more resources? Go to my podcast resource page at melrobbins.com/podcast.  Disclaimer

In today’s episode, I welcome back KC Davis, therapist, and bestselling author. The episode before this featured her relatable, hilarious, and breakthrough ideas about everything from laundry to loading a dishwasher and giving yourself the freaking break that you deserve. That episode was so insanely popular, we moved this up in the queue.  The verdict is in. You love KC Davis. So today she's answering your deeply personal and surprising questions.  In just 50 minutes, KC’s genius hacks and smart approach to everyday tasks will not only help you manage your to-do list, but give you back the time to rest without feeling guilty.  She also reveals the single most helpful item you can bring to someone when they are going through a very difficult time. You ask the questions and she's giving you the step-by-step plan. She covers so much it’s hard to summarize, but here is my best attempt: The shocking truth about “getting everything done”Why you need to stop saying you’re fine - you’re BETTER than fineHow to divide chores at home (yes, there is a right way!)Her “Fair Rest” rule for couples7 genius tips to build momentum (stop waiting for motivation)The ONE thing to do for a family or friend who is struggling with grief or depression (don’t cook them a meal)Her unique take on self-compassion that will leave you in actionHow to maximize your free time so you can finally start that project (you know, that one you keep thinking about) or collapse on the couch and do nothing Steal her scripts and her hacks.  You asked for more time with KC Davis, and we delivered.  Thanks for sharing this with all your friends and family that need it.  Xo, Mel In this episode, you’ll learn:2:00: What does the research say about motivation?4:00: Let’s unpack what happens when you have ZERO motivation.8:20: Shame causes paralysis, so cultivate this emotion instead.10:30: Here’s how to look at your home when you have chronic illness.13:20: Let’s role play what to do when you feel overwhelmed.14:50: Here’s what KC wants every parent of an autistic child to hear.19:00: Hate how you look and feel? This best-friend advice is for you.21:00: Can we please take a look at your closet and do this?25:50: Wait, self-esteem is overrated? Here’s what to focus on instead.27:45: Our hustle culture makes us feel guilty about doing this one essential thing.31:15:The one question to ask yourself that will give you the break you deserve.35:00: Feeling guilty about using paper plates? You need to hear this.37:00: Reframing how you divide labor in your home will change everything.44:20: What’s your response when your partner doesn’t meet your expectations?47:15: The greatest gift I ever received during my postpartum depression.48:40: How can you help someone really struggling?  Want more resources? Go to my podcast page at melrobbins.com.  Disclaimer

In today’s episode, best-selling author and therapist KC Davis answers the question, "How can you be successful in many areas of your life but fall short on getting the laundry, dishes, or grocery shopping done?" Which begs the question: why are all the "little tasks" so hard?! Because when it’s time to get them done, they don’t "feel" so little. KC’s advice, breakthrough ideas, and research will make you realize you’re not the only one who feels like you’re drowning. And her compassionate, hilarious approach and simple tools will help you take better care of your home and yourself immediately. If you’ve ever said: Why can’t I get it all done?Why does everyone else do this without a struggle, and I am FAILING?I should really have my act together…. All the answers you need are in this episode. And if you (or someone you love) is having a moment where even taking a shower or brushing your teeth feels like climbing Mount Everest, KC Davis is an angel sent from the heavens to lift you up. This is one of my favorite conversations of all time. It’s so wide-ranging in topics and deeply relatable, laugh-out-loud funny, poignant, and actionable. Talking to KC is like having an old friend show up at your house with a mug of tea, a mop, and a casserole you can stick in the fridge. There are so many life-changing realizations that will restore your sanity—and the functionality of your home—that this is only Part One of your time with KC and me. Today’s episode will change your entire life. You will learn: A shocking approach to laundry and anything else in life that changes everything. (This one is so goooood!)3 rules for self-care made simpleA 5-step tidying method that will improve your lifeA genius trick for when the dishes or laundry are piled sky-highKC’s "momentum-building trick" that will make your brain work for youMaking relaxation your right, not your rewardLeveraging self-compassion as a motivational toolKC’s favorite phrase to say when she feels overwhelmed  My mission today is to prove to you that if you don’t have your sh*t together, you aren’t broken. You’re just like the rest of us – you’re human.   Get ready to laugh and learn as I confess the details of what a disaster I am at home, as we go step-by-step with instructions and affirmations for an empowering and gentle journey to a functioning space. Xo, Mel In this episode, you’ll learn:3:30: Why is it sometimes so hard to do even the small things?5:30: This is why you feel so much guilt when you’re not getting it all done.9:15: Your disappointment in yourself goes so much deeper than chores.10:30: Here’s what your piles of laundry say about you. OR don’t.21:30: I confess; this is the only time I’m motivated to do laundry.23:00: Who knew what a WIN it was every time you make it to the shower?35:00: Here’s how brushing your teeth can creep up on you in insidious ways.37:30: Research shows that drowning in shame arrests our psychological functioning.41:45: Alternatives to showers when you just don’t have it in you.45:00: How can you make your space calm?48:00: This reframe of your household chores will change your life.51:00: Ditch the guilt and shame when you realize you didn’t sign up for this.52:30: Here’s why emptying the dishwasher is way worse than loading it.54:00: KC found a system for her laundry and that changed everything.57:00: Here’s a new way to look at tasks when every task feels monumental.  Want more resources? Go to my podcast page at melrobbins.com.  Disclaimer

