Dr. Lindsay Gibson joins Forrest to explore emotional immaturity, the consequences of growing up with emotionally immature caregivers, and what we can do to change those patterns in adulthood. They discuss the key signs of emotional immaturity, including egocentrism, low empathy, and affective realism. Dr. Gibson then shares how having an emotionally immature parent affects children, often by leading to emotional disconnection and people-pleasing, and the consequences of these patterns in adult life. Topics include the problems with “just be more compassionate,” estrangement, balancing competing desires, and how to heal in adulthood by reconnecting with your feelings, letting go of old fantasies, and setting healthy boundaries.

About our Guest: Dr. Lindsay Gibson is a clinical psychologist and the author of the Emotional Immaturity series of books, including her bestseller Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents. 

You can watch this episode on YouTube.

Key Topics:

0:00 : Introduction

1:15 : How Dr. Gibson defines emotional immaturity

6:45 : Markers of emotional immaturity in parents

11:05 : Emotional intelligence in children, loneliness, and regulating parents

19:05 : The arc of recovery, responding to feelings with thoughts, and healthy guidance

31:00 : Repeating patterns in relationships

36:15 : Letting go of the healing fantasy, and when to take space

42:45 : Estrangement, compassion, boundary setting, and becoming more authentic

58:45 : When healthy change creates social pressure

1:01:55 : Common misconceptions about emotional immaturity

1:06:05 : Recap

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