We start off in full chaos mode: new nicknames courtesy of Ron Bennington (“Kay-Leeb from Baltimore” makes his debut), ditching craft beer for Coors Banquet, fantasizing about lifted trucks, and creating a brand-new drinking game called That’s a Racial. Things spiral into police scanner codes, family reunion drama, and the single most revolting Jolly Rancher story ever told.

Eventually we pit two very different movies head-to-head: Kevin Bacon’s bike-messenger fever dream Quicksilver takes on Tim Burton’s bloody musical Sweeney Todd. We argue over best performances, cinematography, soundtracks, and opening scenes, Kevin Bacon’s wheelie skills, and whether meat pies or messenger bags make for a better love story.

It’s 80s stockbroker freedom vs. Victorian throat-slitting, and you decide who rides away the winner.

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