You need to hear today’s episode. I have something profound to share with you. It is a deeply personal message, straight from my heart to yours. This is not a pep talk. It’s not a motivational speech. This is a goddamn wake-up call. Your life is like a melting ice cube. Your excuses are endless, but time isn’t. Stop waiting for the perfect time.  Stop waiting to feel ready. While you’ve been full of excuses, waiting for someday to come, time has been passing you by. So, if you’re sick of standing still or talking yourself out of the changes you want to make and the goals you dream of achieving, this one's for you. My mission is to make today the someday you’ve been waiting for. This is the coaching you need. And you need to hear it right now. Xo, Mel In this episode:3:30: Can you relate to Cathy’s self-doubt?6:15: If you hear anything today, let it be this.10:55: This is how you actually reach your goals.12:35: Worried about what others will think of you? Listen to this.13:25: Steps 1 and 2 when you have a dream you want to make REAL.15:00: Stop wasting your time and energy on this.18:20: Frozen because you don’t have experience? 23:00: Is your schedule already full? Switch your mindset this way.28:40: I told myself the very same excuses you do!32:30: Filling your time with things that have nothing to do with your goals? 34:00: How do you start focusing on yourself once and for all? Want more resources? Go to my podcast page at melrobbins.com. Disclaimer

In today’s episode, you and I are discussing the fascinating science of secrets: why you keep them and how keeping secrets directly impacts your relationships, your self-esteem, your health, and holds you back from living the life you deserve. Dr. Michael Slepian is a bestselling author, psychologist, associate professor of leadership and ethics at Columbia Business School, and former scholar at Stanford. He has been researching secrets for over a decade and will help you understand what secrets are, why we keep them, and the harm of holding them inside. Dr. Slepian's research is shocking: studies prove you are keeping 13 secrets right now. 5 of which you’ve never told a single person. Not your mom. Not your best friend. No one. Even more shocking is the impact they have on your life. My mission today is to help you free yourself of the burden of secrets. Listen and you’ll understand how the secrets we have shape our physical and psychological well-being, who we are, how we connect with others, and how we cope with our challenges. You will also learn: The most common secret that 61% of you are keeping right now.Why you always feel shame, isolation, and uncertainty when you keep a secret.The fundamental difference between secrecy and privacy, and why privacy is better for your health and relationships.Why the shame of secrecy kills your self-esteem.How to use guilt to get rid of shame (yup).How babies learn to keep secrets from their parents and caregivers.The one person you should REALLY tell your secret to. Keeping a secret is the easy part; the hard part is having to live with it. Let’s change that today. Xo, MelIn this episode:2:00: The jaw-dropping secret that inspired this conversation today.9:45: Curious about the kinds of secrets people keep? Here are the top 10.11:50: How exactly do we define a secret?14:45: Are there any good secrets?15:45: Don’t feel too bad; we’re not the only animals that keep secrets.18:00: Keeping the secret isn’t the hard part; the hardest part is this.21:00: Listen to the secrets my listeners revealed. Recognize yourself?24:45: Some secrets are no big deal but we make them big in our heads.28:00: So what’s the difference between privacy and a secret?31:00: Here’s how to frame a mistake, instead of feeling shame.33:30: Research finds keeping serious secrets as kids can impact us as adults.35:30: Here’s what parents should say when their kids admit a secret to them.38:00: What do you say when friends keep you out of the group?39:40: How do you tell your partner that you’re having an emotional affair?42:30: The family secrets parents should never reveal to their children.47:15: What about traumatic family secrets?50:00: Choose the person who is your “coping compass” wisely.54:30: Questions you can ask anyone to develop a closer relationship.59:50: Here’s my hardest memory and what I realize about it now.Want more resources? Go to my podcast page at melrobbins.com.Disclaimer

