We Can Do Hard Things with Glennon Doyle

In the conversation that’s meant the most to Glennon, Abby, and Amanda – poet and spoken word artist, Andrea Gibson makes the bravest announcement we’ve ever heard. Andrea shares how to boundlessly, relentlessly love our lives by: paying attention to the only thing we can control; letting go of living in fear; and feeling less alone and terrified through it all. CW: Discussion of suicidal ideation About Andrea:  Andrea Gibson is one of the most celebrated and influential spoken word artists of our time. Best known for their live performances, Gibson has changed the landscape of what it means to attend a “poetry show”. Gibson’s poems center around LGBTQ issues, spirituality, feminism, mental health and the dismantling of oppressive social systems. Andrea is the author of seven books, most recently “You Better Be Lightning”.  TW: @andreagibson IG: @andreagibson To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In today’s beautiful, vulnerable, and funny conversation, Glennon, Abby, and Amanda reveal what each feels most insecure about. Plus, Amanda connects with a member of the Pod Squad on raising a kid with ADHD and her shift that changed everything; Glennon talks about anger as a guard dog and her discovery while rock climbing on “vacation”; and Abby explains why retirement from soccer was one of the hardest times of her life and how she navigated that massive life transition.  To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Sex therapist Vanessa Marin is back and we’re digging into: why we’re (sadly and ironically) proven to be less likely to try new things in the bedroom the longer we’ve been partnered; how to spice up your sex life when things get bland – including how to find out and explore your sexual fantasies; how not all orgasms (even for men!) are created equal; and the TikTok sex challenges we should probably pass on. For our previous conversations with Vanessa, check out: Episode 195 Sex Talk & That Night in Miami: Sex Therapy with Vanessa Marin and Episode 196 How Glennon & Abby Learned to Talk Dirty with Vanessa Marin. About Vanessa: Vanessa Marin is a sex therapist and instant New York Times Best Selling author of Sex Talks: The Five Conversations That Will Transform Your Love Life, co-written with her husband and partner-in-crime, Xander Marin. Vanessa is here to help you kick shame out of the bedroom so you can start feeling the connection, pleasure, and joy you deserve! Vanessa has been featured in various major publications and has written for The New York Times, Allure, and Lifehacker. TW: @VMTherapy IG: @vanessaandxander To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

For graduates (and all of us), it’s scary and hard to know the way forward. Listen to Abby tell the Class of 2023 (and all of us) the way!  Thank you to Loyola Marymount University.   To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Trauma therapist (and survivor of marriage to a narcissist) Caroline Strawson joins us to discuss: how to know if someone’s really a narcissist; how to know if you’re more likely to get into a relationship with a narcissist (and avoid it); strategies for parallel parenting with a narcissist; how the brain and body respond to narcissists; and how to rebuild after ending a relationship with a narcissist.  CW: Abusive relationships, self harm For more related episodes, check out: Episode 170 The Most Radical Way to Heal: Internal Family Systems with Dr. Becky Kennedy, Episode 169 Why We Love the Way We Love: Attachment Styles with Dr. Becky Kennedy, and Episode 142 Codependence: How to Stop Controlling Others with Melody Beattie About Caroline:  Caroline Strawson is a Trauma Therapist and Coach specializing in helping others heal from the trauma and shame of narcissistic abuse. She hosts the Narcissistic Abuse & Trauma Recovery Podcast and is the #1 best selling author of Divorce Became My Superpower. Having been married to a covert narcissist herself, Caroline was in debt, lost her family home, and was at rock bottom with PTSD, depression, anxiety, and self-harm. Caroline integrates Internal Family Systems, Somatic Experiencing, Brainspotting and breath work with positive psychology, to help others move from post traumatic stress to post traumatic growth. TW: @cstrawson11 IG: @carolinestrawson To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this unplanned conversation, Amanda speaks up for everyone who’s been labeled a “Control Freak” – anyone who feels like they have to hold up the entire sky for their families or businesses – when what they really want is to feel supported and safe. Amanda shares vulnerably about: how she became an overfunctioner, the blessings and curses of being one, and the practical strategies she’s using to let go – and what her partner is doing to make her feel like she can finally try to relax.   If this episode resonates, go back and listen to OVERWHELM: Is our exhaustion a sign that we’re CareTicking time bombs? To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

