DiscoverThe Bad Girls Bible - Sex, Relationships, Dating, Love & Marriage Advice
The Bad Girls Bible - Sex, Relationships, Dating, Love & Marriage Advice

The Bad Girls Bible - Sex, Relationships, Dating, Love & Marriage Advice

Author: Sean Jameson

Subscribed: 16,226Played: 185,798


Each week on the Bad Girl's Bible podcast, your host Sean Jameson interviews experts and professionals and everyone in between to teach you the tips and techniques you can use to improve your sex life and relationship or marriage. You'll also learn powerful insights on how to improve your dating and love life.
48 Episodes
What if your past didn’t have to dictate your future? Esin Pinarli is a human behavior specialist offering psychotherapy to couples, using the Imago and Gottman methods in conjunction with emotional-focused therapy. She joins us to share her perspective on the deep-rooted beliefs behind our actions and reactions within the context of relationships. We touch on how trauma affects us all, and common actions that trigger a trauma response within relationships. Tune in to hear how the support of a therapist can help everyone to unpack the experiences behind their trauma, how the four attachment styles impact our relationships, and how the pandemic has changed the way in which we relate to one another. Esin also explains the role of our nervous system in creating connection and attachment, common reasons why couples become dissatisfied with their sex lives, and much more. Key Points From This Episode: •    An introduction to Esin Pinarli’s counseling practice. •    Unpacking the buzzword, ‘trauma’, and how it affects all of us. •    Common actions that trigger a trauma response. •    The role of negativity bias. •    Advice for those seeking to address their trauma. •    How a therapist can support people as they unpack the experiences behind their trauma. •    The four attachment styles and how they impact our relationships. •    What the collective trauma of the pandemic has done to the state of attachment. •    Differentiating between introversion and the avoidant personality type. •    How codependency fits into attachment styles. •    Your nervous system’s role in creating connection and attachment. •    Why couples become dissatisfied with their sex lives. •    What effective communication might look like. •    Cultivating ‘the space between’ where intimacy exists within relationships. •    Simple solutions for the process addiction that comes from porn usage. Quotes: “People always think they have to qualify for trauma. Everybody has had a certain level of embedded trauma.” — Esin Pinarli [0:02:41]   “We should always be doing the work. There are just so many things in our subconscious that we are not aware of.” — Esin Pinarli [0:10:33]   “A therapist is somebody who will help you to make sense of what’s inside of you, and to untangle and unprocess that trauma so that it doesn’t dictate your future.” — Esin Pinarli [0:11:37]   “If you don’t have enough rupture and repair, you always end up feeling disconnected from your partner.” — Esin Pinarli [0:42:15]   “Not only do we have a dance with our romantic partners, a cadence and a rhythm, but there’s a space between us that is where the intimacy is.” — Esin Pinarli [0:43:13] Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode: Esin Pinarli on Instagram — Esin Pinarli on LinkedIn — Eternal Wellness Counseling — Codependent No More — Bad Girls Bible Sex Tips Newsletter — Other Episodes You Might Enjoy: #31 How To Fix A Sexless Marriage & Reignite Fiery Passion with Laurie Watson #34 The Secret To Reaching Orgasm During Sex with Laurie Mintz, Ph.D. #29 Experience Squirting Orgasms with Female Orgasm Expert, Jason Julius
Today on the podcast we welcome Caitlin and Michael Doemner, authors of Sex Every Day, who are sharing with us some hands-on tips for enjoying sexual intimacy on a daily basis, regardless of busy schedules, kids and periods.   They talk about their three-step strategy for practicing frequent intimacy, including how you can communicate your sexual desires in a fun way and what you can do to ensure that both you and your partner are always satisfied. Before you think all of this is unattainable for you as a parent of young kids, hang on a minute! They have four kids of their own and advise you on overcoming the logistics of having regular sex with a house full of small children.   Key Points From This Episode   The interesting story of how Caitlin and Michael got together. Why sleeping naked is such a natural and effective way to restore intimacy in a relationship. How the menu metaphor can be used to communicate and express sexual needs. The importance of being open to both give and receive. What you can do to maintain intimacy with your partner throughout the day. A quick review of the five love languages and what they each entail. Why it is important for couples to prioritize a woman’s pleasure. What couples with kids can practically do to preserve their intimacy and privacy. Why a period should not be stopping you from giving and receiving uninterrupted pleasure. And much more!   Tweetables   “It's really hard to be angry with somebody when you're laying full body contact naked with them and in bed.” [0:04:49]   “The intimacy and the passion, it doesn’t have to be intercourse …there's a lot of different ways that we can please our partners.” [0:19:45]   Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode   Bad Girls Bible Newsletter — Sex Every Day: How to Prioritize Pleasure in your Marriage — The Five Love Languages on Amazon — Pussy: A Reclamation on Amazon — Sex Every Day Website — Sex Every Day on Facebook —
On the show today we welcome Dan and Dawn Williams, master-slave couple, kink enthusiasts podcast hosts and authors of the new book Living M/S! Our guests unpack their own experiences of discovering their submissive and dominant sides and how they found each other and each other's limits.   They explain some basics about the master-slave dynamic and how it fits into the broader world of BDSM and kink play. They explain the important role of trust and the things that are pivotal in making a relationship like theirs work. We talk a bit about the events, parties and activities which they enjoy and Dan and Dawn are so open and honest, explaining the erotic nature of their lives.   The conversation also covers, shame, abusive relationships and how sharing stories, using cards and watching porn can help certain couples.   Key Points From This Episode   Dan and Dawn's awakening to their dominant and submissive sides. A little bit about how their master-salve relationship works. Earning trust and taking responsibility for mistakes.  Contrasting Dawns and Dan's average day with other relationships. Parties, dungeons and the BDSM play that the couple enjoy. The parts of play that each of them engage with. Considering the erotic and non-erotic elements of play. Some of the issues of shame related to submission.  Comparing a sub-dom relationship with an abusive relationship. The helpful act of sharing naughty stories and porn.  And much more!   Tweetables   “In our case, it happens to be a male led relationship where I happen to be in charge. What that means is that I take responsibility for everything in the relationship.” [0:03:45]   “If something needs to be addressed, it’s addressed head on instead of sideways. It’s a very authentic relationship where we’ve decided, what do we want this relationship to be.” [0:11:05]   Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode   Bad Girls Bible Newsletter — Erotic Awakening Podcast — Dan and Dawn Email — Living MS — The Kink Starter —