In this episode, you will meet Judie, a total badass who has it all figured out, from killer biceps to fulfilling friendships to staying mentally sharp, spunky, and sexy. She’s got it all together. Who is Judie? She’s my 85-year-old mother-in-law.  You don’t need a library full of books filled with the science of staying young forever. Today you are getting the cliff notes for living a long, happy, healthy, fulfilling, and purposeful life. She will teach you:The reason moments of joy are fleeting for you and how to make them last longer.The most important relationship you need to foster in your life.The surprising thing you can do this week to create purpose in your life.Why you need friends that are younger AND older than you.How to create a killer morning routine that fuels your busy life.The 3 ways to keep your mind young at any age.The reason YOU need to be the first one to pick up the phone.  Today Judie is sharing her 7 secrets to longevity and coaching you on how to get the life you deserve. She spills her no-BS secrets on how to take care of your mind, body, and relationships. Backed by research and 80 years of experience, her love of life and ability to embrace moments of joy and give back are what make her such an inspiration. I am so excited to introduce this wonderful person to you. I want you to take a page out of her playbook. You’re never too young or too old to start living life the way you want. And it is NEVER too late to be the badass you were meant to be. Xo, Mel In this episode:4:02: How to create a killer morning routine that fuels your busy life.8:18: One mantra that you need for purposeful intention.10:14: When Judie first started working out (it’s not too late).11:30: Judie’s #1 for feeling less depressed and isolated as you age.12:13: Why you need friends that are younger AND older than you.14:41: The surprising thing you can do this week to create purpose in your life.17:44: The reason YOU need to be the first one to pick up the phone.19:50: The 3 ways to keep your mind young at any age.22:10: How to maintain the motivation to move every day.32:03: The most important relationship you need to foster in your life.36:47: How you can really “stay young at heart”.40:24: How to get the life you deserve and live the way you want. Disclaimer

