Assuming responsibility for someone else’s professional development and happiness changes you. But is it for the worse or for the better? The feelings can be mixed until you’re able to build your identity and confidence back up. Somehow this self-discovery has to happen while you’re meeting deadlines and feeling pressure to commit to more. How will you ever fit time in for your own professional development? Should career growth really feel this overwhelming?

Jen Dary regularly coaches first-time managers on questions like, “Who are you now?” “Who do you want to be?” and “How can you stretch without taking on too much?” She shares advice for finding yourself again, dealing with disillusionment, and setting priorities and boundaries. Then, a former guest who’s one year into leading a major project tells us about her aha moments. Finally, Kelsey answers the question of whether or not she’s ready to try management again.

Guest expert: 

Jen Dary trains and develops managers through her coaching business, Plucky. She hosts the Be Plucky Podcast.

Resources:

• “When Changing Jobs Changes Your Identity,” by Sarah Wittman


• “Becoming the Boss,” by Linda Hill


• “How to Focus on What’s Important, Not Just What’s Urgent,” by Alice Boyes


• You, the Leader (HBR Women at Work Series), by Harvard Business Review


• “Perfect Is the Enemy,” by Women at Work

Sign up for the Women at Work newsletter.

Email us: womenatwork@hbr.org