Today on the Bad Girl's Bible we a joined by a very special listener named Jaime, who is here to tell us about how her and her husband turned their marriage around after some very tough times. Early into their new marriage, Jaime's husband started to experience some pretty serious health challenges and after his diagnosis and medical prescriptions became increasingly moody and difficult to be around.   This, in conjunction with Jaime's own health and anxiety issues, led to a very difficult time, emotionally and in the bedroom. It took a few drastic changes that happened around the time of a mortal scare for her husband to take the relationship back to a healthy place and into territory that Jaime never even dreamed of. Jaime takes us through their complete history, early dates and the proposal before getting into the troubled period.   She talks about how different things are now and the difference in connection she feels when they make love. For all this and much more, be sure to join us today!   Key Points From This Episode   Jaime's childhood, parents and the atmosphere at home. The first day that her and her future husband met. Proposal, the wedding and the early days of marriage. Jaime's husband's health problems and the first diagnosis. How the medication affected her husband's moods and their relationship. Jaime's own health problems that she was experiencing at the same time. The near death experience that turned her husband's life around. Changing their sex life around and the effect of the Blowjob Bible. How the challenges have strengthened their relationship. The times that Jaime considered giving it up. How Jaime's life has turned out differently to her expectations. The role of her faith in helping her through tough times. Advice from Jaime to listeners in similar situations. And much more! Tweetables   “That’s how he is now, he brushes off all the little things and doesn’t let him bother anymore.” —  Jaime [0:15:30]   “Sometimes it does take something life altering to make you decide that it’s time to change how you live your life and the way you treat other people.” — Jaime [0:16:58]
Today on The Bad Girls Bible Podcast we are joined by small-town girl, Jenny, who shares with us about growing up in a poor family with parents who did not always get along, moving around frequently and how she and her husband first met. Jenny talks about their secret relationship, moving in together, how he convinced her to get married after all and the challenges of raising their kids together. The unexpected death of a loved one caused a massive rift in their relationship, however, and her life started slowly spiraling out of control. Not being able to openly mourn her loss, Jenny went into a major depression during which she behaved in erratic ways that threatened her life and that brought even greater discord in her marriage. She tells of the regrets she has, how she has learned to cope with her loss and what she advises every listener to hold onto in such difficult circumstances. Don’t miss out on this very moving conversation! Key Points From This Episode: More about Jenny’s experience growing up in an unhappy family. How she met her husband and their first few months knowing each other. What is was like seeing each other in secret while being in relationships with other people. Their relationship when they moved in together and having to deal with their exes. The difficulty of feeling like she had to do everything herself. The challenge of raising their kids together and having different parenting styles. Why she never thought of getting married and how he arranged the entire wedding. Losing a girlfriend to pneumonia and not being able to mourn her openly. Dealing with her husband’s resentment and jealously after her girlfriend passed away. Becoming clinically depressed, isolating herself and turning to self-harm. The intense moment she realized that she needed help.  The up and downside of moving to a new place and being lonely a lot of the time. What happened when her husband finally left her. Getting her daughter back home and what it meant to her. How practicing mindfulness and breathing techniques helps her to deal with her emotions. Dealing with the disappointment of her life not turning out how she expected it to. And much more! Tweetables: “I went into a major depression; a clinical depression, anxiety, and I was just locking myself away. I didn’t want to get out of bed. I didn’t want to go to work.” — Jenny [0:17:05] “He just stopped caring and he said he just started picturing me dead already and that he had thought of what he was going to say at the funeral and stuff. He just kind of wrote me off already.” — Jenny [0:18:55]
On the show today we’re talking to someone who has suffered immense emotional trauma but who has come out the other side stronger, wiser and ready to love again. Our guest really inspires those who have been through divorce, a partner’s infidelity, miscarriage or have been dealt an unfair hand, sharing openly about her two failed marriages, suffering multiple miscarriages and discovering her husband’s affair while pregnant in their first year of marriage. To add to our guest’s array of disappointments, she poignantly tells us about the letter that ended her second marriage and which left her devastated and alone. Having a partner abandon her after what she believed to have been twelve wonderful years, she had to work through the difficult circumstances all on her own, including managing the business they owned together, while he effectively disappeared for weeks. She talks about struggling with feelings of guilt and not being enough, and how therapy and support from friends and family restored her hope of finding love again. For more about how this woman conquered the many obstacles in her life, don’t miss out on this episode of the Bad Girls Bible Podcast! Key Points From This Episode: More about Susan’s background and being adopted into a wonderful family. How she met her second husband and their early days together. The age gap and her thought processes around it.  Falling pregnant a second time and having a series of miscarriages following the first. Why it is so difficult for Australian citizens to adopt. Her unfulfilling first marriage and their lack of intimacy. Her gut feeling about her second husband’s infidelity. How her partner’s infidelity consumed her and realizing that she needed to forgive. The devastating letter that ended their marriage. Being concerned for her husband’s mental state and worrying that he might end his own life.  The hardest thing about his abandonment and how it impacted her daughter. Struggling with feelings of inadequacy and feeling partly responsible for his decision to leave. Having to deal with her pain, their business and sharing the news with others by herself.  Getting to a place where she is ready to pursue love again. The importance of not being reactive is such circumstances. And much more! Tweetables: “I thought, hang on a minute, I’m pregnant, we’re in our first year of marriage and you are cheating on me? I was really devastated.” — Susan [0:15:56] “I felt like he was my soul mate, that’s why it was just so soul-destroying when he left me in the manner that he left me.” —  Susan [0:24:01] “I’m a hopeless romantic, I believe in love still, so, I’m willing to put myself out there.” —  Susan [0:31:40]
#42 Hysterical Bonding