In today’s episode, the incredible Patrick McKeown, international bestselling author of ten books on breathing and founder and CEO of The Oxygen Advantage, a world-leading breathwork training program, breaks down all things breathing. This is not a lecture; it is a masterclass. His decades of research will blow you away, so let’s slow down and learn from the best in class. You need this, and I need this. Why? Because you and I have been breathing all wrong. Today Patrick is revealing the 5 ways breathing through your mouth hurts your health and leaves you feeling more anxious and stressed. You and I are getting coached by the world's leading expert on functional breathing for better health, more focus, less pain, better sleep, and, honestly, a better you. This is information that should be shouted from the rooftops. AND taught to parents, teachers, and health professionals everywhere. These steps are so simple, and yet they’re incredibly impactful on ALL parts of your life: your work, your ability to play and have fun, and your relationships. Best of all, this advice is ZERO-cost to you. You will learn: What happens when you breathe through your nose.How breathing through your mouth stresses you out.How breathing through your nose improves your memory and focus.What your breath has to do with back pain.How nose-breathing boosts your immune system.What sleep apnea in children has to do with special education needs.3 simple yet powerful exercises that will leave you breathing easier.Why the hell should you want to tape your mouth shut.The study that found shallow breathing can lead to anxiety.An exercise that will help you get more oxygen into your lungs.Why your exhalation is the most important part of relaxation.How breathing the right way can stop snoring.Why the way you breathe during the day impacts your sleep at night.  The science proves that the quality of your breath determines the quality of your life. So let’s dive in. Xo, Mel In this episode: 3:15: Why do we breathe, anyway? Seriously.4:50: HOW are we supposed to breathe?5:30: Ok, so what are we doing wrong when we breathe?6:45: So what’s so important about breathing in through your nose?7:55: Here’s what happens when your brain doesn’t get enough oxygen.8:30: The antiviral gas only produced when you breathe from your nose.10:00: How mouth breathing increased a child’s need for special education.12:45: This statistic about breathing and anxiety is still blowing my mind.16:00: 3 breathing exercises you’re not going to want to miss!24:00: The incredible results I had after trying these breathing exercises.25:20: Listen to what happens when I tape my mouth shut. 28:00: Breathing out through your mouth tells your brain this.30:00: The study that found your breath is linked to anxiety.31:15: How many times should you breathe in one minute?32:00: Patrick coaches me into a proper BIG breath.39:00: Why your exhalation is most important when it comes to reducing stress.43:00: Why you should keep your mouth closed when you exercise.45:00: What mouth breathing has to do with snoring.51:00: Can better breathing help with sleep apnea?  Disclaimer

In today’s episode, you are getting a relatable and hilarious guide to navigating major transitions like a pro. Join me in a real and raw conversation with my friends and colleagues, Amy and Lynne, as we unpack the major mistakes and 6 lessons learned from "horrible" college drop-off experiences (both our own and the ones we had with our kids) and the fear that comes with any major transition in your life.  Whether you’ve got kids or not, these 6 lessons apply to you. Everyone is going through some kind of transition right now: back to school, back to work, and dropping out of college. It’s a time of saying goodbye, of saying hello to new chapters, and of helping people move into new dorms and apartments and transition to new jobs or a new grade. That means it is the perfect time to learn the 6 lessons I learned (the hard way) about managing big life transitions without losing your sh*t. Listen and Learn: The RIGHT way to empower someone who is drowning in self-doubt.The #1 thing to say to help anyone move forward with confidence.The 4 words that will help you or your child commit to change.A science-backed "bridging" tool to help any child feeling nervous.The 2 most important qualities you have to let your child borrow from you.Why feeling scared and anxious before a big change is mentally healthy.  Xo, Mel In this episode:  2:30: Hear one mom’s mistake after dropping her child off at college. 4:30: And what this mom did differently for her second child.7:30 The drop-off experience that I wish I’d done differently.10:30: Say THIS to your kids to help them ride the wave of emotions.11:30: What you think you will feel is different from reality and that’s ok.14:30: The #1 tool you have to let your child borrow from you..18:10: Use this preschool trick from psychologists when you leave your kids.29:00: Remember this the next time you start to overthink.29:20: Recapping 4 major takeaways.31:00: A fighter pilot shares how to gain control of your emotions.33:00: I’ve used this trick often to help others adjust to change in their lives.35:00: Feeling sad or uncertain about change? Good; you’re normal.   Disclaimer