For the first time, Glennon requests a one-on-one with our guest – author and poet Maggie Smith – in this deeply honest conversation about: how to tell the brutal truth without betraying our people, how to reclaim ourselves after infidelity and betrayal, how the shaming of women who dare to tell their stories keeps us powerless and isolated, and how they both have embraced acceptance instead of “forgiveness.” About Maggie:  Maggie Smith is the award-winning author of You Could Make This Place Beautiful, Good Bones, The Well Speaks of Its Own Poison, Lamp of the Body, and the national bestsellers Goldenrod and Keep Moving: Notes on Loss, Creativity, and Change.  A 2011 recipient of a Creative Writing Fellowship from the National Endowment for the Arts, two Academy of American Poets Prizes, a Pushcart Prize, and fellowships from the Sustainable Arts Foundation and the Virginia Center for the Creative Arts. TW: @maggiesmithpoet IG: @maggiesmithpoet To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Glennon explains what she meant when she said, “I just can't find gender in me. I can only find it on me,” in this beautiful conversation that began with a question from a college freshman named Nick. Please revisit our conversations with ALOK here: Episode 74 ALOK: What makes us beautiful? What makes us free? and Episode 75 ALOK: How do we interrupt trauma? How do we heal? To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Today, Abby, Amanda, and Glennon learn new ways not to be assholes. In this follow up to Episode 191 Why Etiquette is B.S. & New Rules for Living, we share Pod Squad wisdom about ways we can all make the world a less annoying place.  Join us as we learn how to deepen our conversations with people by not saying the first thing we think of, spreading “tell me more” energy instead of “let me tell you about me” energy, and not asking “surface” questions that aren’t surface at all. Plus, we debate holding the door open for strangers, embracing bodily noises in public, and using “but” in apologies. To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Embodiment teacher, Dr. Hillary McBride, joins us to discuss: what embodiment and disembodiment are; dissociation as survival response, somatophobia, and how to get more comfortable with fear. She offers concrete practices to stop blaming our bodies, and help us become attuned to our body’s messages.   If you haven’t listened to Glennon’s latest episodes about her recovery journey and embodiment, check them out here: Episode 199 Why Glennon Says We Should All Be In Recovery and Episode 200 Don’t Tell Glennon to Love Her Body. CW: eating disorders About Dr. McBride: Dr. Hillary McBride is a Registered Psychologist, researcher, podcaster, author, and speaker, but she identifies most with being a mother. She has lived experience and clinical expertise in the areas of trauma, embodiment, eating disorders, and the intersection of spirituality and mental health. Her research has focused on women's relationships with their bodies across the lifespan, and her books include: Mothers, Daughters, and Body Image; Embodiment and Eating Disorders, and the bestseller The Wisdom of Your Body. Her next book – Practices for Embodied Living – will be released in 2024. Her CBC podcast Other People's Problems was listed in the New York Times and Wall Street Journal as essential listening.  TW: @hillarylmcbride IG: @hillaryliannamcbride To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Amanda’s epiphany on Alice’s school Picture Day about the destructive messages we’re inadvertently sending our kids; our forced pursuit of happiness in photos with our families; why family photo shoots bring out the worst in us; and why we should allow ourselves and our people to just look like we look.  Check out past episodes mentioned: Episode 196 How Glennon & Abby Learned to Talk Dirty with Vanessa Marin and Episode 125 WHY ARE THERE NO PICTURES OF US?!? To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Priyanka Chopra Jonas dives deep into: the night she fell for Nick at the Met Gala, walking her baby through their harrowing NICU journey, her strategy to make Malti Marie think she’s cool, and why accountability is good – if we know the right people to be accountable to.  About Priyanka:  Priyanka Chopra Jonas is a multi-faceted talent, New York Times Best Selling Author of UNFINISHED, and one of the most recognized people in the world. She is an actor and producer, with more than sixty international and Hollywood films to her credit. She stars in the new Amazon series Citadel and the new movie Love Again. The Padma Shri, one of India’s highest civilian honors, was conferred on her in 2016 and she was named one of the “Most Influential People” in the world by Time Magazine. She is a global UNICEF Goodwill Ambassador, and a Global Citizen ambassador, and is involved in efforts to protect children’s rights and to promote the education of girls around the world.  TW: @priyankachopra IG: @priyankachopra To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Michelle Zauner on how to begin healing our mother wounds, using her sensitivity to deepen her relationships and be a rockstar, why she’s obsessed with sheetcake and winnebagos, and why she is still “afraid of her mental health.”  About Michelle:  MICHELLE ZAUNER is best known as a singer and guitarist who creates dreamy, shoegaze-inspired indie pop under the name Japanese Breakfast. She has won acclaim from major music outlets around the world for releases like Psychopomp and Soft Sounds from Another Planet. Her most recent album, Jubilee, earned two GRAMMY nominations for Best New Artist and Best Alternative Music Album. Her first book, Crying in H Mart, is a New York Times Best Seller. She’s currently adapting the memoir for the screen for MGM’s Orion Pictures. TW: @jbrekkie IG: @jbrekkie To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What is gaslighting REALLY and what isn’t?  Plus, how to know if you’re in a relationship with a gaslighter, the three types of gaslighters, and how to break free from a gaslighter and reclaim yourself.  About Dr. Stern:  Robin Stern, Ph.D., is the co-founder and associate director for the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence and an associate research scientist at the Child Study Center at Yale. She is a licensed psychoanalyst with 30 years of experience treating individuals, couples, and families. She is the author of The Gaslight Effect Recovery Guide: Your Personal Journey Toward Healing from Emotional Abuse.  TW: @RobinSStern IG: @dr.robinstern To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Is the most relentless question of your day (other than what do you want for dinner?): WHAT SHOULD WE WATCH TONIGHT? Here to help. Everything we’re watching, listening to, and reading on today’s pod: Yellowjackets, Succession, Calendar Girls, 90 Day Fiancé, and so much more. Let’s start a Pod Squad list. What are you all watching / reading / listening to? P.S. Succession Spoiler Alert! Skip through from ~20:38-23:20 if you need to! To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Why Glennon respects “body positivity” – but it doesn’t work for her.  What if every single thing we’ve learned about who we are is wrong? What if we ARE our Bodies? What if instead of trying to love our bodies, we could experience being alive on this planet… as bodies?  If talk about eating disorders and mental illness helps: Listen today. If it triggers: Skip today. CW: eating disorders If you have an eating disorder, you may find the National Alliance for Eating Disorders a helpful resource: https://www.allianceforeatingdisorders.com/ To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Glennon shares what her recovery – leaving something you can’t live without – feels like: Almost impossible. She explains how she views recovery as an invitation to a great quest that improves life for every person who accepts it.  If you haven’t listened to Glennon’s latest episode about her recovery journey and embodiment, check it out here: Episode 194 Glennon Finds Her Healing Partner.  If talk about eating disorders and mental illness helps: Listen today. If it triggers: Skip today. CW: eating disorders If you have an eating disorder, you may find the National Alliance for Eating Disorders a helpful resource: https://www.allianceforeatingdisorders.com/ To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Julia Louis-Dreyfus joins us to dive deep into: going to therapy with her 87-year-old mom, how to love adult kids well, the metaphor that got her through breast cancer, and why we should all be excited about getting older.  About Julia:  Julia Louis-Dreyfus is one of Hollywood’s most influential, iconic actors and producers. She starred in and executive produced HBO’s hit series Veep, she was Elaine Benes in Seinfeld and Christine Campbell in The New Adventures of Old Christine. She has received 11 Emmys with 26 nominations; she broke records for the most Emmys won. She was recently honored with the White House’s National Medal of Arts, the highest award given to artists who advance the arts in the United States.   On April 11, she released her new podcast, “Wiser Than Me,” a 10-part series of candid, witty conversations with women over 70. And her fantastic new film You Hurt My Feelings is being released in May.   TW: @OfficialJLD IG: @officialjld To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

