DiscoverCodependency Alchemy: The PodcastWhy fixing their mood doesn’t fix you
Why fixing their mood doesn’t fix you

Why fixing their mood doesn’t fix you

Update: 2025-10-15
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Do you ever feel like it’s your job to make your partner (or kids, or parents) feel better when they’re upset? In this episode of Codependency Alchemy, we explore the codependent pattern of taking responsibility for someone else’s emotions and how it leaves you feeling resentful, anxious, and disconnected from yourself. I share how to shift from fixing their discomfort to creating safety within yourself, and we practice a real-time shadow work and somatic inner child exercise to help you break the cycle.

This episode is for you if:

* You immediately spring into action when your partner seems grumpy.

* You believe making them feel better will give you peace or safety.

* You feel resentful after trying to “fix” their mood.

* You’re ready to learn tools that help you meet your discomfort instead of abandoning yourself.

The real invitation is to ask yourself: is your partner asking you to fix their mood? The belief that “if I make them better, I’ll feel safe” is an old survival strategy, and we can appreciate how it supported you at one point in time but it doesn’t actually work in your adult relationships. In fact, it often leaves you more anxious, frustrated, or resentful. The real alchemy happens when you take all the energy you’d spend on fixing them and pour it into caring for yourself.

🌟 Special Podcast Listener Offer: Join the Codependency Alchemy Membership today and get 40% off!→ Click here to claim your discount and join now!

💬 Get Community Support: Join our vibrant, supportive chat community and get real-time guidance on your healing journey. → Join the chat

Free Shadow Work & Inner Child Guide: Ready to deepen your healing with a step-by-step guide?→ Download my FREE guide

🎥 Watch 9+ Powerful Masterclasses: Access practical tools, guided exercises, and transformative teachings to help you heal codependency and build healthier relationships. → Exclusive Masterclass Library

✍🏾 From My Journal: Intimate insights and reflections directly from my personal healing journey.→ Read my latest journal entries

💎 Explore "The Gems": Browse curated free resources filled with practical wisdom and actionable insights designed to support your growth and healing. → Get your free resources here



This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit alyssaaazander.substack.com/subscribe
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Why fixing their mood doesn’t fix you

Why fixing their mood doesn’t fix you

Alyssa Zander