#42 Hysterical Bonding


On today’s show we welcome Lee, who is here to tell us her personal story and how her husband cheating on her boosted her libido due to a phenomenon called hysterical bonding.  Hysterical bonding is a term which hasn't been studied extensively yet. However, it's a phenomenon that many people can relate to. It describes what happens when someone is cheated on by their partner, or is broken up with, and they want to do anything to win back their ex's affections. It sounds counter-intuitive and paradoxical, but that's because there are many different emotions at play. We’re discussing her marriage of 24 years, how she found out that her husband had been cheating on her and what led her to sticking around and wanting to rebuild the relationship. To hear more about Lee’s story, stay tuned! Key Points From This Episode: Hear more about Lee’s background. Growing up with an alcoholic, verbal abusive father. How Lee met her husband and got married 11 months into the relationship. The first signs that something wasn’t right. How Lee’s car accident and neck injury led to her being dependent on pain medication. The effect of the pain medication on Lee’s libido. Why guys who are getting fulfilled still go out looking for more. Having found the love of your life but also wanting sex or a relationship outside of that. Finding out about the other women. When the hysterical bonding kicked in. How Lee regained her libido and has been having sex 2/3 times a day since. Trying to rebuild the relationship, starting in the bedroom. Lee’s advice to listeners going through a similar situation with their partner. And so much more! Tweetables: “Our first several years of marriage were, I mean, I wouldn’t say perfect because I don’t think there’s a thing as perfect but I was very happy and I felt like he was too.” — Lee [0:09:51] “I was keeping him satisfied, the problem was, you know, I think he was not happy with the fact that he wasn’t able to satisfy me.” — Lee [0:15:37] “How can I be just totally heartbroken, devastated and at the same time want my husband?” — Lee [0:29:55]
On the show today we welcome Geanni, who is here to tell us all about her personal story and how she found out that her husband had got another woman pregnant while they were still married. This sort of situation is understandably distressing, but Geannie has a great perspective on it and offers amazing advice and insight that she has learned along the way. She gives us some of the backstory of how her and her husband got together and the marriage before explaining the period in which the infidelity came to light. She talks about her commitment to the marriage and how they actually managed to get over the issue for a period before the relationship ended. She also goes into her feelings on their relationship currently, how they share a child and the parenting process for her. For all of this and a fascinating interview from Geannie, be sure to tune in! Key Points From This Episode Some personal background on Geannie. Meeting her husband in high school and getting to know him.  The proposal and getting married soon after school. Confronting her husband about her suspicions.  Reconciling after the initial separation and the role of Geannie’s spirituality in this. Geannie’s husband’s fears of pregnancy with the other women. The decision to try and overcome this massive hurdle and the difficult first year.  Geannie’s current relationship with her husband and the family they have. Advice from Geannie to listeners in a similar situation. Geannie’s contact with her husband’s child and the mother.  And much more! Tweetables “We started dating early in 2006 and that was my senior year in high school. It was his junior year in high school. We were married in October of 2007.” — Geannie [0:03:32] “I just kept digging until I found something and so when I accused him, when I finally went to him, he denied it.” — Geannie [0:08:30] Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode Bad Girls Bible —
Welcome back to another episode of The Bad Girls Bible Podcast. Today on the show, we are joined by Alaina Schwartz to talk about her marriage of 17 and a half years and her subsequent divorce. Alaina grew up on long island in New York in a family of staunch disciplinarians that was incredibly emotionally dysfunctional, emotionally violent and sometimes even physically so. After high school, Alaina moved away to New York where she went to law school, and eventually was a lawyer in the music industry for almost 18 years. Today she is a successful transformational mindset and business coach, who teaches her clients the same mindset tools that radically changed her life. In this episode we talk about everything from how her husband was incredibly romantic at first, how she started to realize something wasn’t quite right in her relationship, how she earned more than him, and also how she stayed positive since divorcing him. So for an incredibly honest, and insightful conversation, be sure to tune in to today’s episode. Key Points From This Episode Alaina’s background story and her early life. The day the Alaina met her ex husband: love at second sight. Timeline and story of how Alaina’s ex husband proposed. Alaina’s fairytale wedding in Central Park. The first couple of years of their marriage. The incident that led up to their marital problems. Alaina’s heartbreak and challenges with her in-laws. The lowest point Alaina experienced in her marriage. When Alaina finally decided to move on with her life. Facing the allegations of being called an “unfit mother”. How Alaina’s life has turned out differently than what she expected. Why Alaina has no regrets from her past. Advice for listeners who are going through a divorce: mindset shift. Tweetables “I was determined to try to make it work every day I was there and every day I was rejected by him.” — @alaina_s7 [0:25:25] “There was no doubt that I thought we were going to be together forever that we would figure out a way to make that work.” — @alaina_s7 [0:26:26] “There can be multiple people that are really good for us in our lives at different times in our lives, depending on how we grow.” — @alaina_s7 [0:26:46] Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode Alaina Schwartz —  Alaina on Twitter —
