Welcome to the table--watch out for flying bits of chewed carrot and shoes...

 John is still unwelcome at his home church, so he gives an update on his church-hopping travels. WHAT DO YOU DO when you have nothing to do at church??? 

Next: Luke has a great idea for how to make an impression at the church pitch-in. But only you would get the joke, Neighbor! Everyone else would just be confused...

...and that reminds us of our late friend, Hank McGill! 

Then: You have homework, Neighbor! You need to send us your best punchlines for Hank's infamous set-up...  It goes: "A guy called and asked if I wanted a subscription to Prevention Magazine, and I said: ___________________________"

LATER:  You know, lots of churches pay to bring in a comedian for a night of laughs, but having one as a member of your congregation isn't always delightful.   When you order the caviar for a fancy restaurant, it feels high-value and cool.  But if you just bring caviar to the average church pitch in, it's just going to land on the floor under the highchairs, with the green beans, while everyone eats the mac-and-cheese.

That analogy made sense while we were crafting it...

Send your comments (and your punchlines) to nextdoor@johnbranyan.com!