In this episode, you and I are dismantling one of the most crippling forms of self-doubt. "Imposter Syndrome" is when you think you’re not good enough and that everyone else is smarter, more successful, and has more to contribute than you do. Everyone feels it. It’s so common that the Harvard Business Review found that even 70% of the world’s top executives have struggled with it. My mission today is to convince you that Imposter Syndrome is actually a GOOD thing. And I’ll use an example from my own life to prove my case. Come backstage with me to a huge music festival, where my daughter Kendall, an aspiring singer-songwriter, comes face-to-face with the famous musicians who inspired her career. Cue the panic. Self-doubt almost made her bail on what turned out to be a life-changing weekend in her career.She turned it around (you’ll hear how) and, as a result, was invited impromptu to perform twice with Grammy-winning musicians!Listen and learn how to be more courageous and confident in those moments that really matter. I can’t wait for you to hear: The 4 words Kendall repeated that crushed self-doubt and got her on stage.The powerful mantra to say when you’re nervous walking into a room.How to use humor (and tuna sandwiches) to connect with anyone.Why being a "nobody" is the most amazing "somebody" you could be.  It’s time to hit delete on your self-doubt forever. This one is so good and so relatable that you’ll be yelling, Encore! Xo, Mel In this episode, you’ll learn:2:15: Harvard Business Review says imposter syndrome is #1 fear of executives.3:40: Kendall puts us at the scene of her own paralyzing episode of self-doubt.5:30: Imagine being surrounded by everyone you’ve admired your entire life.11:30: This is the message you need to hear if you’re deep in self-doubt.12:45: My own story of feeling like an imposter before I became a speaker.19:30: Here’s how to start shifting your mindset and boost your confidence.20:20: The piece of advice that will help you stand taller.21:40: The three-letter word you need to repeat when your insecurity creeps in22:30: Once you change your mindset, your actions fall into place.24:00: You have a gift to offer even the most experienced people in your field.25:00: The seven words Kendall dropped that I’m still thinking about.27:15: The #1 takeaway from this conversation about self-doubt.28:45: Own where you are, and here’s what we mean by that.31:00: What you’re thinking will happen probably won’t.33:00: Learn how to balance giving and receiving, and you'll crack the code.35:15: Are you waiting for validation? Listen to this.38:00: There’s a reason you’re here. Here’s how to start believing that41:00: Here’s why imposter syndrome is a GOOD thing.  Disclaimer

A few days ago, I was the witness to a very tragic accident, and the experience affected me very deeply. I reached out to a renowned trauma specialist, and the advice she gave me changed my life. In this episode, you will hear that incredible advice because she allowed me to record it.  Dr. MaryCatherine McDonald, PhD, a best-selling author and professor, reveals the 5 essential things you need to know about trauma so you can finally move forward with your life. Listen, and I will help you pick up the remote control for your brain and turn OFF the trauma loop. What’s the trauma loop? You may be in it and not know it: if you get triggered and have no idea why (and this expert says we almost never know why), have flashbacks playing in your head over and over again, the trauma loop is at play. With the help of our expert, Dr. MaryCatherine, you and I unpack (in real time) the accident I witnessed and how it affected me. With compassion and clarity, she explains what trauma really is and how to heal from it. You will learn and benefit from her decades of research and clinical experience. And she’ll help you understand what steps you need to take so that your brain does not store an experience as "trauma".  Dr. McDonald is one of the few experts who explains trauma and how to heal it in a way that is easy to understand, and her 5 truths will change the way you relate to yourself forever. The strategies and science in this episode will help you: Know what to do 4–24 hours after the traumatic event occurs.Understand the ‘trauma loop’ so you can identify when you are stuck and how to get out.Properly process traumatic events, even if they were deep in the past.Spot myths about trauma that even psychologists don’t understand.Know what narrative psychology is and why it’s proven to work.Uncover and heal from your flashbacks, looped thoughts, and triggers.Learn why you and your siblings have different memories of the same events.How to calm your nervous system and be present with your emotions.  This episode could change your life. And it is absolutely one you want to share with anyone who could benefit from Dr. MaryCatherine’s expertise. And I want to be upfront with you: yes, today’s episode is powerful, and it’s also a serious topic. If this isn’t the right time for you to listen, I understand completely. Just bookmark it so you can come back to it later. I’m not going anywhere.Xo, Mel  In this episode, you’ll learn: 01:44: The very scary moment that left me feeling traumatized.06:19: Full panic hit me at this exact moment.11:26: What narrative psychology is and why it’s proven to work.14:10: Understand the ‘trauma loop’ so you can identify when you are stuck. 17:41: How your brain processes a normal event or memory. 19:38: How your brain processes a traumatic event.23:08: Uncover why you have flashbacks, looped thoughts, and triggers.27:32: How EMDR can integrate traumatic memories properly. 30:29: Why do you and your siblings have different memories of the same events. 37:28: Why feeling shame around a trauma response is normal.41:52: Three ways to calm your nervous system and be present with your emotions. 44:26: The biggest myth about triggers that even psychologists get wrong.  Disclaimer