On today’s show we welcome Dr. Lori Brotto, a Professor in the department for Obstetrics and Gynecology at the University of British Columbia and the Canada Research Chair in Women’s Sexual Health.   Lori has also the author of the book, Better Sex Through Mindfulness: How Women Can Cultivate Desire. In this episode we are discussing sexual desire, and how a low desire or lack of interest in sex is by far the most common sexual concern, not only in women but in men as well. Many people struggle for different reasons, both psychologically and socially. Lori helps us today to uncover those struggles and those reasons and step beyond our negative beliefs to reignite our sexual desires through mindfulness. For an incredibly insightful conversation, be sure to tune in to today’s episode!   Key Points From This Episode:   Hear more about Lori and how she became a sex researcher and sex therapist. Researcher’s findings on reasons why women experience low sexual desire. Why low sexual desire is often confused. Understanding how mood and depression suppresses desire. How your beliefs can impact your desire. Cognitive behavioral therapy and how it can effectively treat sexual complaints. Physical conditions people can have that may interfere with sexual function. A female Viagra solution to fix female sexual arousal disorder, how terrible can it be? Struggling to reach orgasm during sex: whether you’re lacking desire or full of it. How mindfulness can help women and man be more present and reignite desire. Lori share some stories from her book on how mindfulness can be useful. Adopting a regular mindfulness practice and engaging the muscle of the mind. And so much more!   Tweetables:   “Low desire or lack of interest in sex is by far the most common sexual concern, not only in women but in men as well.” — @DrLoriBrotto [0:04:01]   “Negative beliefs in the brain can also stimulate certain brain path ways that interfere with desire and arousal.” — @DrLoriBrotto [0:11:21]   “Pretty much anything that impacts hormones has the potential to impact sexual response.” — @DrLoriBrotto [0:14:35]   “If you are going to have sex, you may as well show up for it.” — @DrLoriBrotto [0:27:30]   Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:   Dr. Lori Brotto — Dr. Lori on Twitter — Better Sex Through Mindfulness: How Women Can Cultivate Desire — University of British Columbia —
On today’s show we welcome Annabelle Knight. Annabelle is a dating, sex and relationship expert along with being a certified couple’s councilor. She’s also written a novel, The Endless Autumn, which has been featured by Cosmopolitan.   Annabelle has her own range of sex toys available online and is a resident sex and love expert for online retailer, Our topic for today is sex toys. Thanks to Annabelle’s expertise on the subject she is able to share with us just how useful they can be and how they can cause breathtaking pleasure.   We’re also talking about getting your partner on board with using sex toys during sex and the different types of vibrators and sex toys available. For an incredibly insightful conversation, be sure to tune in to today’s episode!   Key Points From This Episode:   Hear more about Annabelle’s background and how she started her own line of sex toys. How sex toys can improve your pleasure, whether you’re alone or with a partner. Annabelle’s favorite sex toys - the cock ring and the vibrating bullet. Advice to people wanting to buy their first sex toy. Why some guys are hesitant about using sex toys during sex. Ways to help your partner get on board with using sex toys. Why using sex toys has nothing to do with how good you are in bed. Different types of vibrators for clitoral stimulation. What to look for when buying a sex toy. Sex toys that are unisex or male specific that men can use. Learn more about prostate play and prostate massagers. Toys to use during sex that can give different sensations. Anal first-timers prep. Main types of lubricant: water based, silicon based and oil based. Using the right type of lube with your sex toys. What to do if sex toys just aren’t for you. And so much more!           Tweetables:   “Sex toys are like the cherry on the cake so you don’t need the cherry to make the cake tasty but it kind of gives you a third dimension, a little extra something.” — @missbelleknight [0:03:10]   “Sex toys provide different type of stimulation and that’s not a better type or worse type, it’s just a different type.” — @missbelleknight [0:07:50]   “The end goal for any sex toy manufacturer is pleasure and the better their toys and their products provide pleasure, the more popular they are.” — @missbelleknight [0:18:26]   Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:   Annabelle Knight — Annabelle on Twitter — Annabelle on Instagram — The Endless Autumn — Love Honey — Cosmopolitan — Aneros —
Joining us today is Dee Dussault, a sexuality coach, Yoga Alliance® certified yoga teacher, the creator of Ganja Yoga, and author of the book by that title. She has taught partner yoga, vanilla tantra, and cannabis-enhanced yoga to thousands of people across the US, Canada, and Europe.   She studied sexuality for over a decade and carries an honors degree in Sexuality Studies. Her training was in the tantric tradition of Swami Satyananda of Bihar, India. Dee tells us what got her into tantra and explains that the practice is about much more than sex. She highlights the spiritual value as well as the opportunities it offers to fuel the evolution of our consciousness.   She further discusses mindfulness, the importance of slowing down your sexual encounters, and why the edge of your comfort zone is where you want to be. We talk about solo orgasmic experiences, Kegel exercises and the exhilarating dynamic that marijuana can bring to your yoga routine. So tune in to find out how Dee can help you tap into your radiant embodied self!   Key Points From This Episode:   Some of Dee’s background and how she became a sexuality coach. How tantra facilitates the whole human experience. Why tantra is for everyone, at any time.    The relationship between breathing and feeling. What to do when you feel awkward at first. How yoga can lead to arousal and orgasmic experience. The benefits of redirecting genital energy. How energy orgasms can be achieved. How tantric sex helps older people and those with sexual dysfunction. The importance of balancing Kegel exercises with stretches. How cannabis enhances your yoga routine. And so much more!   Tweetables:   “The idea is in Tantra that our sexual energy is the most potent energy we have as humans.” — @TheGanjaYoga [0:04:05]   “Tantra allows the whole range of human emotions and experiences.” — @TheGanjaYoga [0:08:00]   “You don’t need a partner to do tantra.” — @TheGanjaYoga [0:08:22]    “As you slow down your breath, your capacity to feel increases.” — @TheGanjaYoga [0:09:37]   “I recommend people play at the edge of their comfort zone.” — @TheGanjaYoga [0:11:09]   “Pleasure is our birthright.” — @TheGanjaYoga [0:22:51]   Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:   Yoga Alliance® — Swami Satyananda — Dee Dussault — Ganja Yoga — Ganja Yoga on Instagram — Sting — Sting on Twitter —
Today on the podcast we are joined by Danielle Harel, Ph.D and Celeste Hirschman. They are the cofounders of the Somatica Institute of Sex and Relationship Coaching. Danielle Harel received her Ph.D. and Doctorate degree in Human Sexuality from The Institute for the Advanced Study of Human Sexuality in San Francisco. She has a graduate degree in Clinical Social Work and a Bachelor’s degree in Psychology and Educational Counseling. Celeste Hirschman received her Master’s Degree in Human Sexuality Studies from San Francisco State University and her Bachelor’s Degree in Women’s Studies at the University of California at Santa Cruz. In their teaching, Danielle and Celeste connect with unconditional love, erotic energy, and presence to help their students and clients deepen their insight on self-awareness. They’ve also coauthored the books Making Love Real and Cockfidence, and this episode they share more about the importance of vulnerability and empathy in relationships, and how to be more mindful in your sex life. We also dive into ways to work through shame and fully embrace your sexual desires and fantasies without feeling judged. For an incredibly insightful conversation, be sure to tune in to today’s episode! Key Points From This Episode The story of how Danielle and Celeste met, and founded the Somatic Institute. Somatica: an experiential approach to sexuality and relationships. Importance of vulnerability for having a good sex life. Most common reasons why we often struggle to be vulnerable with our partners. How mindfulness plays a role in having better sex. Advice for couples who want to develop mindfulness. Learning to have embodied empathy when it comes to your relationship. Understanding how to process shame and embrace your sexuality. Key elements of a healthy relationship: attachment and individuation. Tweetables “The more that we can be vulnerable about our deepest desires and longings, the more that we can give each other the most hot, fulfilling sex.” — Celeste Hirschman [0:08:32] Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode Danielle Harel — Celeste Hirschman — Website — Somatica Institute of Sex and Relationship Coaching — Making Love Real — Cockfidence —
On the show today we are joined by Dr. Adam Mathews. Dr. Mathews is a licensed marriage and family therapist with over 15 years of experience working with couples and families. He’s an adjunct professor for both North Central University and Piper University and he’s also the cohost of the popular podcast, Foreplay Radio Sex Therapy. Currently, Dr. Mathews also serves as president of the North Carolina Association of Marriage and Family Therapists. In this episode we’ll be discussing the five sex conversations every couple needs to have to improve their sex life and address the regular problems that persist in relationships when sex is MIA or when your partner isn’t comfortable talking about it. Who better to talk on the subject of sex in relationships than the expert, Dr. Mathews! Highlights How Dr. Mathews came to be a therapist and started Foreplay Read Sex Therapy. Why some couples intentionally avoid difficult conversations about sex. Why when conflict grows: disconnection grows and your sex life follows suit. The first initial steps, what leads people to therapy and how to uncover the problem. What emotional and sexual disconnection does to your relationship. The right approach when you want to initiate the ‘sex’ conversation. Owning your part in it and focusing on one thing at a time. Laying off the pressure when making new requests. The “My parents did what?” conversation: what your family was like about sex. The “I’ll have what she’s having” conversation: getting away from assumptions. The “Indianapolis 500” conversation: what puts us in the mood for sex. The “I have a headache” conversation: How to deal with rejection, when you’re not in the mood. How to politely honestly and politely say, “Hey just not tonight”. The “The professor plum in the bedroom with the lights off” conversation. Not underestimating the soft skills: communication and how it can bring connection. And so much more! Tweetables “Just never force a sex conversation on somebody if they don’t want to have it.” — @MathewsCounsel [0:13:17.1] “Sex is the ultimate expression of love and connection.” — @MathewsCounsel [0:16:38.1] “You mention the soft skills and I think that is what they are and I would just say, don’t underestimate the power of this stuff.” — @MathewsCounsel [0:35:33.1] Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode Dr. Adam Mathews — Dr. Mathews on Twitter — Dr. Mathews on LinkedIn — Dr. Mathews on Facebook — Foreplay Read Sex Therapy —
Today on the show I am talking to Dr. Laurie Mintz. She is a professor, author, speaker, and therapist. She teaches psychology of human sexuality to hundreds of undergraduate students annually and she has also authored two books, Becoming Cliterate: Why Orgasm Equality Matters — And How to Get It, along with A Tired Woman’s Guide to Passionate Sex. Inside this episode, Laurie shares her findings on the orgasm gap that exists in relationships and why that often starts at the beginning of a sex ed program. We also dive into the importance of self-discovery and understanding what works best for you as an individual, and then communicating that to your partner. Finally, we bust some of society’s myths about sex and Laurie shares her take-home advice that women can implement in their sexual journeys today. So if you want to learn all of Laurie’s incredible secrets to experience orgasms during sex, don’t miss out on today’s episode! Highlights Laurie’s background and how she came to teach psychology of human sexuality. How the orgasm gap inspired Laurie to write Becoming Cliterate. Understanding why there is so much ignorance about female sexual pleasure. The effective strategy of sex education in the Netherlands. First steps a woman can take to increase her “cliteracy”. How to incorporate yourself; a journey of self-discovery. Why sexual communication can really go a long way. Getting rid of the myth that sex should be spontaneous. Approaching your partner about introducing new ideas into your sex life. Advice for women struggling to orgasm or struggling with low sexual desire. Tweetables “It’s truly, truly impossible to have an orgasm while you are worrying about something.” — @DrLaurieMintz [0:17:19] “Mindfulness is putting your mind and body in the same place.” — @DrLaurieMintz [0:17:19] “Communication is the bedrock to make your bed rock.” — @DrLaurieMintz [0:26:17] Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode Dr. Laurie Mintz — Laurie on Twitter — Becoming Cliterate — A Tired Woman’s Guide to Passionate Sex — OMGYes — Calm — Head Space —
Today we are doing something a little different, which I think you will find pretty interesting…Instead of our regular guest, I am talking to a listener of the Bad Girls Bible Podcast to bring you a whole new perspective to all things relationships, and real world experiences. So in this episode we welcome listener, Paige, to talk about her relationships and the struggles she’s faced, including dealing with her difficult mother-in-law and even finding out her husband had been texting his ex! Paige then goes on to talk about how she came through these relationship struggles to be in a better, happier place. Whether you’re in a relationship or not, there is a lot to learn from our conversation and hopefully some inspiration too, especially if you’re facing your own relationships struggles. If you’d like to tell your relationship story on the podcast, shoot me an email to Highlights Hear more about who Paige is and how she met her husband. Getting proposed to after only 6 months of dating. What life was like for Paige between the proposal and the marriage. Dealing with the mother in law. Issues of jealousy early on in her marriage. Being a new mother and dealing with the frustrations that come with it. How Paige found out that her husband was talking to one of his exes. Getting on with depression - another baby and 5 years later. Going back to school and doing something for yourself. Finding your own happiness - having a positive mindset. How her marriage changed once she changed her mindset. The importance of developing your mindset. And much more!   Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode Bad Girls Bible — Bad Girls Bible Facebook Page —
On the show today we are joined by Vanessa Marin, who is a sex therapist specializing in helping women achieve orgasms. Through her work, in person and online, Vanessa has coached countless clients towards more fulfilling sex and a greater understanding of their bodies. In our conversation we cover Vanessa’s early desire to become a sex coach and the challenges that she faced on her journey towards her current status. We then get into the nitty gritty of the big ‘O’, unpacking different types of desire, the dual control model, common myths on the subject and the helpful concept of curiosity. We also discuss sex toys, menopause, and some of the methods and resources that Vanessa offers. Highlights How Vanessa found herself in the job of orgasm coach. The basis of Vanessa’s program for helping her clients. The strong bond between desire and orgasm. Differences between spontaneous and responsive desire. An explanation of the dual control model. Female orgasms are complex, how can we simplify it? Where to start focussing your efforts when learning how to orgasm. A few of the myths around female orgasm. The courses, steps and guides that Vanessa offers on her website Rethinking orgasm through the idea of curiosity. The use of sex toys in this endeavour. Menopause and orgasm and comparing different perspectives. A more realistic idea of a healthy sex life for couples. And much more! Tweetables “I always knew that female orgasm would be a hot topic in this area but I was definitely surprised by how many women were really desperately seeking some sort of solution.” — @VMTherapy [0:03:38.7] “There’s a really powerful relationship between desire and orgasm and I think that a lot of women tend to neglect that relationship.” — @VMTherapy [0:07:50.3] “I think it’s equally as important to think about what are the things that get in the way of me feeling desire.” — @VMTherapy [0:13:28.8] Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode Vanessa Marin — Brown University — New York Times — Oprah — Real Simple — Finishing School — Emily Nagoski  — Come As You Are —