How to end a relationship lovingly, how to love an addict, and how to keep surprising yourself in midlife (buy the tap dancing shoes). Plus, why Cheryl decided to cut down her drinking.  For our past episodes with Cheryl, listen to Episode 118 Cheryl Strayed: Don’t Let Your Dreams Ruin Your Life and Episode 119 It’s Okay to Want What You Want: Cheryl Strayed as Dear Sugar. For the Amanda episode Cheryl mentioned, listen to Episode 177 How to Face Your Biggest Fears with Amanda Doyle. About Cheryl: Cheryl Strayed is the author of the #1 New York Times bestseller Wild: From Lost to Found on the Pacific Crest Trail, which has sold more than 4 million copies worldwide and was made into an Oscar-nominated film. Her bestselling collection of Dear Sugar columns, Tiny Beautiful Things, was adapted for a Hulu television show that will be released in April. In 2016, the book was adapted as a play that continues to be staged in theaters around the world. Strayed is also the author of the critically acclaimed novel, Torch, and the bestselling collection Brave Enough. She lives in Portland, Oregon. TW: @CherylStrayed IG: @cherylstrayed To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

1. How to finally discover what turns us on, how to discuss turn-offs – and how to create “sex menus” with our partners. 2. The real reason so many of us don’t feel like having sex.  3. How to ask for more sex – and how to turn it down without hurting your partner.  4. Orgasm – why it’s not the whole shebang – and what to do if we’ve been faking it.  5. Glennon and Abby engage in an exercise to practice talking dirty. (Glennon has not recovered.) For the first part of our conversation with Vanessa, check out Episode 195: Sex Talk & That Night in Miami: Sex Therapy with Vanessa Marin. And to hear our original “Silent Sex Queen” episode, go way back and check out: Episode 14: SILENT SEX QUEEN: Why aren’t we talking about sex more? About Vanessa:  Vanessa Marin is a sex therapist and instant New York Times Best Selling author of Sex Talks: The Five Conversations That Will Transform Your Love Life, co-written with her husband and partner-in-crime, Xander Marin. Vanessa is here to help you kick shame out of the bedroom so you can start feeling the connection, pleasure, and joy you deserve! Vanessa has been featured in various major publications and has written for The New York Times, Allure, and Lifehacker. TW: @VMTherapy IG: @vanessaandxander To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices