Digest

Comedian Nikki Glaser joins Alex Cooper on "Call Her Daddy" to discuss her career trajectory, from her early days in St. Louis to her rise in Hollywood, marked by high-profile roasts and hosting gigs. Glaser delves into her comedic style, linking her aggressive roasting to personal insecurities, and contrasts her public persona with her "Midwest nice" upbringing. The conversation explores her dating preferences, the realities of dating shows like "Love is Blind," and the significance of voice in attraction. A substantial portion of the discussion focuses on female sexuality, challenging taboos, the importance of foreplay, and the journey to understanding female pleasure and orgasm. Glaser also touches upon societal conditioning around sex, the use of toys, and the shame surrounding masturbation. As their careers evolved, both hosts acknowledge a shift from explicit sex talk to more broadly appealing content. They revisit early career quotes and discuss embracing one's sexuality, with Glaser expressing a desire to shed inhibitions. The conversation then turns to the pressures women face regarding appearance in show business, Glaser's use of cosmetic procedures, and the societal implications of facelifts as status symbols. They also explore relationship dynamics, including Glaser's "hot husband" fetish, her views on commitment, and the complexities of jealousy and trust. The episode concludes with reflections on female friendships, the challenges of navigating the comedy industry as a woman, the double standards in media, and the impact of online comment culture. Glaser also discusses her new special, "Good Girl," and her personal struggles with control and vulnerability.

Outlines

00:00:00

Career Highlights and Midwestern Roots

Alex Cooper welcomes Nikki Glaser, discussing her recent career successes like the Tom Brady roast and hosting the Golden Globes. Glaser shares her journey from St. Louis to comedy in LA and New York, her return to the Midwest during COVID-19, and the appeal of "Midwest nice" contrasted with her public persona.

00:04:05

Comedy, Self-Esteem, and Dating

Glaser explains her aggressive roasting style as a product of self-bullying and low self-esteem. The conversation shifts to dating preferences, focusing on "wholesome" Midwest men, and touches upon reality dating shows like "Love is Blind."

00:07:42

Exploring Female Sexuality and Taboos

The hosts reflect on their early careers' focus on sex, challenging dismissals of female comedians discussing such topics. Glaser shares her journey in overcoming shame around sex and masturbation, aiming to foster open conversations for other women.

00:10:17

Navigating Sex, Sobriety, and Pleasure

Glaser discusses her experience with sobriety and its impact on sexual comfort. The conversation highlights the common challenges women face in achieving orgasm, emphasizing the importance of foreplay, self-discovery, and communication.

00:15:03

Faking Orgasms, Toys, and Body Awareness

The hosts discuss the prevalence of women faking orgasms and the role of toys in enhancing female pleasure. They also touch upon masturbation, societal shame, and the delayed self-discovery many women experience regarding their bodies.

00:19:00

Evolving Career and Public Persona

Glaser and Cooper acknowledge a shift away from explicit sex talk as their careers progress, discussing the need to adapt content for broader audiences. They revisit early career quotes and explore the concept of embracing one's "whore flag" and bedroom freedom.

00:22:21

Provocative Humor and Self-Discovery

Glaser reveals using provocative phrases like "put it in the ass" for "rage bait" and discusses the empowering feeling of discovering her ability to squirt. She humorously describes her vagina as a "hastily packed suitcase," reclaiming insecurities through self-deprecating humor.

00:24:53

Beauty Standards, Aging, and Cosmetic Procedures

Glaser discusses future career interests in beauty and aging, the double standards women face in showbiz, and the pressure to maintain a youthful appearance. She shares her experiences with Botox and filler, and the realities of facelift recovery and its status symbol implications.

00:33:51

Insecurity, Control, and Relationship Dynamics

Glaser suggests men discouraging cosmetic procedures may be insecure. They discuss how partners' silence can stem from insecurity, and how insults about beauty choices are rooted in jealousy. The conversation touches on controlling partners and the downward spiral of dependence.

00:36:07

Long-Term Relationships and Evolving Views on Commitment

Glaser details her decade-long on-again, off-again relationship with Chris, exploring the urge for new experiences and the realization of compatibility. She discusses her evolving perspective on commitment, viewing it as a mature choice rather than settling.

00:43:53

The "Hot Husband" Fetish and Feminist Perspectives

Glaser explains her "hot husband" fetish, finding arousal in her partner being desired by others, framing it as a feminist stance. She traces its origin to her relationship with Chris and discusses the competitive nature behind this desire.

00:48:43

Open Dynamics, Jealousy, and Communication

Glaser clarifies her comfort with her partner's separate physical encounters, emphasizing clear communication and transparency. She admits to experiencing jealousy and discusses the importance of addressing it collaboratively, while acknowledging public judgment of her views.

00:52:43

Friendship Dynamics and Trust

The conversation explores how friends navigate jealousy and differing perspectives on security in relationships. It contrasts a friend's desire to eliminate attraction with the speaker's view of a partner as an "off-leash dog" who returns willingly.

00:55:24

Female Friendships and Group Dynamics

The speaker shares the origin and evolution of her close-knit group of nine female friends, highlighting the role of their group chat, "Angels Angels," in sharing confessions, advice, and humorous anecdotes.

01:00:21

Navigating Comedy as a Woman and Double Standards

Glaser reflects on her experiences as a woman in the male-dominated comedy industry, recognizing gender-based disadvantages. They discuss unfair criticism female comedians face, particularly regarding writers, and the broader double standards in entertainment.

01:08:00

Unrealistic Standards and Public Focus

The speakers discuss the exhausting and hypocritical standards imposed on women, contrasting it with the treatment of men. They criticize the public's misplaced focus on trivial celebrity matters over serious issues like the Epstein files.

01:10:43

The Impact of Comment Culture and Personal Insecurities

The speakers lament the destructive nature of online comment culture on art and consumption. Glaser discusses her new special, "Good Girl," its title's origin, and her personal struggles with control and vulnerability, particularly regarding orgasms.

01:15:04

Performing in Hometown and Career Evolution

Glaser reflects on the challenges of performing her special in her hometown, battling imposter syndrome, and the desire for validation. She discusses her ability to embody different personas, highlighting her range and the multifaceted nature of her career.

Keywords

Q&A

• What is Nikki Glaser's perspective on her comedic style and its connection to her self-esteem?

  Nikki Glaser believes her aggressive roasting style stems from her own low self-esteem. She explains that by intensely self-criticizing, she develops the ability to target vulnerabilities in others with humor, using comedy as an outlet for her own insecurities.

• How does Nikki Glaser describe the appeal of "Midwest men" in dating?

  Glaser is attracted to "Midwest men" who are often described as wholesome, slightly immature, and preppy. She suggests that dating preferences can be rooted in high school archetypes and that she finds these qualities appealing in a partner.

• What are Nikki Glaser's thoughts on the pressures women face regarding beauty standards in the entertainment industry?

  Glaser believes women face a no-win situation with beauty standards, constantly pressured to conform to shifting ideals. She argues that cosmetic procedures like facelifts have become status symbols of wealth, and that societal expectations create immense pressure to maintain a certain appearance.

• How does Nikki Glaser view commitment in relationships, and has her perspective changed?

  Glaser previously felt commitment was settling, but now sees it as a mature choice. While acknowledging statistically better partners might exist, she values finding someone compatible and building a life, viewing it as a significant win rather than a defeat.

• What is Nikki Glaser's stance on her partner having sexual experiences with others, and where does this stem from?

  Glaser is comfortable with her partner having purely physical encounters with others, a dynamic she calls the "hot husband" fetish. This stems from a competitive nature and a feminist belief that men's sexuality can be transactional, and she finds arousal in her partner being desired by others.

• How does Nikki Glaser differentiate between physical and emotional cheating in a relationship?

  Glaser considers emotional cheating, forming deep connections outside the relationship, to be far more hurtful than physical infidelity. She believes physical encounters can be transactional for men and doesn't necessarily diminish the primary relationship's value.

• What is Nikki Glaser's perspective on the normalization of cosmetic procedures like Botox?

  Glaser sees Botox as increasingly normalized, akin to dyeing hair in the past. She believes it's no longer shameful and that women shouldn't hide it, suggesting that societal acceptance is growing despite potential concerns about unnatural appearances.

• How does Nikki Glaser handle potential jealousy or insecurity within her relationship dynamics?

  Glaser addresses potential jealousy by emphasizing open communication and transparency. She believes that if her partner were to develop feelings for someone else, honesty is crucial, and she would want to know about it to address the situation collaboratively.

• How does jealousy manifest differently in friendships, and what are the underlying reasons?

  Jealousy in friendships can stem from perceived threats to the relationship, fear of abandonment, or insecurity. It might lead to possessiveness, comparison, or passive-aggressive behavior, impacting the friendship's health.

• What are the challenges women face in the comedy industry?

  Women in comedy often encounter gender bias, receive less recognition, and face harsher criticism. They may be scrutinized for their material, especially if it touches on sensitive topics like sexuality or personal experiences.

• How does imposter syndrome affect successful individuals?

  Imposter syndrome leads individuals to doubt their achievements and fear being exposed as incompetent, despite external validation. This can cause anxiety, self-sabotage, and hinder career growth.

• Why is comment culture considered destructive?

  Comment culture can negatively influence how people consume content, leading them to form opinions based on others' reactions rather than their own experience. It can stifle creativity and genuine engagement.

• What is the significance of the "Good Girl" title for the special?

  The title "Good Girl" relates to a specific genre of porn the comedian consumes, where praise is given after a woman achieves orgasm. This reflects her personal exploration of control and vulnerability.

Show Notes