On today’s show we welcome Laurie Watson. Laurie is a Certified Sex Therapist and Licensed Couple’s Counselor and author of Wanting Sex Again: How to Rediscover Desire and Heal a Sexless Marriage. She is also the co-host of a podcast along with Dr. Adam Matthews called Foreplay: Radio Sex Therapy for Couples, designed to help couples keep it hot. In clinical therapy, she has helped thousands of couples recover sexual passion and make love again in joyful, intimate, creative and exciting ways, sometimes even after years of sexless marriage. Inside this episode we dive into the topic of people wanting to reignite their passion and the desire that’s lost in a marriages or relationships. Laurie shares some incredible strategies to help you get back that fiery passion, today. We also diving into Laurie’s 444 Solution and getting your SEX confidence back! Show Highlights Laurie’s background and how she came to writing Wanting Sex Again. How a good marriage becomes a sexless marriage. The power struggle between the pursuer and the “distancer” in the relationship. Examples of a pursuer and a distant person. Understanding the concept of Attachment theory. Detailed talkers versus bullet point talkers. Importance of secure attachment. Doing a self analysis to understand where you are at personally (and your relationship). Laurie’s 444 Solution and how to use it in your relationship. What birth control can do to a woman’s libido. The Madonna Whore Syndrome. Common issues affecting couples in their sex lives. Getting your self confidence and body confidence back. And so much more! Tweetables “Within two years of marriage, one third of all couples are sexless.” — @asklauriewatson [0:03:31.1] “If there’s no big bang, there’s no big deal.” — @asklauriewatson [0:09:12.1] “We need a talking avenue and we need a physical touching avenue to really have secure attachment.” — @asklauriewatson [0:15:53.1] Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode Laurie Watson — Laurie’s Website — Laurie on Twitter — Laurie on Facebook — Laurie on Instagram — Laurie on LinkedIn — Wanting Sex Again: How to Rediscover Desire and Heal a Sexless Marriage — FOREPLAY: Radio Sex Therapy for Couples — Awakenings Center — Love and Sex Quiz — Make Love Not Porn —
Today on the podcast we are joined by a very special guest, none other than Alice Little from the Bunny Ranch and the Wing Woman Podcast. Alice is one of the most prominent sex workers in America and she is here to give our listeners expert advice and all round insider scoop on great sex and easy tips for increased pleasure and intimacy. In our discussion we cover Alice’s personal history and thoughts on sex work and perceptions around the subject. From there we cover dirty talk, orgasms, oral sex, BDSM and a lot more. Alice also gives some practical advice for body positivity and managing a partner of a different height in the bedroom. For all this amazing information and more from a truly wonderful ambassador for better sex, join us for today’s episode! Show Highlights How Alice found herself at The Bunny Ranch. Why do people visit sex workers? Some of the common misconceptions around sex work. Alice’s advice for those listeners wanting to work on their dirty talk.  Closing the orgasm gap and finding ways to share pleasure. Alice’s advice to listener’s wanting to improve their fellatio skills. The reciprocal advice for cunnilingus. How to go about getting more acquainted with BDSM and sensation play. Use of safe words and aftercare and why they are so important. Clearly defining the BDSM acronym. Some of Alice’s tips for overcoming height difference between partners.  Getting over self doubt and getting on top of your partner. And much more! Tweetables “I believe so strongly in the good that legal sex workers can do for society and I believe so much so that it’s the perfect job for me that I plan to continue to do so.” — @TheAliceLittle [0:05:27.3] “If you can’t talk about sex and intimacy outside of the bedroom, you’re never going to get to the point where you can express yourself openly and comfortably while actually in the bedroom.” —   @TheAliceLittle [0:06:51.9] “It’s the biggest sexual mistake that America is making right now, we’re failing to ask what our partner actually likes.” — @TheAliceLittle [0:10:26.9] Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode Alice Little — Wing Woman Podcast — Alice Little Twitter — Alice Little Instagram — Moonlite Bunny Ranch — Alice Little Email — Dennis Hof — Ron Jeremy — Journal of Sex and Marital Therapy — Sephora — Ulta — Kink — Kink University — Adam and Eve — Liberator — Pornhub — Fleshlight —
Jason Julius is a world renowned sex coach and female orgasm expert and his goal is to help as many men, women, and couples achieve the amazing sex lives they deserve. In this episode we are going to discuss everything a man can do to give his partner more intense and satisfying pleasure inside and outside the bedroom. We also dive into how to really get your female partner aroused by communicating with her throughout the day, and building on the fantasy for her ultimate sexual readiness. Jason is very candid and shares all his tips and advice on stimulating your female partner’s G-spot and A-spot, ways to encourage her to let go towards ejaculation, and the real culprits behind premature and delayed ejaculation for men. So if you’re listening and have a male partner, you may want to get him to listen to this episode too! Key Points From This Episode Jason’s background and how he got to where he is today. Advice for getting your female partner aroused. Breaking down the arousal process for men and women. Understanding the concept of “sexy context”. What makes for good foreplay from a guy. The importance of quieting down your female partners’ mind. Simplicity and the general rules of dirty talk. Why it is critical to get to know yourself sexually. Advice for providing clitoral stimulation, manually and orally. How to find the G-spot, and why many people struggle to find it. Why using a lubricant is sometimes a must. Strategy for helping your partner achieve female ejaculation. The dangers of too much porn, and forming the wrong paths in your brain. And much more! Tweetables “I think that there’s a huge misunderstanding about female desire and how female desire actually works.” — @jasonjulius [0:05:37.1] “For guys, we need to understand that we need to be constantly flirting with our woman to create the fantasy that she desires to get her mind engaged.” — @jasonjulius [0:09:10.1] “The purpose of foreplay is to build up the fantasy.” — @jasonjulius [0:13:35.1] Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode Jason’s Squirting Tutorial Video - Jason Julius — Jason’s website — Jason on Twitter — Jason on YouTube — Come As You Are —
Comments (17)