In this episode, you’re getting a crash course in 13 essential hacks that will help you be more successful, and they’re backed by surprising research out of Princeton. Vanessa Van Edwards is the founder of the behavior lab The Science of People, a behavioral investigator, body language expert, and bestselling author who specializes in the kind of science-based people skills most of us never hear about. Vanessa’s research proves that anyone can learn these practical skills, earn the trust of others around them, and become more confident, competent, and reliable. News flash: You don’t have to be an extrovert to be successful. Whether you want to be a better leader, land your dream job, achieve big goals, or align your life with what you want, this is the episode for you. Listen, and you'll learn: 3 things you must do in the first ten seconds of a Zoom call to appear trustworthy and reliableHow to nail any interview by building unstoppable confidenceWhy do you keep getting passed over for a promotion?The words you need to get the bonus or raise you deserveWhy a second impression is just as important as the firstHow a fake smile will ruin your reputationThe simple mistake we all make when asking for what we wantHow do you spot a liar?  This is an encore episode that is packed with tools, tips, and scripts to boost your chances of success. With new and exciting insights from me at the top of the episode, you will leave feeling more confident for your next interview, first date, or wherever you are upleveling in your life.  You owe it to yourself to learn how to cultivate unstoppable confidence and influence, and you can do that in just a few minutes.  Xo, Mel  In this episode, you’ll learn:2:23: The shocking research from Princeton about how people size you up.4:50: What exactly IS charisma and what does it look like?6:58: Why high achievers can’t just rely on their intelligence.8:15: Two types of awkward people and how to tell.14:14: Are you highly competent? Look for these three signs.16:42: What highly competent people are missing.21:27: What highly warm people are missing.23:58: The ONE thing you need to do in the first 10 seconds of your Zoom call.28:06: A simple test that will help you figure out how charismatic you are.32:10: The reason why you keep getting passed over for that promotion.40:08: Why you should never fake a smile. 46:02: Three ways you can start building your charisma today.47:42: Why a second impression is as important as the first.51:07: Five silent cues to command respect in any situation.  Disclaimer

In this episode, world-renowned brain specialist Dr. Daniel Amen reveals the secrets to a happier life, and it all starts with... (surprise!) your brain. Dr. Daniel Amen is a medical doctor with 40 years of experience as a psychiatrist, 12 New York Times bestselling books, and he’s conducted over 200,000 brain scans, all of which back up the simple, proven tactics he’s about to share with you. Dr. Amen shares the 3 most important habits you can start today to make your brain work better for you, based on decades of research.Whether you’re dealing with anxiety, addiction, or stress, the information in this episode will forever change the way you think about your brain. No boring and complicated science here. Learn simple, practical changes to improve your brain, like: What to say first thing in the morning to keep your brain strongThe 5 most important foods to eat for optimal brain healthThe 2 most important vitamins to take every dayHow to tell when your vital hormones are offWhy strength training is better than cardio for your health3 most important words to keep your brain sharpThe breathing technique Dr. Amen recommends for an anxious mind  This is your zero-cost guide to better brain health!  This is an encore episode with new and exciting insights from me at the top of the episode. You keep asking about how to improve your mental health, and it starts with improving your brain health. In under an hour, you’ll learn everything you need to be sharper, smarter, and more successful—by maximizing the power of your brain!  Xo, Mel In this episode, you’ll learn:0:52: Today, you have an appointment with one of the world’s leading experts on brain health.05:28: The craziest brain scan Dr. Amen has ever seen07:17: Brain health 101: What you need to know about your brain today09:34: The simplest habit you can incorporate today to protect your brain10:53: The first thing you need to say every morning to keep your brain strong13:01: The 2 most important vitamins to take daily16:38: What do having a glass of wine and falling in love have in common?20:52: 3 easy ways to know if you have low dopamine levels29:02: The breathing technique Dr. Amen recommends for an anxious mind33:02: 2 proven ways to calm a very busy brain37:40: Whenever you get a negative thought, ask yourself this one question39:04: If you feel tired all the time, it’s time to look inward.42:47: How to improve your memory: it starts in your kitchen46:10: The greatest piece of advice on brain health you need to leave with  Disclaimer

In this episode, you’ll get 5 effective strategies to help you improve your family dynamics, resolve almost any conflict like a pro, and create a better bond. Spending time with family is awesome, but it can also be challenging because, as much as you wish everyone could get along, different personalities and opinions don’t always mix well together. When family drama starts, don’t allow yourself to get sucked into it. You can learn how to dial down the drama and build trust and connection. Today I invite you to sit on the couch next to me and my family here in Vermont as our three adult kids discuss all the ways Chris and I have screwed up as parents and the things we did that built trust and brought us closer. I can’t wait for you to hear the truth bombs our kids are dropping. They’re shockingly insightful and will change your relationships for the better. Listen, and you’ll learn: The mistakes we (and other parents) made and how to fix them.How to set powerful boundaries that everyone knows and respects.The most tactical way to deal with difficult relatives and their BS.The 6 words that increase trust in any relationship.What to do when you repeat the same toxic relationship patterns.5 secret words that will get your kids (or anyone) to tell you the truth.One simple tool that makes discipline and boundaries easier for you .(and your kids)  Share this episode with your family, and consider listening to it WITH your kids. It’ll definitely spark an interesting conversation because we get real and raw, and hold nothing back. If you’re looking to get closer to someone you love, this episode is exactly where you should start. I can’t wait to hear what you think! Xo, Mel In this episode, you’ll learn: 02:40: My daughter recently schooled me in a conversation about boundaries. 10:40: Ladies and gentlemen… my family.13:25: A listener asks, “Are your kids really that open in real life?”16:05: What we said to our daughter that knocked down barriers between us.18:30: Here’s the #1 reason why kids don’t get honest with their parents.21:30: This is how Chris and I think about the purpose of parenting.26:00: Shouting out research around addiction so we can have compassion.30:10: Chris shares how he became addicted to recreational drugs..33:00: How do you start forming a good bond with your kids at an early age?35:00: Trust us; you’re going to screw up as a parent, and it’s okay.39:30: Expressing our emotions lets our kids know they can express theirs.41:30: Oakley shares how seeing his dad cry impacted his life.45:15: A listener asks: How do you get your teens to open up to you?48:30: How do you find peace in your mistakes with your kids?54:00: Your kid wants to leave school for a partner somewhere else: try this.58:00: The #1 question I ask my kids when they’re struggling.1:05:00: Know somebody in a relationship with somebody who is stifling them?  Disclaimer

In this episode, a renowned Oxford-trained neuroscientist teaches you the most incredibly simple, science-backed hack that will change every single part of your life in just 10 minutes. Professor Shane O’Mara, academic writer, author, and Experimental Brain Researcher at Trinity College in Dublin, walks us through the mind-blowing research behind, of all things, walking. You’ll be shocked to learn how the right kind of walking can lower depression and anxiety without medication. Professor O’Mara explains 3 different types of walking: one way will boost your creativity, another will make you more productive, and a third way will make you a rockstar problem solver. You’ll also learn about the incredible cognitive, mechanical, and physiological chain reaction that happens in your brain and body during a simple walk. The research and neuroscience will empower you to use walking to help you: Conquer your fears.Make your brain younger.Reduce your stress and feel happier.Double the number of your creative ideas.Be more focused and productive at work.Turn off anxious thoughts.Decrease inflammation in your body.Improve your relationship with yourself and others.  If you’re short on time, bullshit. Put your earbuds in and get outside. Are you ready? Hit play, and let’s walk. Xo, Mel In this episode, you’ll learn: 05:29: Want a younger brain? Start moving.  09:48: You won’t believe these benefits of a 10-minute walk. 11:29: Is your environment working against you? 16:28: Here’s how walking is just as good, if not better, than your antidepressant.17:20: This is what happens when you get outside and into nature.20:50: What the heck is a “walking mind”?23:54: Walking makes you more creative if you do this.31:34: Turn up your energy while you walk using this incredible metaphor.32:56: The shocking study that explains how walking changes your personality.36:07: Don’t have enough time for a walk? I call BS. Here’s why.39:00: Professor O’Mara suggests your walking routine should look like this.42:32: 5 easy ways to get in more steps every day.47:03: This is why you want to make it a habit to walk at night.52:06: Feel like you don’t belong? Here’s how walking can help.    Disclaimer