Rodney Higginson

Wow, this was a very interesting episode. Man, it makes you think why do some people still get married?! Or maybe I just listening to the wrong podcasts. Nevertheless, there's no was in hell I'm staying in a sexless marriage or relationship for that matter. One year tops to work on it then I'm out. This poor woman is a trooper though, she been to hell and back and still manage to persevere. Good for her.

Feb 5th

levett store

Thanks for the information! Of course, everyone has their own rules when dating, which in one way or another will affect the further development of communication. But lately, I think I shouldn't bother with it and just enjoy life. That's why I decided to create the perfect boyfriend for myself with the help of Here I bought an incredibly realistic toy that brings me incredible pleasure and will never break my heart.

Oct 20th

yang mimi

but i like xinghaoya best-

Feb 16th

yang mimi

i know - the xinghaoya is amazing

Feb 16th

Rick Carter

I have type 1 diabetes for 35 years + and I definitely have NO issues getting aroused! I have to slam it in the door just to make him stand down 😬

Feb 4th

Naomi Bielefeldt

so i really loved and agreed with the majority of this. However it bothered me the masculine and feminine polarity comment. maybe that works for you and that's cool....but....What abt same sex marriages or non binary ppl????

Oct 17th

Samantha Meyer

Another way to eat pussy is to press your tongue firmly on her clit and roll your tongue, almost like your making your tongue do the worm. Lick upward firmly and slowly. Don't only focus on the clit, lick around the labia and tease her with quicker firm licks. Also,make sure to give her pussy little kisses then stick your tongue deep inside her. don't forget about the rest of her body, either. Grab her tits and caress her, tell her how much you love her pussy and how you could eat it all day and pull her hips towards you.

Jul 29th
Reply (1)

Samantha Meyer

is she reading off a script?? so inauthentic

Jul 29th

Jeremy Wadley

This is insane. If the guy cheated for YEARS he isn't going to change. It isn't HER responsibility to constantly change everything to keep him happy and occupied. If he wasn't/ isn't happy (and not just sexually) he will never stop looking. They weren't one night stands just to keep him sexually satisfied, he DATED the women. One for 11 months!!!!! They are both just afraid of change. They want the comfort of 25 years of history, yet at the same time they don't want it anymore but they're too afraid to let go. Also, this entire conversation is from her point of view. All she knows from his side is what he tells her. He could very well still be cheating on her but saying and doing all this to placate her.

Apr 10th

A. Beee

This guest is irritating. Awful episode and I really enjoy this podcast. I have heard her on other podcasts and she is equally annoying. Sounds like she tags straight off a script.

Mar 28th

Lara Stemmer

why isnt there any female imput. if you're talking about a female experience

Jan 7th
Reply (3)

Sonja Jensen

on podcast 4. While I'm enjoying these talks, I can't help but think how it's a bit of mansplaining. Where are the womens voices in the bad "girls" bible? It's an interesting view into men's minds, but curious who the actual intended audience is?

Dec 4th
Reply (1)
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