In this episode, double-board certified Dr. Amy Shah is here to explain the science of hormones, how they impact a woman's body, and more importantly, what you can do about it. If you’re tired of PMS, bloating, mood swings, hot flashes, the belly "bread basket," or the brain fog of menopause... grab your pen and get ready to take notes. Dr. Amy, a medical doctor trained at Harvard, Cornell, and Columbia, is an immunologist and leading expert in women’s hormonal health and nutrition. She is here to explain it all in a way that you can understand and apply to your life.   Today, Dr. Amy Shah reveals: What hormones are and how they work.What’s going on in a woman's body from first period to menopause.Why hormone therapy won’t help you lose weight.What 4 things you need to help you naturally boost estrogen.Why walking is better than HIIT or running if you’re in menopause.3 simple changes for a better night’s sleep.How sleeping in a pitch-dark room helps you lose weight.How to hack your 28-day cycle for more confidence and resilience.  I can’t wait for you to learn from Dr. Amy. You are going to feel so empowered! And please share this with all the women you care about in your life: your mothers, sisters, daughters, wives, and girlfriends, because we all deserve to know what the heck is going on and how to feel better in our bodies. Xo, Mel PS: For all of our readers who are men, do NOT stop reading. You have to live with us, so this will help you too. (And will make you wonderful when you forward it to all the women in your life). Plus this research and advice on hacking hormones is just downright fascinating! In this episode, you’ll learn:02:27: Why the hell do I always feel so tired? 04:52: What happens in our bodies during PMS and menopause?09:10: Best metaphor to help you understand what’s going on in your body.11:37: How to optimize your health in every phase of hormone change.15:02: When in your cycle you should train and eat like an athlete.17:03: What is really happening with your hormones during pregnancy?21:09: Where the heck did this muffin top come from?27:32: The top 5 health questions for Dr. Shah and her answers. 30:02: Did you know that PMS is a mini-menopause?34:06: Why sleeping in a cold, dark room will help you lose weight.38:42: Top 3 tricks that regulate your cravings.40:01: Why anxiety increases during PMS.46:48: What you need to know about hormone replacement therapy.56:12: Power nap or meditate at THIS time for best results.59:01: Why it’s way past time we start talking about women’s health.  Disclaimer

In this episode, renowned researcher, bestselling author, and total badass Ritu Bhasin will help you step into your power. Her work proves that a better life begins when you stop trying to fit in and start showing up as your authentic self. Does this sound like you? You say yes to fit in.You stay silent and let others talk over you during meetings.You never ask for that raise you’ve earned.You let your partner and friends make all the decisions.You don’t have big goals because you’re afraid to fail.  Before you waste another day of your life pretending to be someone you're not, listen to this life-changing episode.  You deserve better. This episode will teach you how to make the rules and be who you want to be. Ritu and I will teach you how to claim your confidence and live a bolder, badass life in 4 simple steps. Game ON.  This is your time. Take it. Xo, Mel In this episode, you’ll learn:  05:27: Why Ritu wanted to make an entire video about how to pronounce her name.09:08: What it means to stand in your power.12:53: Are you masking your true identity?18:32: Feeling comfortable with yourself vs. hiding who you really are…22:24: The pressure to perform shows up in the body in these ways…27:02: The #1 thing Ritu did to bring more belonging and authenticity into her life. 29:24: 3 steps to conquer uncomfortable situations.31:42: The mantra that Ritu repeats to herself to stay in control.37:11: The only thing you can control are your actions. 43:48: The most important version of your “self” looks like this..47:32: How to make others feel like they belong, too, and why that matters.49:52: You have 3 versions of your "self" - here’s what they are.52:54: We are all adults stuck in a middle school brain.58:38: The #1 takeaway I want you to get from this conversation.  Disclaimer